


Lost Brother

by Quine



Series: The fifth brother [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: (Destiel), Angelic Grace, Archangels, Canon-Typical Violence, Chuck Shurley is God, Eventual Happy Ending, Falling In Love, Fix-It, Fluff, Gabriel (Supernatural) Feels, How Do I Tag, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Lucifer (Supernatural) Feels, M/M, Protective Older Brothers, Season 11 is only a bit of a backgroundstory, Season/Series 05, Season/Series 05 Spoilers, Season/Series 11 Spoilers, Swearing, You don't need to know this stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-09-20
Packaged: 2019-04-30 18:21:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 16
Words: 61,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14502810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quine/pseuds/Quine
Summary: The Apocalypse has started and the Devil is free. The Winchesters do what they always do, and continue the family buisiness. But apart from Lucifer roaming the earth, Dean and Sam gain an unlikely ally. Well thanks to him, Castiel is around a lot more. And Dean can't help but notice, that the blue eyed Angel causes some strange feelings to rise in his chest.With the start of the Apocalypse, Azrael regains his powers and his memories. Being the oldest of the Archangels, his awakening causes some things to change drastically.Determinate to find out what caused this mess, he tries to find out the truth and prevent his brothers from killing each other. On the way to fix his family, he meets the Winchesters. (After all they are the center of this apocalyptic mess)





	1. The Awakening (Sympathy for the Devil/Good God Y'all)

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural and I don't make any profits by writing this
> 
> While the first three chapters are from Azrael's point of view, there are changes of pov. throughout the story.
> 
> Season 11 doesn't really affect this story, if you have not watched it SPOILER ALERT for the next few sentences. All you need to know is basically, that God has a sister, the Darkness and that she was locked away a long time ago by god and his archangels. (She now resides in the Mark of Cain, which seals her away, but she can corrupt the bearer of it.)

Prolog:  
_There was a time, when God demanded, that the Darkness should be outcast. The archangels were proud to help their father with this difficult task. But one of them protested. Not the sword of god, not the brightest of them, nor the Angel of Justice or the healer. The oldest. The first to exist after God and his Sister. The Angel of Death. Forgotten. Outcast for his protest. Out of fear, the task would fail, if only one of them stood against thy Father. The other angels mourned their loss, but they picked up the sword and fought the fight of the righteous. Cause thy father had to be obeyed._

2009

It had been a tough last year for mankind. Angels, Demons, the 66 seals. And now Lucifer was free. Not that somebody noticed. Some people maybe. Few. The ones, who knew the truth. These, who knew how to read the signs. They knew something was up. Something big. Hunters. Psychics. And of course, the Creatures, which lurked in the night. But almost no one noticed something subtler, but not of lesser importance. The same time, Lucifer escaped the cage, there was a shift in the air, a rift came into existence and something came through. Something fell from the sky out of thin air. It happened so fast, that the people who saw it dismissed it as a play of the light. And it was 5 am. Maybe they imagined things? But not the Demons. Hell felt it. And other than the Angels, who were too involved in the starting Apocalypse to grant this little anomaly some attention, sent Hell some of its warriors to check it out.

 

Chapter 1:  
(Sympathy for the Devil/Good God Y’All)

The first thing he noticed, was, that he was falling. He approached the ground in rapid pace. The impact would kill every human. But he wasn´t human. He was an angel. It hurt. More than it should have but the only thing that could tell you, that something had happened here, was the broken concrete on the ground and the few scratches on Azrael’s body and the bruises that had yet to show. He stood up groaning. Azrael shifted and popped his spine. What the hell had happened? He looked at the few bloody scratches that showed up on his skin. That should have been healed by now. He frowned. He knew he should leave that place, his head started hurting and he was in no shape to win a fight should something evil show up. Azrael took off and landed two states away next to a highway. He stumbled over his own feet. His grace was lacking power. But he couldn’t think more about that issue, because that was the moment the pain increased, and memories worth of millenniums poured into his mind. Azrael put up his hand to shield his head. A useless human gesture but it was too much to deal with. The input slowed down slightly, and Azrael could sort out his head. He ignored the memories for now and instead listened to the Angels. The years of his absence had been not without change. The beginning of humanity, eons of life and evolution. Gabriel’s disappearance from heaven, Lucifer cast down by Michael. Lucifer. For the first time in millennia’s he was able to see his brothers again and his family was a broken mess. Azrael had still a hard time to deal with everything he knew now. Here and now he didn’t even remember where he went, after God had cast him out. Everything was mixed up in his head. “Where was God even? Where was he in this whole thing? Obviously, he didn’t care. After all he had cast his oldest son out without even thinking about this twice.” Azrael assumed bitter. But there had always been the thought, that at least his brothers could rely on each other. But now? Back in time he had always been close to the Darkness. After all, Azrael was the first to exist after God and her (and of course the Leviathans but he did his best to forget these Horrible things.) And God had yet to create his little brothers. They worshipped their father like nothing else. Azrael remembered teaching Michael to fly. A fond smile played around his lips. And Michael had been so eager to teach Lucifer to do the same. What had happened between them. They’d been almost as close as Azrael and Lucifer. He remembered when Raphael came into existence. He would look up to Michael like he was the sun. Michael, eager to be the big brother again, showed him everything. Azrael and Lucifer had spent a lot of time together, when Michael was occupied. Lucifer soon forgot to feel rejected and everything was fine again. And when Gabriel had been a mere fledgling Lucifer taught him all the tricks he knew. Nobody was safe from this little pair of tricksters. They had been happy back then.  
Now, in his head, everybody talked about the starting Apocalypse, now that Lucifer escaped the cage. He had to change things.  
The angels in his head talked and talked. Almost hysterical were some of them. But other than the cage and Lucifer, another thing was often mentioned. The Winchesters. It was time to gain some information. He hid his presence and with a flap of wings he was gone.

In the meantime, demons were examining the little town in Iowa where Azrael had popped out of nothing. The jumping from meatsuit to meatsuit didn’t get them more information. They returned to report to Hell. Not a bit wiser, but with a trail of body’s left behind. But the interest the demons took in this Town and the street, in which the road still had a giant crater didn’t go without noticing. So, one of Heavens Lesser Angels was sent to inspect this place. The angel had more to tell than his Demonic counterparts. Because a faint trail of grace, which had gone unnoticed by the Demons, led a trace. The Angel followed it to a highway two states away till the trail broke up.

Azrael had listened to the Angels and decided to go to the place where Lucifer broke free. It was easy to find the enormous mass of energy the Archangel had left behind. He stopped near a Convent in Maryland, Ilchester. The Moment he landed, he threw up. Azrael had almost forgotten about his grace. Wherever he came from this had cost him a lot of energy. He shouldn’t use his powers till his grace had regenerated itself. That was unfortunate. He swore loudly. Where did that came from? Azrael didn’t know where he picked up that habit. Well he had other problems. He couldn’t hide his essence forever. While his grace was lacking power he still had the aura of an archangel, so he stuffed down his grace in the darkest corner of his being and started walking. This had to do it for now.

As he approached St. Mary’s he felt Lucifer. Or what he left behind. The energy left a bad taste in his mouth. It was darker somehow and bitter but underneath it was still the same. Like the smell of the air, when it snows. Burning Ice, sparks of grace and raw power. He felt sad about the change, but there was nothing he could do about this right now, so he continued walking towards the center of the energy burst. It was useless. Nobody was there anymore. Only the carcasses of two women, and a faint trace of sulfur around them. Azrael shook his head, to get rid of the temporarily dizziness, that overcame him. He had yet to adapt to his many Memories, which continued to flow around in his head. He wanted to leave this place behind. It only made him miserable. Azrael decided he would need a safe place to hide and sort out his head, if he wanted to regain his powers.  
Death lay in the air as he got away from St. Mary’s. The impact, the true form of an Angel left behind, did obviously no good to normal people. While he was walking, he searched his pockets. Azrael hadn’t paid much attention to his clothes before. He was wearing a black leather Jacket, boots in the same color, a simple T-shirt and ripped jeans. Not that this made a difference after he literally fell from heaven. Fortunately, only the outside of his clothes was ruined. In his pockets he found a lighter, some Cigarettes, which he threw away a hairband and a wallet. Inside of it, Azrael found some cash a Credit Card and an ID. William Romano. That could be useful.  
He was impatient and frustrated. Walking was so slow. But Azrael didn’t want to risk it and fly again. Last time didn’t go very well, and it wasn’t very subtle too, if he continued to throw up. “Walking it is then”, he thought sighing.

His memories were still a mess and his headache didn’t really improve his mood. Luckily a sign announced a motel not far away. After he checked in under the name of William Romano, and the strange looks he received – after all, he looked like he got hit by a car – Azrael got into his room. He warded it as much as he could, cause: “I don’t want to be disturbed”, and then sat down onto the crappy Motel bed and closed his eyes.

The next few hours were a mess. Apparently, his father had stripped him from Grace and stuffed him down to earth, where he was reincarnated as a human as soon as this race began to exist. Again, and again and again. Miraculously he had regained his Grace and now he could remember every life he ever lived. He put these memories into the very last part of his subconscious, except the life of his vessel. William Romano. A boy growing up in a poor part of New York as a Kid of a Family which had its roots in Italy. Familiar with the Italian Mafia trough his father who had died in a shooting when he was little. Later a soldier. But that life was now such a little part of his being that it hardly mattered now. But how he had regained his grace, was a mystery to him. And why did he fall from the sky again? Ah yes. Flying was a no go at the moment.

Azrael decided to take a shower. Human habits die hard, now that he could remember them. He stripped all his clothes and stepped into the tub. Somehow taking a shower helped him to put himself together. The little bathroom was full of steam and Azrael raised a hand to wipe the foggy mirror clean. He pushed his shoulder long black hair out of his face, only to reveal his eyes. When he was a human he remembered his iris to be a dark brown most of the time, but now it was such a bright grey, that it almost seemed white. His grace made a difference after all. The scratches on his body and the bruises had already faded apart from a few nastier ones. That meant he was getting better, but it was slow. Azrael thought how he could speed up the regeneration process of his grace. Maybe he should live like a human some time. If he would eat and sleep, his Grace wouldn’t need to take care of his body’s physical needs and had more time to regain its powers. Living as a human wasn’t so bad after all.

The next morning, he woke up and felt better. His Body was fully healed and as he felt for his Grace, he noticed that it got a lot of its power back. At least, now he was a match for a regular Angel. But he knew that a fight would drain him back to the point of almost nothing, at least if he used his angelic powers. The one thing he couldn’t handle without using his Grace was fixing his clothes. After he had done so, he remembered, that he should grab something to eat. Azrael left his Motel room. Maybe he could find a Diner. But without a car… He knew how to highjack one. His former lives taught him something. But was it worth the trouble? Azrael didn’t think long. His morals weren’t very angelic after all this time being human. He found an inconspicuous black car and after a short time, it was his. He drove around and soon found a Place called Arby’s. He ordered some Fries and talked to the waitress. Maybe there was a bit flirting involved too. Well, you had to enjoy the little things.  
The Waitress disappeared into the back of the Diner, not without flashing him a smile and Azrael thought about what to do next. During the ride here, he had listened to the Angels talking. He wanted to find out what had happened. Why was his family so torn apart? He wanted to ask Lucifer what had happened. But as he expanded his grace, he couldn’t find him. Michael on the other hand wasn’t hiding. He was in heaven. But if he really was the one to cast Lucifer down, then he had only one part of the Story. And he remembered how Michael was when he told the tale, after he and Lucifer had an argument. He was always right. Azrael wanted to hear the true Story. Maybe Raphael. But judging the situation by what he remembered, Raphael would back up Michael in every point. This held only one option. Gabriel. And he was also nowhere to be found. If you could believe the talking of the younger Angels he disappeared ages ago.

His thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of his Food. And while he was eating, Azrael decided, that he wanted to find the Winchesters. They were evidently the Center of this whole Apocalyptic stuff. And if he had that little piece of background information he could talk to his brothers. Azrael expanded his Grace and tried to find them, but without success. “Fucking Great”, he sighed.

Another Customer looked scandalized up from behind his Newspaper. But Azrael couldn’t care less now. He had never done this before. Find Humans this way, but it should have been easy. Maybe his Grace was too weak. Azrael tried it again but now he searched for the guy, who had been there when he checked into the Motel. He had no problems with that. But the Winchesters remained hidden. Well, then he had to find them through another way. The only question was how? It was either the Winchesters or Gabriel. And finding an Archangel, who didn’t want to be found would certainly be more difficult than finding a bunch of humans. Hopefully. And if he was honest with himself, Azrael was kind of afraid to meet his brothers after all this time. He was different now, and by what he had heard, they certainly changed too. After all, they hadn’t seen each other since... well a long time ago.  
Finding the Winchesters was now his task. And he would not fail.

Azrael drove back to his Motel. Soon he wouldn’t need this car anymore and could rely on his wings again. His mood lightened up a little by that thought. But how could he find the Winchesters? Asking an Angel? Nah. He didn’t want Michaels attention by now. As much as it hurt. And asking someone who knew them? Azrael had no clue. He didn’t know one living person who had connections to the Winchesters.

Suddenly he smirked. If he couldn’t ask a living person, then he had to ask someone who was dead. He was the Angel of Death after all.  
Back in his Motel room he decided to do it here. He had put up enough warding to keep everyone out he wanted to, so he sat down on the floor. He focused, expanded all his senses and felt what he had ignored the rest of the time. He could now feel every soul in this town. And he felt the life force of every being in this range. The old, the young and the sick ones. But that was not what he was searching for. There it was. A soul that had cut every connection to the physical plane. Someone, who had just died and was still there. But there was something else. A different energy. It felt kind of familiar. Azrael frowned and tried to grasp it. He succeeded and pulled it into his room. When he opened his eyes, he found himself in front of a Man in a suit. But not quite a man, judging by the angelic energy that surrounded the being. It was just a shell masking the real being.  
“What are you?”

The man in the suit looked confused but answered nevertheless. “I am a Reaper”. After a short pause he continued. “I have to say that you feel fairly like my Master. But somehow different.”

Azrael tilted his head slightly. “Your Master? And who would that be?”

“Death”, it said.

Of course, Azrael knew Story’s about Reaper but only from his human lives. But that was something else. Last time he was here and aware of his angelic being, not one Human had walked upon Earth. Azrael thought about revealing his identity, but he wasn’t sure. He would give it a try, if that ended bad he could always wipe the Reapers memory. “I am the Angel of Death”

“I wasn’t aware of that” the Reaper said. Obviously, he didn’t really know what to do with this Information. “Well I do have work to do. If you excuse me” He turned around as if he wanted to disappear.

“Wait!” The Reaper froze, and Azrael stood up. “I have some questions”

The Reaper turned around, with a strange expression on his face. It was like he had to obey Azrael, if he wanted to, or not.

“I’m looking for information. About the Apocalypse. And the Winchesters.”

“Well, I could tell you” the Reaper said reluctantly.

“Show me” said Azrael. “I want to look at your mind”

The Reaper eyes widened, but took a step into the Archangels direction. Azrael took it as an invitation and put his hands on both sides of the Reapers head. And then he dove into the creature’s mind.  
After the procedure, Azrael dismissed the Reaper, whose Name was apparently Richard. He was happy to submit and disappeared. He didn’t look very well then. After all, Azrael hadn’t only searched for specific information but had rather absorbed everything the Reaper knew. Now Azrael had information about this World. The Supernatural, Demons and Angels, the four Horsemen and of course the Winchesters. Azrael had no doubt, that the Reaper would have been able to find them, but after everything he knew now, he thought it would be better to approach the Winchesters on his own.  
He paid the bill and checked out. A simple snap with his fingers and the Numbers on the license plate of his stolen car read something else. Azrael left Ilchester behind and followed the road out of the civilization into the wilderness.

He thought about the things he had learned. The Winchesters were Brothers. Sam the younger one and Dean the older. They were Raised to be Hunters. They had both died a few times by now. They were infamous for the mess the left behind every time they died and came back. At least with the Reapers. Dean Winchester sold his soul to safe his brother’s life after he was stabbed. Dean died after his time ran out and went straight to Hell. He was the righteous man, destined to break the first seal, to let Lucifer roam free. Raised from Hell by an Angel, reunited with his brother they tried to stop the Apocalypse. But Sam Winchester was the one to break the last seal by killing Lilith, the first Demon and now Lucifer was free. But the circumstances of this whole thing were still unknown to him.

To find them and gain their trust, Azrael had to become Hunter. Well maybe he wouldn't have to, but while he was searching, he could at least have some fun. And maybe it was a bit of payback. After all, a few of his incarnations had found their end through the claws of a monster.

It took little time for Azrael to become one. After two weeks he was established in the business. It also helped, that he regained his full strength and could smite every Monster on his way if he wanted to. Azrael also felt the one or the other reaper, but he decided to let them do their work. He was fast. Faster than every human, who had to solve the case. Within the first three days he had wiped 6 different towns clean. But smiting a Monster was soon getting boring. Azrael decided that he wanted to do a few hunts the human way. It was way more fun. He also met other Hunters and went to work on cases with them. He jumped from State to state and “coincidentally” met hunters on different cases. To gain their trust a little faster, he sometimes altered their memories a bit. “Yeah I knew him from a hunt back then.” Or “His father once ganked a ghoul, who was about to eat my leg. How is he by the way?” or “I think Jimmy mentioned him once”, sounded way better then a "Who are you?!", while a gun was pointed at his head. It was on a hunt like this, when he first got a lead to the Winchesters.

Azrael and another guy were drinking upon the successful hunt. It had been a simple salt and burn - It was way easier if you knew, that you could simply send the Ghost onto the other side if you wanted to – when Craig, the Hunter he met on this case said: “You’re young and new in the business. So listen up. Ya know Bobby Singer? If you ever need back up or Information on something or someone, he usually can help ya with that. But don’t ever get on his bad side. I tell ya that.”

And after he finished saying said words, he drank up his beer, and patted Azrael on his shoulder. But not without putting a fake FBI calling Card on the table.

“My Number is on that thing too. Was nice to meet’cha Will. See ya around. Alive hopefully.”

With a laugh he left the bar leaving Azrael behind to pay the bill. Hunters were assholes. But he couldn’t care about that now. He took the card from the table and turned it around. In addition to the phone Number printed on the front, there was a telephone Number scribbled on the backside, with the name Bobby Singer in front of it. Azrael paid the bill and left the bar too. His half empty bottle of beer was left behind. He couldn´t get drunk anyways. But Azrael hadn’t tried to much into this direction yet.  
He had not forgotten his goal. To find the Winchesters. And maybe this Mr. Singer had some answers.

“Yeah?” a rough voice said at the other end of the line.

“Hello, is this Bobby Singer?”

“That’s me. What do you want?”

“My name is William Romano, I am a hunter. I was told to ask you if I needed information on someone or something. I’m looking for the Winchesters”

“I can’t help you with that.” The voice sounded angry.

“I’m sorry for bothering you then” Azrael said coldly.

This Bobby knew certainly something but if he didn’t want to tell him voluntary, then he had to find another way. He was an Archangel after all. He wanted to hang up, but the voice stopped him. He thought that he heard a distant “Balls” and then Bobby continued.  
“But if you need a case, I have something for ya. It’s a shame, but we need every Hunter we can get these times.”

“I’m listening”

The case was a witch going rogue in Wisconsin. 3 People had already died until Azrael showed up. Azrael grinned as he burned the bitch.  
He was thinking if he should pay Bobby Singer a visit. There were ways to get information. Around the same time, Azrael paid more attention to the Angels again. Mostly they talked about Demons and the upcoming war but now he heard something, that proved his determination to stay away from his brothers. There were whispers. Raphael walked upon Earth.  
While he struggled with himself, Bobby called. As he picked up, he was greeted with a “There is a case. Are you near Pennsylvania? I have a few hunters on it, but a backup would be nice”

Probably some apocalyptic shit going on. Azrael decided this could wait. First, he would find his brother. He could still Deal with the case later. He had to go to Maine.


	2. First Meetings (Free to be you and me)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azrael meet's the one of the Winchesters for the first time and faces one of his brothers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always add the names of episodes from Supernatural at the beginning if you were wondering what that meant, because my fanfiction roughly follows the timeline of season 5.

(Free to be you and me)

Waterville, Maine. That was where Raphael was last seen. Well It couldn’t hurt, if he only checked if everything was fine. Now that he was again fully juiced up on power, he could easily hide himself from everyone but angels. He still had to damp down his Grace, and hope that nobody would take a closer look.  
There was a gas station in this city, but rather, you could say, that once, there was a gas station. Probably Angels and Demons, who had fought against each other. And then Raphael smote everything in range.  
Invisible to the human eye, Azrael walked over the remnants of the building. Here and there, he could make out the imprint of wings on the ground. A source of great power had killed everything that remained at this place. There was a trace of Grace left, where the center of the power had been. Raphael. Azrael had no doubt, that he had been there. His Grace felt different from Lucifer, who was like Ice. No Raphael felt like the crackling of Thunder and Lightning. Wind and Rain. A Thunderstorm in the summer, which is raw power and electricity, but also wipes the air clean of the tension that is there, the day before. That was Raphael. But Azrael couldn’t make out any feelings. The trace was only a vague impression. Maybe Raphael wore a Vessel. That would explain it. Perhaps the person was still around. He only had to find this guy.  
Azrael took off and searched the town, but without success. Raphael was long gone. Maybe he should go to the case Bobby had assigned him. But no. There were other Hunters to take care of that. Well, he would check into a motel and tomorrow he would ask the Police. Azrael had to do this like a Hunter.  
The next day he snapped up a fake FBI badge and a suit. His preferred outfit was still the one, he had worn, when he regained his memories. But the suit wasn’t bad either. Maybe his previous life had a bigger influence on him, than he thought. He shook his head to clear his mind and with a flap of Wings, he was gone.  
Azrael arrived near the Police station. He walked the last few meters and introduced himself as Agent Lewis. He was sent to see Deputy Framingham. To his Surprise he wasn’t the only FBI-Agent to be there. Two other people were already talking to said Deputy. But one of the two wasn’t just an ordinary man, but an Angel. Quickly Azrael verified the state of his hidden Grace and stuffed it down deeper. Probably Hunters. But what did an angel in the company of a human? That would be a problem. Of what he had heard, most of them weren’t very fond of them. Well he would have to see for himself. They were showing their, most likely, fake FBI badges to the Deputy, and introduced themselves. Hurriedly Azrael took a few steps in their direction and showed his badge too.  
“I’m sorry that I am late. Agents” he said as he directed his attention towards them. Wait. These faces looked familiar. The Hunter seemed confused, but the Angel looked at him intensely. He started whispering to the other one.

He couldn’t listen at the moment. Azrael was too occupied to keep his mouth from gaping like a fish. This was Dean Winchester. The man he was searching for. And the Angel had to be Castiel. Often called the pet Angel of the Brothers. Obviously, the Luck was on his side.

“Dean I don’t think…”, Castiel said but he was interrupted by the Hunter.

“Agent. I believe there was a mistake in the Department, when we were both sent to this case.”

The Archangel pulled himself together. He had to keep up appearances. Azrael nodded briefly. “Yes, it seems so. But while we are here”, Azrael turned to the Deputy. “Mind if we ask a few questions?”

The officer started talking now. “Yeah sure. Talk here though.” He pointed at one of his ears. “Hearings all blown to hell in this one” he said while leading them to his office.  
They followed him, and the detective sat down behind his desk. The Angel shot him a strange look. But soon directed his attention back to the officer.

“That happen recently?”, the blond Hunter asked the Detective, while he also took a seat.

“At the gas station, that’s why you’re here, aren’t you?” he answered.

“Exactly, but could you tell us the story again, from your point of view?” Azrael interjected. While he was distracted by the others, he was here to gain information, and he was determined to get them.

“A call came in. Disturbance out at the Pump and Go on Route 4.”

“What kind of Disturbance?” the blond one asked.

“Would not have believed my eyes if I hadn’t seen it myself. We’re talking a riot. Full scale.”

“How many?”

“Thirty, forty, in all-out-or-be-killed combat?”

Azrael only listened to the conversation. Slightly uncomfortable, because of the looks, Castiel shot him here and now. Hopefully he didn’t suspect anything.

“Any idea what set them off?” Dean asked.

“It’s angels and demons, probably.” Castiel said.

The officer looked at him strangely and the angel stared back.

“They’re skirmishing all over the globe”

“Come again?” the officer said and turned to Azrael. “What did he say?”

The trenchcoated angel and the Hunter started talking simultaneously.

“Demons. Demons” “Nothing. Nothing” Castiel shut up.

Azrael had to suppress a snicker, but a little smile tugged at his lips nevertheless. Clearly this Angel did really not know how to talk to people. Quickly the Hunter added: “Demons, you know, drink, adultery. We all have our demons, Walt.

“I guess” Framingham said.

“And what happened next?” Azrael said, feeling the need to fill the awkward silence.

“Freaking explosion, that’s what. They said it was one of those underground gas tanks, but, uh, I don’t think so”

“Why not?” The Hunter asked

“Wasn’t your usual fireball. It was, um…“  
“  
pure white”. The Angel in the Trench coat had finished the sentence for him. Azrael raised an eyebrow. He wasn’t as stupid as he seemed.

“Yeah. Gas station was leveled. Everyone was…it was just horrible. And I see this one guy, kneeling, real focused- like, not a damn scratch on him” 

“You know him?”, the blond one asked.

“Donnie Finneman. Mechanic there”

“Let me guess, he just, uh, vanished into thin air?” the Hunter said.

“Uh no Kolchak. He is down at Saint Pete’s”

“Saint Pete’s” the Angel repeated.

They left the Police Station and Azrael turned over to the strange pair. “Well, I suppose you two will also go looking for this mysterious man?”

“Yeah but we can handle this. You don’t have to come with us” the older Winchester replied.

“You two are Hunters, aren’t you?” Azrael said. 

“And who are you?”, Dean spoke up, a little shaken by this sudden question.

Azrael grinned, and decided to go by his “human” name. He stretched out his hand. “William Romano. Nice to meet you”

The blond one took it. “Dean Winchester. And that is Castiel.” 

 

Dean and Castiel had tried to talk him out of this case, but Azrael had insisted on coming with them. He also used the time to get a closer look at Dean. Obviously Castiel had marked his Ribs with enochian Sigills that hid him from every Angels sight. After they met at the Police Station, they had agreed to meet again in a few hours, this was how he found himself on the backseat of a black Chevy Impala, with the younger Angel riding shotgun.

“You know man”, Dean started again. “You don’t have to come with us. We can handle this on our own. How old are you even? It’s a miracle the Framingham didn’t say anything.” Dean looked at him through the mirror.

“I’m 26“, said Azrael. (Well, at least his body was) “And it’s always good to have a backup“ He was glad that Castiel didn’t yet suspect him to be an Angel but he still looked at him strangely. Probably trying to figure out what kind of thing he was.

“This isn’t just a normal case.” Dean struggled to find the right words, when the other Angel interrupted. 

“We are going to hunt for an Archangel. It is probably going to end deadly for everyone involved, but Dean” answered Castiel. The hunter gripped the steering wheel tightly at this statement. Obviously he didn’t like that thought.

“Okay.” Azrael received a strange look from both Dean and Castiel. Raphael was mighty enough to kill them both with a snap of his fingers. But so was Azrael. Well, they didn’t know that. Maybe he should have showed a bigger reaction, concerning this topic. Before he could correct his mistake, the car stopped in front of the Motel Azrael had checked in.

“You know”, Dean turned over to look at him, and patted Castiel on the shoulder. “Cas here is an Angel, and if he says that it is going to end like this, it probably is. So, I wouldn’t like to see some kid dead, because of that shit going on here.”

But Azrael was not giving in. He wanted to hear their plan first. They had decided, that Azrael was getting his stuff, and then they would go to the place where Dean and Cas resided.  
The moment Azrael stepped through the door into his room, he could feel Castiel’s Grace wash over him. Every normal Person would have been asleep as soon as the Angel had touched him. But Azrael only felt the intention behind the movement. Too surprised to do anything he stopped where he stood. Obviously, he wasn’t the only one. But not so Dean. He jumped forward and Azrael felt a hand on his throat and a blade on his neck. He would have laughed, if he hadn’t been so stupid to not expect something like this. Why had he let his guard down. He hadn’t paid any attention towards his surroundings. But he had been too busy thinking about finding Raphael. Not that there was anything, he had to fear from these two, but this was unfortunate. Earning their trust indeed. Azrael was tempted to roll his eyes, when he heard Deans angry voice. “What are you?!”

“He is an Angel” Castiel had overcome his state of stupor and stepped forward to get a closer look. “There is a faint trace of Grace. I couldn’t really grasp it, till I touched him.” Castiel tilted his head slightly, as if he didn’t understand what was going on. “Do you think you can handle this situation on your own for a second?”

Dean gave a short nod in Castiel’s direction and with a flap of wings he was gone only to return with an old looking ceramic jar in his hand.  
A few moments later Azrael found himself shoved inside a circle of oil, that was lit, the second he stood in it. He hadn’t as much tried to resist. He was more confused about this action. “And this should stop me from going after you?” Azrael raised an eyebrow.

“You won’t cross the holy fire. That would be your death”, Castiel said.  
Azrael looked at the innocent looking flames licking on the wooden floor. The Archangel poked slightly against the holy fire with his grace. The circle seemed to have at least a bit of a binding trait. He had to restrain himself to not test the boundaries of this circle and leash out with his grace. The light in the room flickered dangerously. He’d always had a bad temper. But he didn’t want to show his abilities yet. Castiel took a step forward raising his dark wings. Probably trying to intimidate him. “Who are you?” Castiel asked.

“My name is Azrael. But I doubt that you know me.” Azrael smirked, slightly amused by this little Angel trying to scare him. He also let his wings show. Well his smallest pair. He didn’t want give away his true nature yet.

“Did Michael send you here?” Dean asked.

Now the Archangel was confused. “Why would he?” Azrael asked curious. Maybe now he would get some answers.

“Perhaps to find his precious Vessel, that he can’t win the war without?!” Dean said sarcastically. 

Azrael thought about this. So, Dean was Michael’s human Vessel. Now it made sense, why the Winchesters were the center of so much attention. “But if this was the case”, Azrael began slowly, “wouldn’t he be here by now?”

“You tell me?”, Dean replied and sent a threatening look in Azrael’s direction.

“Dean. We don’t have time for this if we want to find Raphael.”

“And what about him? We don’t even know why he is here.” Dean pointed towards the Archangel.

Castiel shot him a pleading look. „Does this really matter at the moment? We need to use this opportunity”. “Please Dean”, he added after a moment.

The Hunter looked torn. He wiped his face with his hand and looked at Azrael, then back at Castiel. Dean sighed.

“Fine. Let’s do it. Should we let him live?” the Hunter said nodding toward their prisoner. Azrael raised an eyebrow. Well wasn't that nice to hear.

“I don’t think that he is a threat at the moment”, said Castiel hesitantly, „but if he gets help or break’s free...“ He shared a look with Dean. „We can’t take this risk. I am sorry brother.“ He threw his Angel-blade. Azrael was too surprised to react. He had expected a longer discussion over this topic, but his thoughts were ended abruptly. The silvery blade pierced his chest and pain spread through his insides. He choked and light erupted from the wound. It wouldn’t kill him but his newly regained grace was severely injured. While Azrael could have remained on his feet, he let himself fall to the floor, cautiously avoiding the flames. The older Winchester stepped over the ring of fire and ripped out the Blade with a sickening squelching sound. He turned towards his angel and handed him the weapon. “Let’s go”

After they had disappeared, the Archangel slowly got up and inspected his wound. Underneath his bloody T-shirt, the flesh had already started knitting itself together, but his grace wasn’t so lucky. It would heal with time, but still, he was beyond pissed. All he had wanted was a nice lil’ chat with the Winchester and his Angel, and while it was a good tactical move to get him out of the way from their point of view - he would probably have done the same in their situation - they had tried to kill him! And that had not been a pleasant experience! Over his head the lightbulbs exploded and the floor cracked, while the shadows in the room seemed to grow. The Archangel pulled himself together. He needed to think straight. Azrael tried to touch the flames. With a hiss he pulled back his fingers. Apparently, Castiel had been right. With a frustrated sigh he sat down on the floor. Gone was his chance to see Raphael. His anger flared up again, but quickly dissolved into sadness. He wasn’t one step closer to understand, how to help his family. Everyone seemed to wait for the big showdown of Michael and Lucifer. He couldn’t still believe what he had learned from the Reaper. The Lucifer he knew wouldn’t have, no couldn’t have done something to get Michael to cast him down, even if their Father had demanded it. Michael had loved his brother. What had changed Lucifer to act like this. To create the first Demon. Lucifer’s fate had been even worse than his own. Had he been such a threat to humanity that they had to imprison him? And Raphael. He had been destined to heal, and yet he had wiped out so many lives. And he didn’t even start to think about Gabriel. He had always been upset when Michael and Lucifer fought.  
Azrael shook his head. His best lead to get one of his brothers to listen to him would still be the Winchesters. At least Michael would listen if he was with the older brother. Dean was after all his true Vessel. He couldn’t lose this opportunity. Dean Winchester was in this town and it would take ages to find him again, if he lost him now. The flames were almost gone. In this moment he felt the presence of Raphael wash over him from the other end of the town. And he didn’t seem very happy.

In the meantime, Cas and Dean had visited Raphael’s old vessel, and eventually got the Archangel to show up, only to find himself inside a circle of burning holy oil, in their hideout.

“Don’t look at me, it was his idea.” Dean said

“Where is he?”, Castiel asked

“God? Didn’t you hear? He is dead Castiel. Dead. But there is no other explanation. He is gone for good.”

“You are lying.”

“Am I”, said Raphael. “Do you remember the twentieth century? Think the twenty-first is going any better? Do you think God would have let any of that happen, if he were alive?”

“Oh yeah? Well then who invented the Chinese basket trick?”, said Dean.

“Careful” The thunder outside multiplied. “That’s my father you are talking about, boy”

“Yeah, who would be so proud to know his sons started the frigging apocalypse.” 

“Who ran off and disappeared. Who left no instructions and a world to run?” Raphael sounded almost emotional.

“Daddy ran away and disappeared. He didn’t happen to work for the post office, did he? Dean exchanged a look with Castiel.

“This is funny to you? You are living in a godless Universe.

“And? What, you and the other kids just decided to throw an apocalypse while he was gone?”

“We are tired. We just want it to be over. We just want…paradise.” His eyes wandered off and looked at something behind Dean. But he hadn’t noticed and continued talking. Soon Raphael’s eyes were back  
on him.

“So, what, God dies and makes you the boss and you decide you can do whatever you want?”

“Yes. And whatever we want, we get.”

At this, the windows busted in. Castiel raised his voice.

“If God is dead, why have I returned? Who brought me back?

“Did it ever occur to you that maybe Lucifer raised you?” Raphael answered.

“No.“, the younger Angel said but his grace flickered in uncertainty.

“Think about it. He needs all the rebellious angels he can find. You know it adds up.”

“Let’s go”, Castiel said, and he turned around, only to stop, because if he hadn’t, he would have been running headfirst into Azrael.

Azrael had waited patiently for the flames to burn down. As soon as this happened he took off, to find Dean and Castiel. If he were human, he would’ve hissed at the way his grace strained while he flew, but he had other priorities.  
It was easy to find the source of the power loss, that prevailed throughout the city. The angel and his hunter-buddy were probably the reason behind Raphael’s anger. Well their chance of surviving this Apocalypse was very low, if they continued to piss of Archangels at this pace.  
He stopped in front of an abandoned house. Azrael was greeted with the sight of the black Impala. With a flap of wings, he stood in the hallway of the building. The air tasted like thunder and the storm outside spoke for itself. Azrael swallowed hard. He could feel Raphael in every part of his being. His brother didn’t seem to have the same amount of self-restraint he had. Should he leave? Azrael bit his lip in awfully human way. He heard the angry voice of the older Winchester brother. There was no going back. “Yeah, who would be so proud to know his sons started the frigging apocalypse.” 

Azrael exhaled and then slowly followed the voices through the dusty hallway. Footprints were visible on the floor. Azrael reached a doorway. He stopped beside it and then took a last step forward.

“Who ran off and disappeared? Who left no instructions and a world to run?”

For the first time in centuries Azrael saw his brother. 

He looked at him. It was different, now that he wore a vessel. Instead of reading his emotions directly from his true form he had to take a closer look and watch his face instead. Raphael was angry, but underneath, he looked so lost. God hadn’t been in Heaven for a long time, and his little brother wasn’t taking it well. He had changed very much. Azrael had a hard time to contain his own bitterness.  
Nobody had even noticed, that he was here by now. Azrael’s grace was still hidden, and Dean and Castiel were facing Raphael. And the other archangel was too fixated on his speech to even look away from Dean.

“…just decided to throw an apocalypse, while he was gone?”

“We are tired. We just want it to be over. We just want…paradise” 

“Oh Raphael” Azrael couldn’t hold back the whisper, that escaped his mouth. He had never seen his brother like this. That drew Raphael’s attention to him. But the moment was short lived, because Dean started talking again and the contained Archangel turned to the Hunter.

Azrael inhaled in shock. Did Raphael even know who he was? No sign of recognition had showed on his face. Azrael couldn’t think more about this topic, because in this moment Raphael caused the  
windows to burst in. Even though Raphael’s grace only felt like anger and desperation, Azrael bathed in the feeling of being near his little brother again.

Castiel started another desperate attempt.

“If God is dead, why have I returned? Who brought me back?”

“Did it ever occur to you, that maybe Lucifer raised you?” A Lightning illuminated the room.

“No”, but Castiels grace betrayed his words.

“Think about it. He needs all the rebellious angels he can find. You know it adds up”. Raphael was looking at Azrael while he said that, and a nasty expression remained on his face.

“Let’s go” Castiel turned around and froze in front of Azrael. Dean pulled out the same Angel blade Azrael had been already threatened with today. But he ignored the two. Azrael had only eyes for Raphael. He pushed Castiel aside and took a step in Raphael’s direction.

“Don’t you know me, brother?” He didn’t let the lump in his throat influence his behavior. Not once had it occurred to him, that his brother wouldn’t recognize him. It was only plausibly, if you thought about it. Last time he had seen them, they had been mere fledglings in comparison to their age nowadays. But it hurt nevertheless. 

Raphael seemed like he wanted to say something, still the same expression wearing, when Azrael released his grace. A last attempt.  
Azrael heard a gasp coming from Castiel’s direction and Dean shot him a strange look. Raphael frowned and then looked taken aback. “Lucifer? You already found a vessel, as I can see”, his voice was full of disgust. 

The knot inside Azrael seemed to grow. Dean flinched beside him and gripped his blade tighter, till his knuckles stood out white. And Castiel’s whole body tensed, expecting to be attacked every minute. Azrael started talking again. “Think again brother. What happened to you?” His voice broke, barely a whisper only to be raised again. “I was gone, and then I finally return, and everything is in pieces. Lucifer, locked away by Michael. Gabriel disappeared!” Raphael flinched. Azrael could feel a short laugh escape his lips. Almost hysterical. “And you? You were supposed to be the healer! And yet, you slaughter innocent people!” Violent gestures supported his speech. “Even the mind of your vessel is a shadow of its former self.” Azrael couldn’t hold back his anger and confusion and the air seemed to still, sharp like razor blades and heavy from the emotions. The shadows in the corners crept up and the room got darker. The air tasted like Death. The power was unmistakable despite his injured grace.

Next to Azrael Castiel took a shaky breath and Dean’s hand trembled. The noises of the thunder outside silenced, and Raphael eyes showed recognition. “Azrael...” It was only a whisper. “We thought...” A swallow. “...we thought you were dead.” Suddenly a spark of life seemed to emerge from Raphael’s eyes. “This is fathers doing. He sent you here to help us with the Apocalypse.” He was like a child with his new awakened trust in god. He looked at Azrael. “With your help we can finally end it. Come with me. Michael will be thrilled. Come to Heaven” 

Azrael’s eyes widened in shock. Every feeling that had filled the room before retreated and got sucked back into Azrael. He took a step back and shook his head, the floorboards creaking. “No. I won’t help you to kill each other! The Apocalypse is not the solution. There has to be another way!” How could Raphael ask for something like that? “I do love you and Michael, but also Lucifer! I will not watch my family kill each other, let alone help you with this task!” Azrael would have been furious if he hadn’t felt like a deer that was hit by a truck. The next thing he said hurt but it had to be done. “Tell Michael, if he doesn’t change his mind about this, he won’t see me again. The same goes for you.”  
He couldn’t stand being here anymore. Azrael disappeared without another word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's the next chapter, so I hope you enjoyed it :)


	3. A new Ally (The end, Fallen Idols, The curious Case of Dean Winchester)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azrael finds the Winchesters. (Now both of them)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In my fanfiction, angel-wings are corporal but on another plane of existence, so humans can’t see or really feel them. The same one, where an Angel can hide from the human eye. In a vessel Archangels have 3 pairs of wings and a Seraph has 2 pairs of wings, ordinary angels 1 pair. That doesn’t occur to their true form, when they aren’t possessing someone. Like Zachariah is said to have 3 pairs of wings. In real angel lore Azrael is said to be the Angel of Death and described to have 12 wings and as much eyes and mouths as living people exist. I also think that Angels are more powerful in a vessel, because they can tap into the power of their hosts soul without the risk, that the human explodes and their energy is more compressed. But it’s up to you. If you don’t like this, just ignore my theory and put your own thoughts in place
> 
> Also this time I wrote 'thoughts' like this
> 
> So hopefully this time posting this picture works, I just don't know how to do it. Regarding the picture I drew, this is Azrael how I imagined him when I first started to write this fanfiction, but feel free to picture him how you like.

Chapter 3:  
(The End, Fallen Idols, The curious case of Dean Winchester)

Dean and Castiel drove away, shortly after Azrael had disappeared. They left the speechless Raphael inside the circle of holy fire, and Cas decided to continue his search for god. His belief now even more reinforced after their encounter with Raphael.  
The topic ‘Azrael’ was ignored in a very Winchester way. To quote Dean: „We can’t do anything against this guy anyways, as long as we don’t get new information, so why bother?“

While his true vessel successfully avoided this topic, a certain Archangel’s thoughts led in almost the same direction. After Raphael had reported to him, Michael dismissed his younger brother and thought about the news. 'Why would God bring Azrael back? His father had left. Why should he care? No', he thought, while watching earth unblinkingly. His grace pulsing with heavy emotion, betraying his emotionless expression. 'It made no sense. Azrael being back? That could not possibly be the truth. The ongoing Apocalypse and the absence of their father weighed obviously harder on Raphael, that he had originally imagined. It had been almost comically to watch. Raphael, desperately trying to keep up appearances, but his wings had twitched eagerly and his grace had shone bright with excitement, despite the bitter nature of the message. Michael had been suddenly reminded of better days, when Raphael had showed this side of him more often. Now, most of the time you could only see the hardened facade of a warrior... They all had changed. Was it really the right thing to do? Kill Lucifer, his brother? No he couldn’t have doubts! He would go on with the plan. This information would not change anything at the moment, it would simply be ignored. Zachariah would show his true Vessel the future he was leading towards, if he continued to refuse him. It was settled.'

Azrael was currently sitting on a sand dune. He didn’t know, why he landed in an Asian desert, but he just needed a place to think. And if you don’t have to eat and temperature doesn’t really bother you, a desert is an ideal place for this.  
He watched a little Lizard, who was sitting in his shadow. Suddenly every feeling came back to the surface. 'What were his brothers thinking?!' Azrael had the urge to punch something. 'To kill each other? That was now the solution? God was gone, and they didn’t know what to do. They didn’t like their current situation, but that didn’t mean it was okay to wipe out half of humanity. He had to admit, that Dean was right in a few points. Azrael could understand that his brothers were desperate. But how far they would go to change things…  
He would try to find Lucifer. Azrael had to talk some sense into him. And where the Hell was Gabriel! Why hadn’t he done something?' Now that he thought about it, Azrael hoped that he was still alive. 'God, what if Gabriel had killed himself?' A shiver ran down his spine. 'No. He wouldn’t do that. Azrael clung to that thought. His little brother was still out there. He only had to find him!'  
Azrael was watching the upcoming stars. It was a beautiful sight. He remembered a time, when there hadn’t been any.  
Now, that Azrael had calmed down a bit, he remembered and cursed himself for leaving so quickly. Obviously, every archangel took an interest in the Winchesters. They were his best lead to find Lucifer and he had thrown it away without a second thought. Azrael stood up and brushed the sand off his clothes. Then he stretched out his wings and took off.  
He hoped that Dean was still in Waterville, but there was no sign of him. The Impala was gone and so was Raphael, as he checked out the abandoned house. “Damnit”

Azrael searched the town, constantly cursing to himself, knowing that there was no sense in doing so. He had left hours ago. And as he searched for Castiel, he sensed him somewhere in South-America.  
Now that he was thinking about it, he hadn’t once met the younger Winchester. Where was he? Azrael knew, it could take ages to find the Winchesters again, but there was one person, who could know something. He expanded his Grace to find the one he was searching for.

He was standing in front of a sign that read “Singer Salvage Yard”. Azrael walked over to the house and rang the doorbell. After a short time, a gruffy looking man in a wheelchair opened. “Yeah?”

“Bobby Singer? I believe we haven’t met yet, but we spoke on the phone. William Romano.”

“I remember. Come on in boy” He rolled into the kitchen without looking at Azrael. “Want a drink?”

“Yeah why not”, Azrael said while he was looking at the house. Everywhere were books about the supernatural, and some half empty whisky bottles stood around. The sun was shining through the windows and you could see the dust floating in the air. Bobby came back and offered him a beer. Azrael took a sip. It was spiked with holy water.

“So, what brings you here?”, Bobby asked, still sounding a bit weary of him.

“Remember the first time we spoke? I was asking about the whereabouts of the Winchesters.”

“And you think I should know where they are?” Bobby opened a bottle of beer for himself now.

“Actually, I believe you do.”

“Why are you looking for them?”

“I need them to find a brother of mine”, Azrael said.

“And why do you need them, don't you know any other Hunters?”

“Because they are the center of attention right now. Every Angel is looking for them”

“And how would you know of these things?” Bobby let a hand wander to the gun laying on the table.

“I am an Angel myself” There was no use in denying this fact. Sooner or later Dean would have told him anyway.

“I surely will not help you to find them.”

Azrael looked at the man in front of him. “You know, at the moment every angel is able to find you if he wants. There are no wards and you aren’t hidden from their sights. Everybody could come in here and kidnap you. Maybe they aren’t as nice as me”

“Now you’re threatening me boy? You’ll have to do better than that.”  
“What I’m suggesting here is a trade. I could give you protection and you tell me where the Winchesters are.”

“If I wanted that I could have asked another angel. You get to know people in my business.” Bobby turned around and rolled away from the table.

“I could heal you” The other man stopped. After a moment he turned around to look at Azrael.

“You can offer me everything you want, but you sure ain’t getting anything from me” But Azrael was an Archangel. He didn’t need to torture someone to know what he was thinking. During the whole conversation he had watched Bobby’s mind closely. The man didn’t know where Dean was at the moment. But Sam. There was a place floating around in his thoughts. Garber, Oklahoma. “Well, it was worth a try. But you should really consider warding off your house Mr. Singer.” Azrael saluted smirking, and with a flap of wings, he disappeared. Left behind was only a confused Hunter.

Azrael had arrived in Oklahoma some time ago. But Sam was nowhere to be found. He asked all kinds of people and after two days a girl named Lindsay could help him. She said a mysterious guy named Keith had worked with her. One day a few guys, hunting friends, as they called themselves showed up. She didn’t say very much about the incident, but it was clear that they called Keith, Sam. But he had already left the town. Luckily, Lindsay was able to give him Sam’s phone number.  
Azrael thought about calling Sam, but he couldn’t get Gabriel out of his head. The thought, that he might be dead clung to his mind. He decided, that he would go looking for him. He had to be somewhere.  
He searched the world for over a month, but the only discovery he made, was, that Michael seemed to still support the Apocalypse and that nobody had heard from Gabriel. Nor the Demons or the Angels seemed to know something. Azrael was frustrated. Maybe he should call Sam Winchester, or search for a case. Anything that would distract him from this useless quest.  
Back in America, he rang up the younger Winchester.

“Yeah?”, a voice answered.

“Sam Winchester?”

“Yes, who is there?”

“I already met your brother, my name is Azrael.”

There was silence, then Sam asked: “What do you want from me?”

“Well, I’d like to work with you and your brother” „And probably punch him for trying to kill me“, obviously this part, he didn’t mentioned out loud.

“And why exactly should we agree?”

“Because I am the best chance you have, to stop Lucifer and Michael from destroying half of humanity, and your angel definitely owes me one.“

Silence. “We’ll think about it”, said Sam. Then he hung up. Well, Azrael would have to wait.

In the meantime, Dean finished a phone call with Bobby about the witch they were hunting. “We should check out a few bars, hey what’s up with you?” Dean looked at Sam.

“I just received a phone call.”

“Who was it?”

“The Angel you told me about. Azrael”

“What did he want?”

“He said he wanted to work with us”

“You said no right? The Angels are Dicks! Except maybe for Cas” he quietly added after second thought.

“I said we would think about it”

“What?! We would think about it?? I stood in a room with him. Raphael thought it was Lucifer the first time, he saw him. Raphael. The Archangel! Why would we want to work with him? Beside that, don’t you think he could be a little bit angry after our last encounter?”

Sam bit his lip. “He said he could stop Michael and Lucifer from going through with the Apocalypse” Dean went silent. “I thought now there would be something like: “’and you believe that crap’ speech of yours” Sam said.

“I don’t like it Sam. I really don’t like it, but maybe he is right. He does know some things we don’t. Not even Cas knew who he was, when I asked him.”

“And what should we do now?”

While waiting for the Winchesters to answer, Azrael was sitting inside a lovely little café in Paris and observed the people. There was this guy sitting on his Laptop. Every few minutes, he tapped on the table with his fingers. Azrael didn’t think that he noticed what he did. Maybe he wrote a book or something. Then there was a young woman, wearing a really pink scarf. She had finished her Coffee and was waiting for the waitress to come back, so that she could pay. At the moment, she was trying to fold a paper plane out of her napkin. A laughing couple sat right next to her. In this moment his phone started ringing. The man on the laptop looked up startled and felt for his own phone, till he realized it wasn’t his. “Yes?”, Azrael said.

“If you still want to work with us, you can meet us” Sam told him the name of a motel. Azrael snapped up a bit of money and put it next to his empty coffee cup. Then he disappeared.  
It was easy to find the Winchesters, once he knew where they were. He landed in a Motel room. The brothers were standing next to each other. Sam was still putting his phone away. Azrael looked around and noticed the circle made out of oil on the floor, he was standing next to. He raised an eyebrow. „If you hadn’t stabbed me at our last encounter, I would probably have done you the favor and stepped inside.“ His light tone wasn’t able to hide his true feelings completely. While his grace was healed, he still felt the place where he had been hit. He wouldn’t be so careless this time. With a snap of his fingers the oil vanished.

“Why would you want to help us?” Sam asked while Deans fingers twitched around the knife he was currently holding.

“Straight to the business. No small talk? No one mentioning the weather?” Azrael said while pointing with the head to the window.

“Well you did now.” Dean said.

“Touché. But let’s be honest.“, Azrael said now seriously. “I am your best chance to stop the Apocalypse. I have knowledge and power over Lucifer and Michael every other Angel could only dream about.” Well he hoped that was still the truth.

Dean now slowly circled him. “Almost every Angel we met in the past wanted the Apocalypse. What makes you different?”

“For one, I don’t think that killing millions of people is a solution or otherwise somehow justified. And second, I don’t want my brothers to fight till death or to fight at all. They all have changed since I last saw them.”

“Are you able to get rid of Lucifer and Michael?” Dean asked.

Azrael tilted his head. Slowly he said. “I probably have the power to kill them both. That’s true. But I won’t.” No use in denying that.

“How are you able to help us then?” the older Winchester wanted to know. He had stopped in front of Azrael.

“I will do everything to stop them from continuing what they are doing now. But killing is out of question” he said while looking Dean firmly in the eyes.

Sam had been very quiet but now he asked another question. “All the time you say that Michael and Lucifer are your brothers, but you don’t say it like Cas. You mean it right? They are your brothers. You are an Archangel, aren’t you?”

Azrael grinned. “Ah yes, and thats why everybody thinks you are the smart one huh?”

“How is it then”, Dean asked with a frown, “That everybody seemed to forget to mention this little piece of information?”

Azrael had felt the air shift, and so, unlike the Winchesters, he wasn’t surprised, when another voice joined them. “Because nobody knew it”

“Except for the really old angels. Hi Castiel by the way.” Azrael smiled coldly at the young one. „You know, I owe you at least a very hard punch in the face.“

“You prayed?” Sam mouthed, looking at Dean, who only shrugged and then ignored his little brother. The Angel in the Trench coat stared at Azrael. Unbeknownst to the humans the Archangel had raised his wings threateningly. Almost immediately the Seraph lowered his, yielding to the power of Azrael’s grace. He wouldn’t dare to attack him again. Azraels feathers puffed out proudly.

Dean took a step forward, unconsciously shielding Castiel, as if he had noticed the tension, while Sam asked angry but calm: “Why didn’t we know, that there is another Archangel? And if you wanted to stop this goddamn Apocalypse, why didn’t you do anything against it before all of this happened?”

“Well. I wasn’t exactly here, till the Apocalypse started.” Azrael said lowering his wings into a neutral position.

“Where have you been?” Castiel asked carefully, now not being threatened anymore.

“You could say, that me and my father, we had a disagreement a long long time ago, and he decided, to leave me on my own.” No, he didn’t sound bitter at all, Azrael thought sarcastically.

The little Angel took a step forward. “Do you think he’s alive?” Castiel asked his grace lightening up hopefully and ignored the brothers who were talking silently behind his back.

“God? Yeah. He’s out somewhere. But if he doesn’t want to be found, you won’t find him. Personally, I think he just doesn’t care.” Castiel swallowed.

“You clearly wanted to work with us. Why?” Sam asked.

“Isn’t it obvious?” Azrael said. “You two are the center of this whole thing. Every single brother of mine is interested in you two, and in favor of them I will even overlook the little assassination-attempt on me, your brother and Castiel started.“

“We have to talk about it.” 'Oh sure. Always talk and think about it' , Azrael thought. The trio left the room. 'As if that would give them some privacy.' Azrael was a damn Angel. With Angel hearing. He could still follow the conversation. After five minutes of ranting about how dangerous he was and how stupid the idea of working together was, Cas argument, of how useful it would be, to have an Archangel on their side, still held the most weight and the Friends decided, to give it a try.  
They entered the room again, this time without any weapons in their hands. “So”, Sam started, breaking the awkward silence. “How is this going to work now?”

“If I interpreted this the right way, we are a team now?” Azrael said, only to be met with silence. He sighed. “Well I say everybody just continues with what he is doing and if you guys need me, you can call me or send a short prayer. That goes for all of you.” Azrael looked at Cas. “Maybe I’ll pay a visit when I’m bored and if there is any sign of one of my brothers, contact me.” It was better to leave the brothers alone for a little bit to let the information sink in. He could always ask his questions later.

“That, we can do” Dean added. They exchanged phone numbers and Azrael was about to fly away - he would continue his search for Gabriel - when he changed his mind. “Heya Castiel, care to join? How about a little race?” The other Angels face lit up. Well, as much as Castiels face showed emotion. But a little smile appeared.

“A race? For real?” Dean asked seemingly confused. The little Angel turned around to talk to him.

“When I was a young Angel we often played these kinds of games. But when we were trained to be soldiers and heavenly warriors, this was a rare occurrence. And now there is the Apocalypse. Every Angel I know sees me as a traitor.” Dean now looked a bit guilty. Azrael decided to intervene.

“But I have to warn you. I am very fast” He smiled.

“I would gladly accept”, Castiel said. They took off.

There is a great difference between flying if you are an Angel, or if you are a human, who is transported by an Angel. In one beat of wings you can close the distance from one part of the world to another. While a human mind can’t process this kind of travelling, an Angel feels every moment of it. While flying, an Angel is, even if he is wearing a vessel, more Grace than everything else. But the kind of race Azrael meant was more challenging. If you reduced the support of grace and used only your Wings, you were much slower. You were more vulnerable, but also it was a lot of fun. But Azrael was an Archangel. No one would dare to attack them and if somebody was this stupid, he wouldn’t survive very long if Azrael decided to end their life.  
To be fair, Azrael only used two of his wings to match the ones of the younger Angel. Without a goal in mind they flew side by side. Once he held the lead, another time the other one. The chased each other through the planes. Azrael could feel a laughter rise up in his chest. When was the last time he had so much fun? This little Angel also seemed to lose some of the tension, which had rested inside him. And so, they continued. They flew without purpose, only for the sake of flying.  
As they landed, they found the Winchesters in their room. Sam was reading in an old looking book and Dean was on the Laptop. He looked up when he heard them. Now the two Angels stood there, breath catching and smiling. Azrael sat down on a bed and leaned against the headboard.

“You two had fun playing?” Dean asked.

Cas was about to respond but Azrael was faster. “Actually yes.” He said grinning, while snapping up some French-fries.

Dean was sitting there, dumbstruck. “Can you do this with every kind of food?”

“Why? You want some?” Azrael said, waving with the fries, while he was grinning smugly.

“I believe, he wanted to ask you, if you are able to snap pie out of thin air” Sam said amused.

Azrael answered by doing so, and now there was a Cherry-pie standing in front of Dean, next to the Laptop. “Awesome”

“And what are you going to do now. Still searching for God?” Sam asked Cas, while he frowned looking at the snapped up pie as if it reminded him of something.

“I don’t know. Azrael said I wouldn’t find him. While I don’t really believe that", he said, with a pointed look in Azraels direction, "we now have an Archangel on our side. At the moment there is no necessity to find God”

“Then stick with us” Dean said with a full mouth, pointing with a plastic-fork at Castiel.

“I would like that”, said the young Angel, a smile tugging at his lips.

Azrael let the leftover fries disappear, stood up and rubbed his hands. “So, if you wouldn’t mind, I have things to do, places to be”

“Where are you going?” asked Sam.

“I am searching for my brother, but don’t hesitate to contact me if you need help or get some information”

Azrael flew away and continued his search for Gabriel in India, where he had left before he contacted the Winchesters. Well, it would have been nice to stay, but he would check on them later. In the meantime, Azrael wouldn’t sit around. He could continue to search for Gabriel. He sighed as he walked through a market. The people around him bargained about various goods. From fabric and spices to every-day-items. It was good to finally cooperate with the Winchesters. But here was he now. Again, searching for Gabriel. Azrael knew there was no use looking for him. He knew that after the first month. It would have been easier to find Lucifer. If he was honest with himself, he was a bit afraid of meeting Lucifer again. Maybe he should go after him, but nothing spoke against relaxing and enjoying the Indian hospitality for a few days, right? He healed a few people and animals. Simple things. Nothing that would have caused to much attention and walked the streets of busy cities, like Bangalore, New-Delhi, Jaipur and many more.

It couldn’t have been more than two days, when a prayer reached him. The almost modest voice of Dean Winchester. “Hey Azrael, hope you got your ears on. I just wanted to ask one thing. Cas said he couldn’t do it, cause he’s currently cut off from Heaven, but you are an Archangel, so… I dunno if you know this guy? Grumpy old man named Bobby Singer. Are you able heal him? Just take a look at him and do your Angel mojo or what you guys use.” Then the voice fell silent.

Azrael pulled out his phone. 'Stupid guys. How should he know where they were?' The second the call was picked up, Azrael started talking. “You know, if you would have told me, where you are at the moment, I wouldn’t have to call you from India” “Which is by the way not very cheap” he added.

“Just stop bitching around we are still at the same place wh…” Dean didn’t have to finish his sentence because Azrael was now standing directly in front of him. Actually, this time, it was not in the Motel room, but the parking lot in front of it. Sam was helping Bobby to put some thing inside of a rusty car, and Castiel was standing silently next to Dean.

“Goddamnit. There we have the second one, who doesn’t know what personal space is.” Dean cursed after he recovered from his shock. Cas didn’t look very guilty when Dean shot him a look.  
Azrael only grinned.

“To come back to your friend Bobby, we already met. I actually did offer to heal him, in exchange for your whereabouts, but he wouldn’t tell me”

“So, you are able to heal him” Dean stated.

“Yes, but I don’t think it would be wise to approach him on my own. I won’t underestimate the wrath of Bobby Singer” Azrael said amused while looking at the old man who hadn’t noticed his arrival till now.

Even Dean showed a little smile. “That is smartest thing, I have ever heard an Angel say. No offence Cas”, he added.

“None taken” said Cas seriously.

Azrael smiled at the little Angel. “Actually”, he turned back to Dean, “a Hunter once warned me to never get on his bad side”

“How do you get to know Hunters?”

Azrael wasn’t able to answer, because in this moment Bobby’s voice interrupted them. “What is this guy doin’ here?

Dean turned around. “He is here because I asked him to heal you”

“We work together now”, said Azrael smirking.

Bobby looked at Dean. “This is not because of the talk we had earlier”

“Nope. We decided to give our cooperation a try two days ago”, intervened Azrael before Dean could even open his mouth. Sam was now also walking in their direction. He greeted Azrael with a short nod.

Bobby was now looking from Sam to Dean. “Wait. This is that goddamn Archangel you were talking about?”

“If that isn’t Blasphemy” muttered Azrael amused under his breath. “Well do you want me to heal you now or not?” There was no answer, so he took it as a yes and Azrael stepped forward and put his hand on Bobby’s forehead. He searched with his grace and found the place, where the nerves had to be knitted back together. Bobby inhaled sharply as he healed him.

“And did it work?” asked Sam, the tension almost visible in the air. Slowly the man in the wheelchair tried to lift one leg. It worked. Bobby stood up laughing while the Winchesters also started to smile.

“Well then. Let’s stop that frigging Apocalypse”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the ones, who are wondering what talk Bobby is referencing to. This chapter takes place during the episode in which Bobby and the Winchesters encounter the witch, wich gambles for years. And Bobby is talking to Dean, how he is already old, and no longer needed and so on. And Dean remembers that Azrael could probably heal Bobby. I'm also curious if you would like to see more interaction between the Winchesters and Azrael or and if you would like to read something from their perspective. Just let me know in the comments! 
> 
> Also, there will probably be some more tags, I don't know if I will include some more characters while the story is in progress, but I really think, that Crowley will make an appearance and maybe Anna? At the moment I'm trying to get some subplot in here, so hopefully Ellen and Jo will find a place there too.
> 
> Ps. Thanks for the comments and Kudos, I am always glad when somebody gives me a review of my story! Let me know what you think, I am open for critique or suggestions regarding my writing, or the story. (If I like it maybe I'll include it, maybe not) :)


	4. Lost and Found (Inbetween and Changing Channels)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azrael gains more knowledge of the Apocalypse and meets a certain Trickster.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I don't really know what to think about this chapter. This time I wrote a bit out of Sam's pov and also Dean's. Let me know what you think, and also I hope that I got Gabriel right. I didn't really know at first how to introduce him, but I figured that he isn't all the happy guy he pretends to be and so I tried to write a bit about what he feels about all this. And also I adjusted some of the rules regarding true vessels. Hope you'll like it.

Chapter 4: (Inbetween and Changing Channels)

Sam sighed. He was sitting in front of his Laptop, searching for a case. He had nothing else to do. The cheap motel-chair creaked, as he stretched. His long legs bumping against the unsteady table. „Shit“ Only his good reflexes prevented the cup next to his Laptop from spilling coffee all over his keyboard. Dean was out somewhere. Probably at a bar or something. He should have taken Deans offer and gone with him. But his brother was sulking. There were no other words for his behaviour. Dean would never admit it. Hell, he probably didn’t even realize it. But since Cas had left them again, Dean was in a sour mood.

Three days ago, Bobby had been healed by their new ally. Azrael hadn’t stuck around for long. While it sounded awesome to have an Archangel on their side, Sam didn’t trust it. Why should they, all of a sudden, be that lucky? His whole story seemed just to suspicious! And while Sam had suggested it first, they had no proof, that he actually was an Archangel. The only thing, they knew for sure, was, that Raphael had known him, and that he was powerful. More powerful than an average Angel or maybe even a Seraph according to Castiel. Okay, and Cas had never heard of an ordinary Angel surviving a fatal wound of an Angel-blade. Dean had suggested, that maybe, it was some kind of mojo or trick. Nobody had really believed that, but still. It just sounded so absurd. Well, even if he was really an Archangel, that didn’t mean, that he wasn’t Lucifer in disguise or some kind of spy for Michael. They needed a backup plan.

And that led to their current situation. He was sitting alone in front of his laptop, in favor of not having to deal with a miserable brother. And Dean, who only was this moody, because Castiel was out, searching for the Colt. If something could kill the Devil, it had to be this weapon. They really couldn’t do anything other, than search for a hunt. Sam stopped in his scrolling. This could be something. Two body’s found dead. Some guy stabbed his wife twenty-two times, and then killed himself. Could be demonic activities , could be nothing. It was worth a try. Better than sitting around and doing nothing at all.

 

Turned out, it was nothing. No supernatural activities at all. No sulfur at the crime scene, no EMF. For a week, they had checked out every detail. The only thing they found, was a suspiciously good looking yoga teacher and some very graphic photos in an anonymous chat-room. „Just a ordinary murder“, as Dean put it so nicely. „Not our division.“

 

Both Winchesters were currently seated inside the black Chevy Impala, driving through the night. The familiar smell of leather and home in his nose, Dean hummed slightly, drumming in time with the rock song, that was playing. Run through the Jungle, by Creedence Clearwater Revival, if he was right. And he usually was right concerning this topic. Dean shot Sam a quick glance. His brother had been very quiet since they'd decided to leave the town this morning. „Hey, these guy will solve the case on their own. Don’t worry.“, he said, in an attempt to cheer Sam up.

„It’s not that.“, his brother answered sighing.

„What is it then? You look, like you accidentally killed Bambi.“

„What?“

„Just sayin’. You just seem to be in a bad mood.“, Dean said, looking at his brother.

Sam snorted at that. He made a short pause before he answered, his smile disappearing. „You know... These people. Sometimes I just don’t get them. Why would a guy kill his wife, when he finds out, that she has an affair? Is this normal reaction? We don’t even question it anymore. We just drive away and say that this isn’t our business.“

„Yes, and it isn’t our business. And as often, as we pretend to be Feds, we aren’t. This isn’t our job and you know it. Come on. You’ve seen countless of this stuff. Almost every case we investigate, which turns out to be nothing is something like this. What is this really about?“ A sigh from Sam. He looked at his brother and then again at the dark road. The song had now switched to Dream on by Aerosmith, Dean noticed.

„Sometimes I almost think he’s right. Not with the ‘destroying all of humanity’ plan“, Sam added quickly, „but... we are flawed. Humans I mean. There is so much evil in the world. Not only ghosts, werewolves or demons. Ordinary people. Like this guy, who killed his wife.“ Sam made a short pause and looked at Dean again. „Sometimes, I think, that we are hunting the wrong monsters.“ Deans hands had tensed around the steering wheel, knuckles almost white.

„Did you see him in your dreams again? He wants you as his vessel Sam! He tries to manipulate you!“ „Don’t you think I know that Dean!? But Lucifer... he, he seems almost desperate sometimes. Like he sees no other way.“ Dean opend his mouth to say something, but in this moment Sam’s phone started to ring. He looked at Dean, who shot him a quick „This-istn’t-over“-look, and then answered the call.

„Yeah? Mh.“ Sam turned towards Dean. „What was this town called again, the one we passed?“

Dean perked up at that. „Lockridge, I think. Why? Is it Cas?“ Sam just shook his head.

„We’re in Iowa, just passed Lockridge, shortly after Fairfield.“ Sam listened to the other caller. „Mmh, 34. Yeah“

The distant flutter of wings was the only warning he got, and just like that, they had another passenger. Dean looked in the rear-view mirror. The black-haired Archangel sat there on the backseat smirking, his bright gray eyes staring directly in his. „Did I interrupt something? You seem... tense“

„What do you want?“, Dean asked roughly. ‘Perfect timing’, he thought sarcastically.

„Oh, so I did interrupt something huh?“ Azrael said. Dean could hear a trace of amusement in his voice.

„He said, that he was going to drop in sometimes Dean“ Sam interfered, probably trying to calm him down.

„That’s true. But actually, your brother is right. I do want something from you“, the Archangel said directed at Sam. Dean didn’t like it.

„And what would that be?“ Dean asked the angel. ‘That was typical. Was there one person on earth, that didn’t need something from them? Be it, to be someones vessel or to find something or keep a seal from breaking... If this flying Dick wanted to use them the same way as Heaven last year, Dean was so going to end this arrangement. Archangel or not.’

„Information.“

‘Well that was kinda unexpected.’ „About what?“, the hunter asked.

„The Apocalypse. I need to know everything that you know.“

„We probably don’t know anything more than you do.“ Sam said.

„Well, it’s worth a try!“ Azrael added.

Dean and Sam exchanged a look. ‘Oh no, he would not do the talking. At least Sam seemed to see that too. With a sigh, his brother started to tell the story.

Half an hour later, the whole tale was told, and the angel was sitting on the backseat quietly. Apparently thinking about what was said.

„And you said Lucifer appears in your dreams?“ Azrael asked Sam. Dean visibly tensed at that.

„Yeah, he wants me to say yes. To be his vessel.“ Sam answered.

„But he already has one?“ Azrael asked again.

„Yes. The guy’s called Nick. Probably didn’t know what he was getting into“

„But that’s stupid. He doesn’t really need you then. Well, he probably would be stronger if he used you, but if he already has a vessel...“

„What does that mean?“

„Few people are able to hold an archangel, but if you find someone like that, you usually don’t need another one. You two are called true vessels, because you are perfect for that particular angel. You don’t need to be changed or improved. But if he would just invest a few weeks, he could make his current vessel suitable for his needs.“ the archangel explained.

„You mean it could contain him, without exploding?“

„It wouldn’t exactly explode. More burn up, but yes. It would. So the question is, why is he after Sam?“ Azrael said. Dean thought about it.

„Well you said he is stronger if he uses me“ Sam said.

„And“, the older Winchester added, „He probably thinks, that he has the time to convince Sam to be his vessel. After all, Michael still possesses nobody. At least not to our knowledge.“

„That’s the point!“ Azrael said. Dean was now confused. A glance to the right showed him, that Sam also didn’t seem to have a clue.

„I don’t get it“ his brother voiced, what they both were thinking.

„Even if Lucifer isn’t possessing his true vessel, he still has one. At the moment he is probably twice as strong as Michael. It would be the perfect time to attack. Objectively spoken. But why is he sitting around and trying to convince you to be his vessel? And he hasn’t really threatened you, or tried to force you to do it, or has he?“ The angel almost sounded exited.

„You think he is waiting for Michael to gain a vessel?“ Sam asked.

„Yes. I don’t think he really wants to kill Michael, or at least, he wants him to have a fair chance. Maybe he isn’t as keen on having the Apocalypse as everybody always think he is. I have to talk to him.“

„A Dr. Phil session with the Devil. Sounds great!“ Dean muttered. Probably not the best thing to say, judging by the glare he received from Azrael, and the temperature drop inside of the car. But luckily the Angel seemed to be to ecstatic about his new discovery, to be really angry.

„What is Cas doing by the way? Again searching for God?“ The Archangel asked to break the awkward silence.

‘Well shit. Telling Azrael that Cas was currently searching for a weapon to murder his brother was certainly not the best way to answer his question.’ But Sam quickly interrupted his thoughts.

„Why are you asking?“ his brother said, directed at Azrael. Dean watched the Archangel in the rear-view mirror.

„Well, cause I can sense him...“, Azrael stopped mid-sentence, and tilted his head. Such a little gesture that reminded him painfully of his Angel. He missed Cas. He should have long checked in again. Wait. What was he thinking? His angel? Dean promptly shook his head to get rid of the strange thoughts. „...in Brazil“, ended Azrael his sentence.

„He’s investigating a trace. Some Demons talking, you know“ Sam said quickly. Not the best excuse he could have come up with, but the Angel seemed to believe it.

„Well, I’ll have an eye on him, if he needs help. If you see him first, tell him I said hi“ And with that Azrael disappeared. Once again only with his brother in the car, Dean couldn’t get around noticing, while, even if Azrael was now more likely to find out what they were doing behind his back, a great deal of tension had left him at the thought, that somebody was looking out for Cas.

And if his mood had improved during the next few days, nobody was there to complain. Certainly not Sam, even if wondered what had caused that change.

 

It may have been a few weeks give or take, when a prayer reached him. While he held his eyes open for Lucifer, Azrael had still not given up on finding Gabriel and sometimes even Castiel joined him. Apparently, the younger Angel searched for something, but couldn't find it. Azrael didn’t push. If the Angel didn’t want to tell him, it was not in his right to ask. Probably, he was searching for God again. The killing-attempt aside, the little Angel was a welcome company. He had also apologized for stabbing him. And Azrael, even if he would never admit it, liked the younger Angel. It reminded him of the old times, when he was never without company of a brother. Also the Archangel seemed to soothe his ache of being cut off from the heavenly host, the younger one felt everyday in his grace. Anyways, the Angel of Death listened up when he heard the angelic voice of Castiel ringing through his head and telling him, that he needed some help. Azrael searched for him and took off.

As he found the younger angel and he didn’t seem to be in a very good shape. „What happend to you?“ Azrael asked, while healing Castiel.

„After I left you a few days ago, I was searching for Dean and Sam, but as I called them nobody answered. I asked Bobby about their last known location and that led me to Welllington, in Ohio. Eventually, I found an old warehouse, that pulsed with energy. A powerful spell twisted the reality behind these walls. Luckily I could get through and found Dean and Sam, but as I wanted to get them out of there, I was thrown back by a Trickster. My second attempt also failed. This Trickster is more powerful than a regular demigod should be. I don’t even think, that it is a Trickster anymore.“

„Show me where“ They took flight and stopped in front of the warehouse Castiel had mentioned. That was indeed some powerful magic. Something felt familiar to Azrael. But the moment, he started to examine the strange magic, most of it dissolved. A powerful beat of his wings later he stood inside of the building, smelling the dust swirling in the air and on the dark concrete. Castiel followed shortly after. His arrival whirling up only more dust.

The sight that greeted him was confusing. The „Trickster“ captured inside a circle of holy fire and the Winchester brothers standing in front of it, currently having a conversation. „Where’d I screw up?“ the demi-god said, paying no attention to the two angels beside a short glance as if they didn’t matter anyway. Azrael was still hiding most of his grace to escape the attention of Michael and Raphael, so he didn’t think, that this Trickster would recognize him as an Archangel.

„You didn’t. Nobody gets the jump on Cas like you did.“, Sam said.

„Mostly it was the way you talked about Armageddon.“, the older Winchester added. As Azrael was watching the three beings, he found, that there was something off about the Trickster. He felt familiar but he couldn’t really point it out. Maybe his eyes, that shone bright with inhumanly power. This particular colour. He knew it. Azrael was sure, that this being was something else entirely.

„Meaning?“, the short guy asked.

„Well, call it personal experience, but nobody gets that angry unless they’re talking about their own family.“ Dean said.

„So which one are you? Grumpy, Sneezy or Douchey?“ Sam asked.

„Gabriel, okay? They call me...“, he stopped mid sentence when he first examined the newcomers closer.

„Gabriel“ ended Azrael the sentence for him. It was so obvious. Why hadn’t he seen it before? While his grace had been hidden all the time, the whole thing had pointed towards his younger brother. The Trickster/Archangel’s eyes widened slightly.

„How... ?“ he murmured under his breath.

„Remember me?“ Azrael said, a uncertain smile on his lips. He snapped his fingers and let the holy oil disappear. The flames surrounding Gabriel vanishing with it.

„Azrael?“ Said Angel didn’t know what to do. Gabriel’s grace, that had been hidden till now, was bubbling to the surface. The typical feelings of warmth and home and fierce righteousness that had always made out Gabriel were now dull, but still there, burning hot in his core. Where you always had felt a spark of pure energy and family, sadness had taken over, only lit up by a tiny pulse of hope and happiness. Like the laughter of children. Azrael did the only thing he could think of. The Archangel let his wings brush against Gabriel, his grace washing over his little brother, in an attempt to comfort him. An angelic hug, so you could say. They both stood in silence, their grace mingling for the first time in eons. Curiously poking at the other one, examining and touching. Azrael could feel and see the strange parts of pagan magic. Golden veins running through him, that were now a part of Gabriel, that hadn’t existed back then. But while he had been busy taking all of Gabriel in, Azrael had almost forgotten the Winchesters. Castiel, who could see what they were doing, being an angel and all this stuff, was polite enough to not interrupt. Sam and Dean on the other hand, stood there confused, and while they might knew, that the two archangels hadn’t seen each other for a long time, they didn’t possess the patience of and angel. At least not Dean.

„When you’re all done with your strange staring contest, can we move to a more comfortable place?“, the older Winchester asked.

„Oh yeah, because we know no one, who does that all the time“ Azrael heard Sam mutter under his breath, so silent, that probably only the Angels had heard him. Azrael shot Dean a look.

„He’s kinda right“, said Gabriel shrugging, but grinning lightly at what Sam had said. „We have a lot to talk about.“

 

Back at Bobby’s, on insistence of the Winchesters, they were now standing in the kitchen of the older Hunter. Dean had promptly headed towards the fridge, to get some beer, while Sam had made it his mission to tell Bobby what he knew, and to keep him from shooting any of the sudden visitors. Castiel stood in silence, watching the two archangels. Gabriel let himself fall onto the nearest chair, when Azrael started talking.

„What happened?“, Azrael asked. „Back then mean? Why did you disappear?“

Gabriel snorted. „Why? Because of their fighting, that’s why! Michael and Lucifer, they didn’t care anymore. Lucifer changed after you were gone. Hell, we all changed. But it was different. You knew him and Michael. You know how Lucifer was. When Dad told us to love the humans, to love them more than him, I think that broke him a little bit. I think, he was jealous of them. He’d lost you, he couldn’t lose another part of his family. Even if it was just losing the first place in Dad’s heart to the humans.“ Azrael listened with a stoic expression, but his grace told another story. Emotions swirling around him, not prepared for the sadness and anger Gabriel was radiating everywhere at the moment. „I don’t know what exactly he told Michael, but he wanted his support in this. But Michael, always the good son, didn’t agree with him. And that was the moment it all got heavy.“ Gabriel made a pause, swallowing hard to hold back tears. Even he couldn’t control his vessel anymore. Or he simply didn’t care enough at the moment.

„Where was Father in all this? Why didn’t you stop it?“ Azrael asked, ignoring the others, that were listening to their conversation.

„Why didn’t I stop it?!“ Gabriel jumped out of his chair, fury in his eyes. Luckily, Castiel was smart enough to read the signs and he grabbed Bobby and the Winchesters and got them out of the house. Not a second later the windows burst in. „You have no right to ask me this! Don’t you think I tried?! You weren’t there! It wasn’t like I disappeared the first time, they had a disagreement!“ Gabriel had raised his golden wings threateningly.

Azrael took a step forward, anger flaring up, the shadows behind him growing. „I get it wasn’t easy for you! But you can’t hold this against me, brother! I would have been there, if it wasn’t for Dad!“ Azrael said, the floor cracking underneath, his shadowy wings rising high above his head. At that, Gabriel let out an almost hysterical laughter. „What?!“ Azrael snapped, confusion mixing with his anger.

„Hah, I forgot how alike you and Lucifer are sometimes. Yeah, blame it on Daddy, why not? That doesn’t change the fact, that you weren’t there. I spent years watching Michael and Lucifer fight. Years! And that wasn’t everything. Me and Raphael? If we tried to stop them, they just ignored us. The only time, we were able to talk to them, was, when they needed somebody to listen to their complaints about the other. We didn’t care who would win. We had to deal with this too. Raphael went apathetic, and me? I tried so hard to fix it! To get us to be a family again! But one day, I had enough. I didn’t see the point anymore. Why trying? They didn’t care anyways. So I left. Raphael didn’t stop me. He understood my motives, I think. Shortly after, Dad finally choose, that he couldn’t longer ignore what was going on, and Lucifer was locked up by Michael. And here we are! All of this starting again!“ Gabriel threw his hands up in frustration.

„No. I won’t let that happen.“ said Azrael, still shocked at Gabriels outburst.

„Do you really think you can change something?“ Gabriel asked Azrael. The anger gone, but a trace of uncertainty in his voice.

„Well, I’ll try. And you don’t really think, that killing each other is an option either, or do you?“

„Nah, but it seemed to be the only outcome. And then, why not getting over with it? Ripping it off, like a band-aid.“ Gabriel now snapped up some piece of candy and began chewing on it. „I think there is a chance that they will listen to you." He made a pause, chewing at his goody, swallowing it and promptly snapping up another one. "Now that we're acting civilised again, don’t you think we should let the others know that they can come in again? Unless you want to crush some more windows“

„Hey! I’m pretty sure that I had no part in that“, said Azrael in a fake offended voice. „Besides, we were pretty tame considering what we could have done...“ And if he thought about Michael having one of his fits, or Lucifer arguing with Raphael, he didn’t say it out loud.

 

Now, the house was flooded with the light of the setting sun. Dean was trying to learn Castiel some kind of card game and Sam watched them amused, sipping from his beer bottle. Bobby roamed through the kitchen, to get some more and the two Archangels sat a little offside.

Azrael would have remained standing, if it hadn’t been for Gabriel, who snapped up two of the most ridiculous looking armchairs he had ever seen. And Dean had made a point in saying, that if Gabriel didn’t change the 80’s-themed neon pattern, his eyes would probably start to bleed. The pink flowers that now decorated their seats weren’t much better, but Dean’s attention shifted and he stopped complaining, when Cas asked him, why there wasn't a card with the number eleven on it.

 

After Azrael and Gabriel had gotten everyone back in the house, and of course repaired the windows, the whole group had decided, that they could always make plans tomorrow. Today, the Apocalypse could wait. Gabriel and Azrael had sat in silence for most of the time, their wings slightly brushing, as if to remind them, that the other one was still there. Castiel had also lost most of the awkward tension, he had first shown, when he had realized, that he was in a room with two Archangels.

„What do you think?“ Gabriel pointed at Dean and Cas with his sucker. „Do you think that they will ever actually do something about this?“

„Huh?“ Azrael turned his head a little. Castiel was looking confused at his cards, while Dean desperately tried to explain why this card wasn’t the right one to play at the moment. Now Sam also seemed, as if he was trying to help.

„This was like the fourth time, they were simply staring at each other. Nothing more, only staring. It’s like a badly written soap-opera“ Gabriel said, and then putting his sucker once again into his mouth, as if to make a point.

„Yeah, Cas seems to like Dean.“ Azrael replied, now again looking at Gabriel.

„No, no. I mean like, like really _like_.“

Azrael turned around once more and watched them for a moment. The younger Angel looking at Dean, as he showed him the right card.

„I’ll bet with you, that they will get together one day. The loser owes the other one a favor“ Gabriel said mischievously.

„Hell no!“ Azrael turned, to face his brother. „Even if I were certain about this, I would never bet with you. You never lose, and you always ask for the most ridiculous things..“, he said smirking. „Ask the younger Winchester. Sam is probably more open to the idea of betting with you.“

„I will, if only for the look on his face. I haven’t even pulled a prank on them all day.“

„Oh, please. Don’t you think I didn’t notice, that the only reason Bobby is in the kitchen right now, is, that you snapped the beer back into the fridge for the third time ?“

„Touché. I’m wondering that Cassie hasn’t noticed yet.“ Said Angel seemed to have grasped the concept of the game, at least judging by the proud look on Deans face.

„Hell, I’m wondering that Bobby hasn’t thrown you out by now.“ Azrael answered.

„That’s, because he hasn’t noticed yet. Can’t trick the Trickster!“ Gabriel said smugly.

„But even he isn’t so stupid, to think, that he forgot to take the beer with him the next time.“

„Yeah, you’re probably right...“ Gabriel’s expression shifted from amused to thoughtful. „I wanted to ask you this the whole time already, but how did you get here exactly. We haven’t heard from you in decades and suddenly you pop out of thin air?“ Azrael frowned.

„I don’t really know. I remember living human lives. A lot of them. Men, Women... I just don’t remember how I regained my Grace.“

„Don’t you think, that maybe Dad could have something to do with it?“ Gabriel said carefully.

„Why would he? He doesn’t care“ Azrael said, his expression hardening. The ‘about me’ was left unspoken.

„Maybe he does. Maybe giving you back your memories and grace was his part in preventing the Apocalypse.“ Gabriel said.

„I don’t want to talk about it anymore“ Azrael answered and he stood up to take a beer from Bobby who just had returned. Azrael felt the Gabriel’s grace brushing against him in a comforting way. Begrudgingly he felt himself relax and instinctively reach back with his own. He sighed. Azrael missed the others. Hopefully Michael and Lucifer would listen to him and Gabriel. With that thought he sat down next to Sam. „Hey I was wondering, if you are you interested in a bet?“

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And as you all have noticed, Azrael has some Daddy-Issues but while Chuck made some mistakes he is not the bad guy in this, but Azrael's view on him isn't really the best at the moment. Also the next chapter will probably be a bit shorter than average, because I'm on vacation, so I don't know if I am able to write all time.


	5. Somewhere else

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The subplot is revealed. Kinda.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry! This chapter is like super-short. I don't think, that this are even two pages. I'll try to get at least the next chapter right.

Chapter 5:

(Inbetween)

He sat on his favorite chair, wearing an expensive Italian suit and staring into the rich colour of a none the less expensive scotch, which swirled around in the whiskey-glass, that he was currently holding. The rising of Lucifer concerned him. The four horsemen roamed the earth. Well, two of them. Death had yet to be released and War... After what his lackeys had told him, this one had encountered the Winchesters. And that had not ended well for him. Now Demons roamed the earth. Not that there weren’t any before, but now they simply didn’t care enough to be subtle. Slaughters, Storms, Earthquakes, whole towns corrupted. These were all signs for the increasing demonic activities.

He had kept his head down. Watched the happenings, and could only come to one conclusion. The Devil had to be killed. Lucifer would kill them all, if he would get to be in charge. But he wasn’t one of this stupid, brainless Demons, who blindly followed some kind of Archangel and believed every word he said. He was Crowley! He wouldn’t sit around and do nothing, no!

Since he came into possession of a certain weapon, he had left hints here and there, but these Winchesters still hadn’t realized one thing. Suddenly he felt an unearthly presence in his house. That should be impossible!

Not a second later, an Angel stood in the room facing him. Crowley put away his scotch and then faced the intruder. „And you are probably the reason, that my Wards are down." He examined the unwelcome visitor. "Forgive me, but I didn’t quite catch your name.“

„You can call me Anna. I heard, that you are in possession of something, that I need.“

For the last few month, Anna had searched for a way to stop Michael and Lucifer from destroying humanity. At least Michael would try to safe some of the humans. She wasn’t powerful enough to face Lucifer on her own. There was no way, that she could kill him. But she had heard of a weapon, that probably could. The colt. It was said to be able to kill anything. A weapon, that never failed. She had thought about killing Sam Winchester too, the true vessel of Lucifer. But there were rumors about another Angel, that was now on their side.

She knew Castiel, he was falling. Anna had a chance against him. But another Angel? This was an unknown element. She was a strong, but she knew nothing about the other Angel. As she listened to the Angels, they didn’t even talk about that, as if the didn’t know about it. Only some Demons seemed to know something. As she dug deeper, caught and interrogated some of the abominations, she didn’t find out much. Only, that they worked for someone called Crowley. The more Demons she caught, the more she found out. And that brought her here. The colt was in Crowley’s possession, and she needed it. She had found a naive Hunter, who was faithful enough to help her destroy the angel warding, on Crowley’s House. Afterwards, she had wiped his memory’s and flown him out of the state. No need for an innocent human to suffer, if she failed.

Now, she faced the Crossroads Demon for the first time. He didn’t seem to be afraid of her. „And what exactly would you need from me?“ he said, almost looking bored.

„The colt.“, she replied.

„The colt. Hmm, interesting. But even if I were in possession of such a weapon, which I am not. Why would I give it to you?“

„Because otherwise I will kill you, like the other filthy demons, that are now only rotting vessels on the ground.“

„But I’m not like them, am I?“ , said the demon and whistled.

A sudden dark growl let her attention shift towards the open door. It stood right there. A shadowy creature, as big as a small pony. Baring its teeth, drooling on the floor. Black and bony, nevertheless strong muscles flexing beneath the skin, ready to attack. It almost looked like it was made out of smoke, a faint trace of it swirling in the air every time it shifted. A Hellhound.

Anna had no doubt, that it was able to rip her apart. And not only her vessel. She turned to Crowley again. „I need it, to destroy Lucifer. And I will not hesitate to fight against you and the beast.“

The Demon leaned back in his chair to grab his whiskey-glass again. „Such a noble task“ he mocked. „But what makes you special? Why would you want to kill the Devil?“

„Humanity deserves better.“ She said with a firm voice, but they both knew, that she had no chance against this Hellhound in her current constitution. Anna was ready to react, should the Creature jump her.

„Well that is very nice, but I already said, I don’t have what you search. Now leave! Or Juliett will make you leave.“ Again a deep growl and the Hound took a step forward.

Anna looked at the Demon a last time, then she took off, the moment, the beast tried to jump her.

Crowley shook his head. ‘He would need to renew the wards and a few new underlings. And Bodyguards at his gate. He couldn’t allow something like this to happen again. An Angel in his House! And he hadn’t seen it coming! But this Angel was smart. She wouldn’t try to steal it from him, or would she?’, he thought while petting Juliett. ‘He would have given her the colt, her Grace had looked like she was falling, that she was betraying Heaven and its orders. But he had already decided. The Winchesters were a safe investment. At least they would get close enough to the Devil, without being killed.’, he thought, and swallowed the remains of his scotch.


	6. Never Have I Ever (Inbetween)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Betting, and a little bit of bonding over a drinking game.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a little chapter to give our main-characters a little break, before the whole making plans and facing the Apocalypse. This Chapter is like carving a way for Destiel. This ship gets more attention, that I originally assumed, but I love writing it!

Chapter 6:  
(Inbetween)  
When Dean encountered the Trickster for the first time, he hadn’t really thought about the guy. Well, he was different from every other supernatural being, they had seen before. And he was kinda funny, but otherwise, he was just another monster that had to be killed.  
The second meeting he couldn’t really recall. Sammy on the other hand, was probably traumatized from this experience. But Sam didn’t really talk about that. The only thing Dean noticed was, that since that day, his little brother harbored an inexplicably hate against Asia’s ‘Heat of the Moment’.  
The third time was probably the most memorable encounter, of all. Mainly, because Sam had to act the Herpexia-Advertisement.  
But who would’ve thought, that Loki was called Gabriel and that he was actually an Archangel?  
Well, at least Cas had seemed to suspect something.  
Cas. That was just another topic he couldn’t stop thinking about. Since the Angel was with them again, Dean caught himself thinking about his best friend. A lot. 

A few hours earlier: 

Dean looked at the Trickster, they had captured inside the ring of holy fire, when a light breeze and the distant flutter or wings informed him of the arrival of a certain Angel. The attention of the Trickster shifted also towards the newcomers, but it was only short-lived. He was too focused on him and Sammy. Dean’s anger at Loki’s apathy regarding the Apocalypse lessened, as he felt Castiel appear.  
It was funny, but Dean could swear, he knew when the Angel arrived, before he was even in the room. As if he knew, that Cas was approaching. Maybe it was because of their profound bond, or whatever Cas called it. But he wasn’t the only visitor.  
They continued to interrogate the Angel inside the circle, till he suddenly seemed to recognize Azrael.

It was strange, to see the Trickster that speechless. They were lucky, the Angel didn’t disappear, when the holy fire vanished.

While the two Archangels seemed to be occupied, Dean quickly checked Cas for injuries. When the Angel had vanished previously, he hadn’t been in his best shape. But apart from the the tie, that was always facing the wrong way, everything seemed to be in the right place.  
The Angel just smiled at him reassuringly and Dean felt a weight being lifted from his shoulders. As Cas turned to watch the Archangels, Dean continued to look at him.  
With his sharp cheekbones and the strong Jawline, he sometimes really seemed like a statue. For somebody, who didn’t know him, he would seem expressionless. No emotion showing on his face.  
But Dean could read the ever so slightly twitches and motions.  
The trenchcoat had gained a few more wrinkles. In the beginning, Dean hadn’t really noticed, but every so often, it would look, like it was freshly ironed. Cas really seemed to value this particular coat. At first, Dean couldn’t understand, why he would keep it, but now it was such a familiar sight, he didn’t think about it anymore. Even Cas’ stupid hair looked like he just flew through a tornado. He noticed, that he was smiling. Suddenly, Dean realized, that he had probably been staring for too long, and promptly looked away, a slight blush creeping up his face.  
Luckily, Sam didn’t seem to have noticed, Dean quickly watched Azrael’s and Gabriel’s staring-contest, to distract him from his own thoughts. 

After their arrival at Bobby’s house, Dean held back a laugh at Bobby’s reaction and his failed attempt to shoot them. Sam hurriedly walked over to the grumpy man and urged him to put the shotgun away. Dean quickly went into the kitchen, to get him some beer. That would hopefully calm him down a bit. As he came back, the two Archangels were already talking. Dean handed Bobby a beer, and silently offered Sam a bottle.  
After his brother declined with a shake of his head, he took a step back so that he stood next to Cas and opened his beer.  
Azrael stood there, listening to Gabriel, who was currently seated in one of Bobby’s shabby chairs.

„...jealous of them. He’d lost you, he couldn’t lose another part of his family. Even if it was just losing the first place in Dad’s heart to the humans. I don’t know what exactly he told Michael, but he wanted his support in this. But Michael, always the good son, didn’t agree with him. And that was the moment it all got heavy.“ Gabriel drove his hand through his hair, as he was talking. Dean had never seen the Trickster like this. All serious and emotional.

„Where was Father in all this? Why didn’t you stop it?“, the black haired Archangel asked. That was a mistake. Dean saw Gabriel jump out of his chair. Cas took a step forward. Suddenly the air felt thick and Gabriel’s eyes started glowing golden.

„Why didn’t I stop it?!“ The tension in the room grew. Dean quickly turned his head, when he felt a hand gripping his arm. 

„Wha...“ He wasn’t able to finish his sentence, because Castiel had already flown them out of the room. 

The world was spinning in front of his eyes. „What the hell?!“, he heard Sam say. Dean stumbled and gripped Cas shoulder to steady himself, the nausea slowly disappearing. Sam brushed some dirt of his clothes. Apparently he had been laying on the ground a few seconds ago. 

„Sammy, you okay?“ Dean asked, taking a step in his direction. Bobby also got on his feet, shaking his head. 

„Yeah, yeah. Where are we even?“ asked Sam. They stood on a field, in the middle of nowhere.

„I’m sorry“, Cas said. „We are still in the same state, if you wanted to know this. In this particular situation, it was the best solution to get away as quickly as possible, I didn’t really think about our destination.“

„We could use a warning next time“ Bobby said. 

„I’m sorry, I could only reach Dean to steady the flight. You two were too far away for me to react, in this short time-span.“

„My flight was steadied?!“ If this had been steady flying, he would need to have a serious talk with Cas... His stomach was still protesting! Bye, bye pooping for the next week. 

„You think, these two will flatten my house?“ Bobby asked concerned. 

„It is a possibility. If it’s only the house, we are lucky.“ Cas answered. Dean was only half listening, still lost in thoughts. He knew why he preferred driving to flying... Wait a second.

„Oh god.“ said Dean, a panicked look on face.

„Dean it’s Okay. Even if the house is going to be destroyed, it’s not your fault“, Bobby said, seemingly worried.

„Baby! It’s at the house isn’t it?“ Dean said not registering a word of what Bobby had said.

Sam couldn’t hold back his laughter. „It is still, in front of the warehouse Dean.“ Cas said reassuringly. „Nobody thought about bringing it with us, as we flew here. You don’t have to worry“ He patted Deans shoulder lightly, what made Sam only laugh harder. Dean didn’t pay it any attention, still recovering from the shock. Fuck Sam. This experience would haunt him in his dreams. Alone the image of a crashed Baby...

„Why don’t we wait somewhere else, till the two have figured out their family drama.“ suggested Sam.

„I need some alcohol.“ Dean said finally regaining his voice. Cas put his hand on their shoulders.

„But this time, without the falling part please.“ Bobby added and suddenly they found themselves inside of a bar. Dean immediately staggered towards the bar. He could feel Sam following him. He ordered a whiskey and Sam three beers. He downed the alcohol, a burning sensation running down his throat. He looked at Sam, who was watching him amused. 

„This is not funny, Sam!“ he said, what only seemed to increase the smirk on his brothers face. „Oh, fuck you“ Dean said, but a smile tugging on the corner of his mouth. „Bitch“

„Jerk“ Sam replied, while taking the beers from the barkeeper. Dean followed Sam, who was heading towards a table. The others already seated. His brother sat down beside Bobby and he slid into the empty space next to Cas. Dean grabbed a beer from the ones Sam had put on the table. Bobby already opening his. 

„Do you really think they will destroy the house?“ Sam asked Cas.

„I don’t know. But if they do so, it wouldn’t be to much effort for them, to rebuild it.“ Bobby listened in thoughtful silence, sipping from his bottle.

Dean looked at their surroundings. Besides the barkeeper and them, only a little group and a lonesome drinker occupied the bar. The wooden furnishing looked shabby and used. The brightest light source was the lamp, that illuminated the pool table in the back. The bar was dominated by the typical odor of alcohol and strangely cigarettes, as if somebody had smoked in here recently. The smell of the leather-upholstery from the seats long gone. Some music coming from a Jukebox in a corner. Dean half listened to Sam and Bobby, who had started a conversation about a possible haunting a few towns from Sioux Falls. The old guy on the bar ordered a new glass of whatever he was having and the group laughed out loud at something one of them had said. They were playing some kind of card game. Probably poker. He watched the barkeeper starting to organize the bottles behind the bar, taking a sip of his beer. Dean stopped in his task, when he noticed, that Cas was watching him, but as he turned his head, Cas seemed to be listening intensely to Bobby, describing how the victim was found.  
Dean shook his head, taking another sip. When the Apocalypse had started, he had thought about Lisa and Ben very often. He even had asked Cas once, if he could look after them. The only thing he got out of that, was that he knew, that she had moved to a new area. He hadn’t asked again. It was better for them anyways, if he was far away from them. 

She had always represented the life, he never could have, but always wanted. But now, as he thought about Lisa’s dark hair and her kind eyes, he couldn’t help, but notice that it didn’t bother him anymore. While he still didn’t want anything bad to happen to her and beware Ben, he didn’t feel the urge to be near her. He had barely thought about Lisa in the last few weeks, he realized kind of surprised. He looked at Cas, who watched the four men, who were playing cards. Dean wondered what Cas was thinking about.

„Do you know how to play?“, Dean asked suddenly curious. Cas turned to look at him. 

„I never played. I’ve watched people play all kind of card games, but I never cared enough back then.“

„I could teach you how to play. If you want to.“, Dean suggested.

„I would like that“, said Cas a little smile lightening up his face. It looked good on him. He liked it when Cas smiled. He didn’t do it very often though, when he thought about it. On the other side, when he had first met him, Cas hadn’t smiled at all. Still being one of the Angels with a stick up their ass. From this point of view, it was a big improvement. 

Suddenly, Sam let out a yelp of surprise, and Dean turned to look at his brother. He was squashed between Bobby and a certain Trickster, who looked like he had always been here. Next to him stood Azrael, looking torn between annoyance and amusement, as Gabriel took a huge bite from a chocolate-bar, probably trying to look as innocent as possible. Dean didn’t think, that it was a coincidence, that the moment they arrived, the song in the Jukebox changed to „Stuck in the middle with you“

„You are here, I suppose, that means, that my house is still standing“, Bobby said dryly.

„Yes“ Azrael answered, watching his brother.

„We are here to tell you, that it is safe to return.“ Gabriel added. He didn’t even wait for a response, he just snapped his fingers, and they found themselves in Bobby’s living room. After this surprise flight, Dean noticed, that this time even Cas appeared a bit more ruffled than average, if this was even possible. Azrael appeared a second later. He had obviously been spared by Gabriel’s way of transportation. Lucky Bastard. Cas was scowling at Gabriel. It was almost funny, how offended he looked, at being dragged here with them.  
At Sam’s question, what their next move would be, everyone agreed, that this topic could wait until tomorrow. There had been enough action for today.

„Heya Cas. Do you wanna learn how to play poker?“, Dean asked.

„I would like that.“

„Sam, you wanna join?“, he also asked his brother, while Bobby got some beer. After all, they had to leave their open bottles at the bar. 

„Nah, maybe later.“ Sam answered. 

Dean went to get the playing cards. As he came back, he was greeted with the sight of two bright coloured spots in Bobby’s living room, that certainly didn’t belong there. Only as he looked a second time, he recognized the things as really big armchairs. Azrael was only a black spot on his chair, with his dark shirt and Jacket, and Gabriel let his legs dangle over the armrest of his own. Azrael’s seat was decorated with green and yellow triangles, and if this wasn’t terrible enough, there was still Gabriel’s armchair...If you looked close enough, you could discover tiny Candy-shapes inside of pink and red hearts all over the colourful chair. Wait, were these Lollipops spinning?! 

„I swear, if I have to look at these chairs for another five seconds, my eyes will start to bleed. Be it because of these colors, or because I cut them out myself.“ Dean said, while sitting down and spreading out the cards on the table.  
Cas seemingly unaffected by their bickering, curiously started to study the cards. Not long after that, Dean was fully involved in explaining the rules of poker and the other Angels started a conversation. Half an hour later Bobby was brooding over an old book, probably already planning their next steps and Sam was watching them amused.

„But if there is a full house, doesn’t that mean, that there has to be an empty one too?“, the Angel asked, his head tilted in confusion. Dean could see Sam holding back his laughter, as he tried to explain it to Cas for the third time. But to be honest, he didn’t try very hard. It was just too adorable as Cas tried to grasp the concept of it. Eventually Sam took pity on the Angel and explained it to him.  
„It’s just a name, Cas.“ 

 

(Pov. Azrael)  
When Azrael asked Sam about the bet, Gabriel’s betrayed look was pure gold. But his brother wouldn’t miss all the fun. A second later, he sat on the backrest of the couch behind the younger Winchester, who almost spilled his beer at the shock. Dean just granting them a short glance and an amused smile and then turned towards Cas again. While on the physical plane, the younger Angel didn’t react at all, he drew his wings closer to his body. Making room for Gabriel, showing his respect. At least, he had stopped keep his wings in the submissive position, he had shown earlier. Always held low, slightly curled to show the vulnerable underside of his wings. 

Gabriel, who had never really cared about these formalities just shook his flying appendages in a reassuring manor and started talking. „So Samsquatch, whatcha sayin’?“, Gabriel asked Sam, his Grace hiding their conversation from the others, only Azrael listening in. „When do you think that these two will get together?“

Sam looked at Dean and Cas in confusion. You could see the expression on his face change as he watched the two interact. He turned back to look at the Trickster, who only smirked. „You wanna bet, if they’ll get together?“

„Yup“, the Archangel said, snapping up another piece of candy. „And, I say, that they’ll admit their big gay love towards each other within...“ Gabriel made a pause, as if he was thinking. „...the next five months.“

„On what conditions?“ Sam asked him. Azrael was watching their interaction with interest. Gabriel’s eyes shone bright with mischief and he was grinning like a maniac. He put a hand on Sam’s shoulder, his golden wings twitching with excitement. Yeah, Trickster-god was a fitting role for his brother. 

„The loser owes the other one a favor.“

„But“, Sam added. „No life-threatening situations, nothing, that leaves the loser with lasting damage and the demanded action isn’t allowed to exceed a time-span of 12 hours an must be within the capabilities of the defeated. And no magic tricks or love potions!“

„Only genuine feelings. But some wisely chosen words here and there are still within the boundaries.“

„As long, as nobody is forced to do anything, I’m game.“ Sam looked at Azrael.

„Oh no, you two have fun, but I’m out.“ That didn’t seem to stop Gabriel. After all, he had already known, that Azrael wouldn’t participate.

„Do we have a Deal?“, he asked the younger Winchester. But Sam hesitated. „Okay listen, I’ll sweeten it for you. Additional to my original proposition, I say, that within the next three months there will be some touching involved, that even you can’t refer to, as platonic. And...“, he made a dramatic pause. „If I lose, you are allowed to expand the time-span of the favor I owe you over a week.“ Sam seemed to have made a decision and he turned to take Gabriel’s outstretched hand. 

„Deal“ And while he was sure at first, that he would win the bet, Sam felt doubts rising in his chest, as he looked at Gabriel’s grinning face. Had he overlooked something? 

„Seal it with a Kiss?“ Gabriel said teasingly, which let Sam almost choke again. The Trickster just laughed at him, and Azrael was also grinning. Gabriel looked over Cas shoulder, to examine his cards and to give him some advice. Unlike Cas, Gabriel wasn’t above cheating with his grace to get a look at Deans cards. 

„Are you sure, that you can win against Gabriel in a bet?“ Azrael asked Sam. 

„I wouldn’t have agreed to it otherwise. Last time we talked, Dean was still kinda attached to Lisa. Between the two of us, I would be happy for Cas and Dean, but as far as I know, Dean has ever only shown interest in women.“

„Technically, Cas doesn’t really have a gender.“, Azrael added. 

„I won’t deny, that if Cas had a female vessel, a relationship would have started half a year ago.“ Sam said, „But under these circumstances...“ Sam’s attention shifted towards the Poker game again, which ended the topic. Cas seemed to have miraculously gained the upper hand, and Azrael let his gaze lazily wander around the room. A thoughtful look crossed his face, as he looked at the cluttered table.

„What’cha thinking?“ Gabriel asked him, sounding curious.

Azrael snorted and turned towards his little brother. „You’ll laugh.“, he nodded towards the beer bottles. „But I kinda miss being able to get drunk.“ Gabriel did indeed laugh. And very loudly to say so.

„This was the last thing, I expected any of my brothers to ever say!“ he managed to utter in between his laughter. „You know, why not? I can’t let the opportunity pass, to get you wasted.“

„Alcohol doesn’t affect me anymore, since I regained my grace.“ Azrael answered.

„Bullshit. You just need the right stuff. And amount.“ Gabriel replied. Even the others were listening now. Gabriel slid down next to Sam, pushing Azrael out of the way, who just sat down on the chair next to his brother.

„Angels can get drunk?“ Dean asked curiously.

„Sure thing Dean-O“, the Trickster answered. The archangel snapped his fingers and the cards and empty bottles vanished. Instead, the table was now crammed with various bottles of hard liquor, and five glasses. He pulled one of the various bottles out of the stack. The bottle wasn’t labeld and was filled with a simple honey-coloured liquid. „One of my personal favorites. Asgardian mead.“ He looked at Sam and Dean. „I won’t stop you from trying it, but I wouldn’t recommend you doing so. It’s a bit stronger, than the average human stuff. But feel free, to take one of the others“

Gabriel poured some of the mead in the glasses of the Angels, while Dean didn’t hesitate to open a bottle of Jack Daniel’s. Castiel eyed his drink suspiciously. „I’m not sure, that this is a good idea.“

„Come on Cas.“ Azrael said grinning, already lifting his glass.

„Yeah don’t be spoilsport“ Gabriel added. „Drink up“ And in a typical manor, he just picked up Cas’ drink and more or less shoved it into his face. Dean watched them amused. Sam also joined them, pouring himself some of the Whiskey in a glass. Gabriel then downed his drink in one swig, the other Angels following. Even Bobby sat down a few minutes later, taking on opening a bottle of Johnny Walker. 

A few additional drinks later, ‘more like fifteen’, Azrael thought, a pleasant buzz made itself noticeable. The Archangel watched Sam taking small sips from his glass, while Gabriel tried to teach Cas, how to turn off his angelic taste buds, to get the „real-human-experience. In his hand a two-colored umbrella drink. Dean had just removed the cap of an unlabeled bottle, filled with a clear substance, and smelled at the opening. He grimaced, at the smell hit him. „Urgh, what is this?“

Gabriel leaned over the table and turned towards Dean. „That, my dear Dean-O, is some home-distilled booze, out of a small town in Poland.“ The older Winchester seemed to consider something and then shrugged, and poured some of it in his glass and also filled Cas’ to the brim, who didn’t complain. He was lucky, that he couldn’t taste anything other than molecules, considering Deans expression, as he downed his share.

An hour later Bobby had left them and gone upstairs. In his opinion, he was to old for this. One of them had suggested introducing Castiel to drinking games. It had probably been, Gabriel. Azrael’s attention span had slowly vanished, with his soberness. Was this even a word? Castiel’s objection, that Bobby was technically the youngest after Sam and Dean didn’t change his decision. Azrael had kept enough of his common sense, to shield Bobby’s room from the noise they made, and they discussed which game to play.

They had agreed on playing ‘never have I ever’, despite Deans interjection, that they weren’t some high school girls on a slumber party. 

„Okay Cas“ said Sam, his voice slightly slurring. „Somebody says something, they have never done, and the ones, who already did it have to drink. Get it?“ The Angel nodded and they could begin. 

„Okay, I’ll start.“ Sam seemed to think for a moment and then started to talk. „Here’s somethin’ simple. Never have I ever ganked a demon.“ Everybody took a sip. 

„It’s my turn now“, the Trickster said seemingly drunk. As he thought what he could say, he started to giggle. „Never have I ever...“ he stopped mid-sentence, only to start again. „Never have I ever blown up a galaxy.“ Azrael took a sip. 

„That was one time!“, he said as he saw the shocked faces of the others. „It was an accident! Besides, back then, there wasn’t really any life existent.“

„Yeah, you had quite a temper. I remember Dad fixing it afterwards.“ Gabriel added, still shaking with laughter.

Azrael also grinned widely. „Michael was so shocked, and Lucifer looked like he wanted to try it too, just to see if he was capable. You were barely a few thousand years old, but you seemed to be very eager to help him out, if he asked you to.“

„I would have..“ Gabriel answered.

„Okay, now there is something for you too.“ Azrael said, turning towards the Winchesters. „Never have I ever taken a body-shot.“ 

„What is a body-shot?“ asked Cas, which threw Dean into a fit of giggles. 

„Most commonly, you drink the shot out of someones belly-button“, Sam explained. Everyone except Cas took a sip.

„Never have I have I ever in my life been the biggest cockblock regarding my siblings.“ Dean said, with a pointed look at Sam. 

„Hey, if I have to drink you certainly do too!“ Dean rolled his eyes, but took a sip nevertheless, a smile on his face.

„Which life?“ Azrael asked out loud.

„What do you mean, which life?“, Sam asked, refilling his glass. This time taking a Japanese liquor. Before Azrael could answer, Gabriel cut him off.

„Countless human reincarnations, since forever, blah blah. Just count the most recent one, and that’s it.“ Azrael shrugged and accepted it without complaint. He probably would’ve only gotten a headache anyways, pulling all these lives to the surface. And the others were to drunk to insist on a real answer. 

It was Cas turn. He seemed to think for a moment and than looked at Gabriel with a genuine curiosity. „Never have I ever been impregnated by a horse.“ Dean almost fell off his chair, because of his laughter. Gabriel’s shocked face vanished soon. He pointed at Castiel. 

„This never happened! One time you try to make a joke to lighten the mood at a gathering, and the wrong person doesn’t get it, and your reputation is forever ruined. Pagans just don’t have a sense of humor.“ He tried to look serious, but didn’t succeed in keeping a straight face. As they all recovered from their laughter, it was Sam’s turn again.

„Never have I ever had a threesome“. Both Gabriel and Dean took a sip, exchanging a look of mutual approval. Gabriel grinned, obviously thinking of something.

„Never have I ever sucked off a guy“ Gabriel and Azrael both took a sip. Sighing, Sam followed. 

„Heya Sam, I’m shocked!“, Azrael said dramatically grasping his chest, while Dean really seemed to have to process this bit of information. 

„I didn’t know, that you swing both ways Sammy“ Dean added, slowly recovering. Sam blushed furiously. 

„It was at the college. It was the first time I was alone, without someone watching me. Before I got to know Jess, I experimented for a while.“

„It is totally normal, to be attracted to people of more than one gender, Sam“ Cas said in all earnest. This seemed to break the stupor on Dean and he grinned at Sam. 

„Didn’t know, that you have other similarities with girls, beside the long hair, Sammy.“, he said jokingly, winking at his brother.

„Shut up Jerk.“

„Bitch“ Dean replied automatically. 

Azrael looked at Sam calculating, but more mockingly than meant seriously. „Never have I ever had a foursome“ Sam raised his hands in defense. 

„Not this experimental.“, he said laughing, while Gabriel emptied his cocktail-glass, and magically refilled it. Deans curiosity was roused. 

„Never have I ever had a fivesome“, he asked, looking at Gabriel.

„Oh please...“ the Trickster said and took another sip. Azrael grinned, guessing where this was going.

„Never have i ever taken part in an orgy, with more than eight people“ Sam continued. Gabriel just took another sip, smirking at the face Dean made.

„Excuse me, but how many people were involved in this?“, he asked.

Gabriel frowned. „Maybe twenty, thirty? You stop counting after a while.“

„How...Wh..“, Sam could only sputter.

„As a pagan god, you come around. You wouldn’t believe what these people did back then, to worship their gods. Ah, these were wild times...“, he said, seemingly lost in memory. „And now you all get to drink, because I’m awesome.“ Nobody objected.

The played for a long time. It wasn’t until Dean had passed out on the couch, that Sam suggested, that it would probably be better, to go to bed. He staggered on his feet, grabbing Gabriel’s arm, to steady his walk. The Angel offered to fly him upstairs, to his current room. Sam promptly had to fight the upcoming nausea, that came with that thought. Turned out, that Dean wasn’t the only one who was good at threatening people.  
Castiel assured Azrael, that he would watch over Dean, sounding way more sober, than Azrael himself. Gabriel was escorting Sam to his room, whining, that he didn’t have a one for himself, to sleep in. Dean, who had woken up again, offered him the guest room, which he was usually occupying. An offer, he probably would have never made, if he had been sober. 

„I’m staying here, s’ okay“, he mumbled through a pillow. Azrael decided to follow help Gabriel, who didn’t seem to be the one supporting Sam anymore.  
Sleeping sounded very good right now. He could just snap up another bed in the room, Gabriel wanted to sleep in.  
One night without thinking about the Apocalypse, sounded very nice. He could always worry tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While I love shipper!Sam, in this fic, I thought it would be more fun, if Sam is a bit oblivious of Dean's not so straight thoughts. The fic kinda writes itself, and it sometimes turns in unexpected directions. Hope you liked that chapter. The next will probably have a bit more plot involved. #Luciferiscoming , well hopefully soon but maybe there will be another chapter without him appearing. We'll see.
> 
> The song "Stuck in the middle with you" is from Stealers Wheel. It was in my Classic Rock Playlist, and i figured the lyrics was kinda fitting.
> 
> Cas asking Gabriel about the Horse is a reference to the story that Loki was once impregnated by a male horse, and later giving birth, to Sleipnir the eight-legged horse. (The original Loki in the North mythology)
> 
> Also for the ones, who already watched the 13th season, I just ignored some things. I won't spoiler anything for the people who haven't. 
> 
> Ps. I am sorry, it's like 3 am, and my brain acts like it's drunk, so sorry for any mistakes.


	7. Preparations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pre-Destiel and the next steps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At first, I wanted to keep this fanfic really close to canon, (obviously apart from throwing in a whole new character) but here we are, a blink later and everybody turned gay!
> 
> Also the first part is from Deans pov, so we get some pre-Destiel.
> 
> Ps. Azrael gets to kill some Demons in this chapter later on. Maybe it's a bit graphic, so be warned.

Chapter 7:

Dean had woken up, at the voice of Sam, suggesting to go to bed. Still pretty wasted, Dean listened to Gabriel’s complaints, about not having a room, to sleep in. „Jus’ take mine, I’m staying here. S’okay.“ He wouldn’t move an inch. He was way to tired to still achieve something today, if only to climb the stairs. He really hadn’t expected his brother to be interested in both parties. What Sam, who was just rumbling up the stairs didn’t know though, was, that he wasn’t the only Winchester, who had made out with guys.  
When Dean had been younger, he had also tried out some things, but that had been years ago. Luckily, Gabriel hadn’t specified, and phrased the question differently. For example if it was the other way round. The Angel would’ve probably noticed, if he had been lying.

He had been seventeen or eighteen, when he went on a Hunt with his Dad, in a small town in Pennsylvania. He’d met someone. It wasn’t the first time, that he had kissed a guy, but this time he had tried some more.

John had found out. And while his father didn’t really care, what he was doing normally, he still had been furious.

The bruises on his neck, from where John had gripped him, had still been visible a week later. Dean hadn’t even suspected something, when he’d entered their shared Motel-room. He’d just come back from a very pleasurable third meeting. But as he felt a strong hand on his throat, he knew something was up. The image of John shoving him into the room, was something, that had never really left him. While there had been the occasional bottle thrown through the room, when John had been drinking again, he had never really hit Sam or him. And Dean had done his best to prevent Sam from being pushed around. And if he had gotten the one or other bruise, by doing so, it had been worth it. „What were you thinking, huh? Hooking up with that boy“ The voice of his father burning itself into his memory. „We are on a hunt! This isn’t some kind of vacation!“

„Why do you care. It’s none of your business!“ It was one of the few times Dean had yelled at his Dad. He would have never done it, if Sammy had been here, but his brother had stayed with Bobby at that time.

„None of my business! The people are already talking! You know exactly, that we can’t afford to draw attention to ourselves! When people talk, they take a closer look and then we have to look out for the cops! People are dying out there. Who do you think will save them, if we are in jail?! We end the job, we leave! End of the discussion. Now grab your stuff, and get in line!“

„Yes Sir.“ He had answered and quietly packed his things. They had left the same night, leaving nothing but the corpse of a witch behind.

John hadn’t cared about the screwing-around-with-a-guy part, but he had been furious, that Dean put their hunt at risk, by doing so.  
‘People are dying.’ That sentence had made the difference. His Dad had been right. The people had already been talking about the handsome stranger, who had hooked up with one of their locals, on top of that with guy. The young cop, with his older partner investigating the strange killings. Dean just hadn’t cared about it, back then. But it was true. The less attention you attracted, the easier was a hunt. You came, you killed the evil thing and then left. That’s how it worked.

Dean knew he liked girls. He had always appreciated the curvy lines of a female body. That was a safe ground. It was easier to stick to that. ‘Liking guys? That had just been a phase. He had nothing against gay people, really. He just wasn’t one of them.“, that at least, he had told himself every time he caught himself staring. After a while, he even started to believe it.

Watching Castiel’s through half lidded eyes, as he gently covered him with a blanket, he wasn’t that sure anymore.  
Had he been sober, he would’ve never let his thoughts continue like that. But right now he was tired and drunk and didn’t give a fuck. So when Cas took a step back, Dean lifted his head slightly and looked at the Angel. „What’cha doin’?“, he uttered.

„I’m respecting your personal space, while I’m going to watch over you.“ the angel said, slightly slurring. Dean needed a moment to comprehend what Cas had said, the sparse moonlight highlighting his delicate features.

„Why don’t you sleep too?“ Dean suggested.

„Angels don’t require sleep“ Cas said.

„Yeah, yeah. But Gabe and Az are sleeping too. There is plenty of space here.“ Dean accomplished his last sentence with a tired gesture of his hand.

„You barely fit on this sofa on your own, Dean!“ Said hunter made an undefinable noise, letting his head fall back on his arms.

„Just grab some blankets Cas“ he mumbled. Dean was met with silence, what made him lift his head again. The angel was gone. A strange emotion washed over him at the disappointment, when a curse and a crash cut through the silence.

„Damn“ the stumbling silhouette on the other side of the room said.

„What happened?“  
„I knocked over a chair.“ Cas gravelly voice answered. As he stepped closer, the moonlight revealed, that he was indeed carrying a blanked and a pillow. Dean managed to produce a smile at that. Despite his insistence, that the there was enough place on the couch, Cas eventually sat down next to the sofa, his head resting on its edge, next to Deans. He finally fell asleep, the faintest smell of ozone in the air.

Waking up as an Angel was different from sleeping as a human. When he heard some noises from the kitchen, Azrael immediately was fully conscious. Yesterday, he had snapped a second bed into existence, inside of the spare room. Only with some effort, he’d talked Gabriel into not putting Sam up the roof, and taking his bed instead. At least, as an Archangel, he didn’t need to deal with a hangover. Hadn’t he been drinking constantly the other day, his grace, would’ve cleaned everything out of his system in less than two hours. Gabriel, who had lived for quite a while in his human vessel, didn’t have this problem. He knew how to keep his grace from influencing the vessel. And while Azrael had found out for himself, how to enjoy food once more, he hadn’t really gotten the hang of getting drunk more easily... On the other hand, he didn’t really know, if that was something he wanted to achieve.

Right now, he was greeted with the sight of a still sleeping Trickster. Gabriel was sprawled out on the other bed in the guestroom, his wings lazily twitching here and there, and occupying most of the room, what left little space for Azrael. Typical.

The Archangel got up, not caring about Gabriel waking up, as he shoved his golden wings aside. His brother just buried himself deeper in the blankets. And of course tried to hit him with one of his flying appendages. With a flap of his wings, Azrael had dodged the attack and was now standing in the library/living room. Two sets of blankets were draped over the sofa. It looked like Gabriel would win the bet after all. Empty and half drunk bottles of various liquors were still distributed all over the room. He let them vanish with a thought and then stepped through the door, to enter the kitchen.

Castiel was sitting on the table, hands on his head, facing the door, while Dean rummaged through the fridge. Azrael couldn’t hide a grin, when the younger angel noticed him and groaned.

„I take it, that your Grace didn’t manage to prevent a hangover“ said Azrael, at which Dean turned around. He grinned at Cas.

„This is pathetic. You don’t feel any aftereffects?“ Cas asked.

„The benefit of being and Archangel. We heal faster.“ he answered, while sitting down in front of Castiel.

„Even Dean isn’t hungover“

„Shh, I’m trying to find some bacon. Sam awake yet?“ Dean answered, turning his attention back towards the fridge.

„I don’t think so.“ Azrael replied. „At least it doesn’t sound like that. „His breathing is to even, for him to be awake.“, he added after a second.

„Freaky, that you can hear him.“ Dean answered. „Checkpot“, the hunter muttered, as he pulled something out of the fridge.

„I think Bobby is outside, working on some cars. He said, that he would only come in again, when we ‘get our lazy asses to clean up the mess, we left’“ Cas said.

„And get rid of the smell, whatever that means.“ Dean added, putting a pan on the stove.

They sat in silence, the only noise in the room, was Dean roaming around, and soon the smell of food filled the air. Upstairs Sam also seemed to have woken up. Azrael watched the younger angel. „The first time you’ve been drinking?“

„And the last“ Cas replied.

„Everybody says that, the first time, they are hungover.“ Gabriel’s sudden appearance on the kitchen counter, set off a series of curses from Dean. Azrael felt a bit shabby for smirking as he watched Cas flinch at the noise, when Dean dropped the pot he had been holding.

„Can you do something against this?“ Cas asked Azrael, pointing at his head, while Dean tried to shove Gabriel off the counter, when he didn’t pay any attention.

„What do I get out of this?“ Azrael said grinning. Cas groaned. He turned towards Gabriel. Dean seemed to have given up, in favor of looking after his food.

„Don’t look at me. This is far too amusing.“, the Trickster replied, sharing a look with Azrael, who grinned back.

„To say it in Deans words. You two are dicks.“ Laughter filled the kitchen, when another voice joined them.

„Please, lower the volume for a bit.“ Sam stood in the doorway. Cas looked up.

„Thank father, I’m not the only one.“ he said.

„What?“

„Being hungover.“

„Want some Sammy?“ Dean waved his plate with the greasy bacon and some Toast.  
„See, not even Dean feels something.“ Cas answered, nodding towards the older Winchester and Gabriel who sat on the counter, chewing on some kind a chocolate.

Sam watched his brother for a second and then sat down on the chair next to Azrael. „That’s because he’s still drunk.“

„That’s so not true.“ Dean said.  
„Well, at least you didn’t throw up in the middle of the night.“, added Gabriel, looking at Sam. Dean grinned smugly.

„In my defense, it was you, that dared me to try that asgardian mead.“

„I don’t remember that part.“ Gabriel said, suddenly looking very innocent. Turned out Sam was right. After the breakfast, well Dean was the only one who really ate something - not counting Gabriel - and Sam’s bottle of water, the older Winchester also felt the impact of yesterday’s drinking.

Eventually the Archangels took pity, and relieved the hungover people of their suffering.

When Dean had woken up, he was kinda freaking out. That feeling had soon vanished, but when Azrael pulled his mind from his drunken state, it all started again.  
‘Holy shit, he had asked Cas to sleep next to him on the couch! And he had thought about this hunt in Pennsylvania. He hadn’t consciously thought about that for years. But now...  
He’d woken up with face almost buried in Cas’ dark hair. At least the Angel had also been asleep. Hopefully. Now he wasn’t that sure anymore. The thought, that it was totally normal to share his sleeping space with a best friend in a totally platonic way, didn’t have the calming effect, that it had in the morning. Because if he was honest with himself, his thoughts hadn’t been that platonic yesterday. The last thought was shoved deep down. 'No Cas was only his friend. Well, maybe he had a handsome vessel. Everybody could find somebody attractive, objectively spoken. But was it all about that?  
They had to deal with more urgent things right now! But that didn’t stop him, from shooting Cas a quick glance.

They were all gathered in the library, Bobby behind the desk, Gabriel again occupying his armchair, commenting one thing or another, while the others remained standing and discussed their next steps.

„And what do you want to do, when we find Lucifer? If we find him.“ Sam asked.

„I’m going to talk to him.“ Azrael answered.

„We don’t even know where he is“ Bobby interjected.

„And you think he’ll listen to you?“ Dean added ignoring Bobby’s comment. He doubted that. Even Gabriel frowned as he listened to the other Archangel.

„He will.“

„Brother, are you sure...“, Gabriel started carefully. Azrael cut him off right there.

„We have to find him first anyways. You can discuss the details, while I am going to search for him“ He disappeared with a flutter of wings.

„And here I thought that you were being the King’s of denial...“ Gabriel muttered what made Sam snort. „Listen“ Gabriel said out loud, as he appeared right next to Bobby. „I don’t share my brothers optimism regarding Lucifer. While I think, that it is possible, that he can convince him to discontinue his plans, he doesn’t have my memories. He hasn’t seen Lucifer, in the end and how he was, shortly before Michael threw him in the cage.“ Gabriel began pacing, what made him look oddly human.

Well, in comparison to other Angels, Azrael and Gabriel had always seemed very human. The way they were sitting or even how they were doing the most basic human things, that even Cas hadn’t seemed to have grasped the concept of, yet. Like blinking, or shifting weight from on leg to the other. As a hunter you noticed little things. Unlike Gabriel, Azrael hadn’t done it at first, but as he spent more time with them, it was, like he unconsciously fell back into a pattern, something that he used to do. Hadn’t Gabriel mentioned yesterday, that he had been human for a time? Like Anna?  
Dean was pulled from his thoughts, when Gabriel continued talking.

„Unlike me, Azrael is stronger than Lucifer, but he won’t harm him. Lucifer could probably kill him, if he wanted to. You need a backup plan if Azrael doesn’t succeed. And even if, there is always Michael. He is, if not even more keen on following the plan.“ Dean shared a look with Sam.

„We’re already thinkin’ ahead of ya.“ Bobby said.

„We are searching for the colt“ Cas added. The archangel stopped and seemed thoughtful.

„Not a bad idea.“ the Trickster started. Dean grinned smugly. „But it won’t kill him“

„What?!“ Bobby said, voicing what everybody was thinking.

„The only few things, that can kill an Archangel. The most obvious, an Archangel-blade, wielded by another Archangel, which is obviously out“

„Why?“ Dean asked. Gabriel looked at him, as if he was stupid.

„Because Azrael won’t do it, and I wouldn’t succeed in doing so, even if I wanted. My chances are almost nonexistent. Did you even listen to the ‘who-is-stronger’ part? And Michael wants to do the same thing. The only difference is, that he and Lucifer are pretty even in power. The outcome of them fighting on earth, is the thing we want to prevent!“ He shot Dean a last look and then continued. „Second there is Death’s scythe...“

„You mean death, like capital-D Death?“ Sam asked.

„Yeah, and could you please stop interrupting me?“

„Oh sorry, please continue.“

„Thank you“ Gabriel made a short pause, before he started to continue. „So, Death’s scythe. Nobody knows where it is, and Death itself, is chained down somewhere. But he is all about natural order. I don’t think, that he will kill Lucifer, even if you ask him to.“

„Are there any other options?“ Bobby asked. Gabriel seemed uncomfortable but he continued nevertheless.

„I wouldn’t really call them options... Obviously our father could kill us, but he hasn’t done it back then, he won’t do it now. Michael’s lance could probably do some damage. Leviathans would also be able, but freeing them would be even nastier, than the Apocalypse.“ Dean noticed Cas shivering next to him. Unconsciously, he took a step closer.

„Okay and what do we do now?“ Bobby asked.

„Hey nobody knows. Maybe Azrael succeeds. But otherwise...You should continue searching for the colt.“

„But you said, it wouldn’t kill him.“ Dean was confused.

„Yeah, but who said you can’t stop him otherwise?“ Gabriel said. „The best option lies in finding the rings of the four horsemen. They are the key to open the cage again, but as I said. Death is still chained down, and while he is not walking the earth, we have no chance in collecting all the rings. I don’t know if we should count ourselves lucky, but I don’t think, that it will stay that way for long.

While Lucifer can’t be killed by the colt, it surely will have some kind of impact. It will knock him out for about ten, fifteen seconds. And afterwards, he will be pissed. But in the meantime, you could throw him back in the cage. Unless you want Sam to play the bait, and get an Angel-Upgrade. If you are really willing to get yourself possessed, you could overpower him. The chances are pretty low, but you could, if you possess enough willpower...“

„We search for the colt!“ Dean immediately interjected. ‘He wouldn’t let his brother play an Angel-condom. No way!’

„That’s what I thought“, the Trickster said.

„What do you mean, Death won’t stay chained down for long?“

„Lucifer will probably try to summon him, and bind him to his will“ answered Cas’ gravelly voice.

„Oh, if that isn’t what we all want. Death bound to the Devil’s will.“ muttered Dean.

„Why aren’t we doing the ritual?“, asked Sam. „Lucifer won’t get him, and we would get the Ring“

„It isn’t that easy.“ Gabriel said.

„When is it ever?“ Bobby said.

„That ritual involves a lot of sacrifices and would require at least a month of preparation...“

„But it can be done?“

„Hypothetically..“

„Could you look into that? Just as an escape plan.“

Gabriel sighed. „I won’t promise anything“

„That’s all I ask“, the old hunter said.

„And we try to find the colt.“ Dean said.

„Don’t forget about the rings.“ Sam added.

And while the others were discussing the „details“, Azrael was standing knees-deep in the guts of a demon.

After he had left, Azrael had aimlessly searched for someone, who could know something. He could have asked a Reaper, but he didn’t want to let his frustration out on them. When he felt the presence of something evil lurking beneath, he didn’t continue to fly. Instead he stopped in the middle of a nest of demons. He would find his brother, and he would stop him from going on with his plan. Nobody had to die. Not Michael. Not Lucifer. These Demons on the other hand...

At least ten pairs of black eyes immediately focused on him, when he appeared in the middle of the bar. Almost every person inside was a Demon. Their twisted faces, lurking beneath the surface, grinning with malice, the stink of hell sticking on them, following them wherever they went. With a thought, he sealed the exits. Some of their meatsuits still alive, the minds of the people locked inside their own body’s screaming in agony, some of them had gone crazy at the horror, they had to endure. Some of them still fighting, or the most scary ones. The ones who had given up, silently enduring the pain. Others would have been already rotting carcasses, if there hadn’t been a twisted being inside, pulling the strings. Azrael recognized the only two humans in the bar and with a shove of his grace, they were outside of the building. The Demons, recognizing what he was, panicked. Terror on their faces. On the ones they were wearing, and the ones beneath. A shiver of excitement rolled down Azraels spine. They were trying to escape, but the Angel kept them inside of their vessels.

Azrael smiled and started to talk. „ I will only ask once. Who can tell me where Lucifer is?“

  
Nobody answered. They obviously feared the wrath of his brother way more, than his. One of the beings took a step forward. For an ordinary human, it would  look like a young woman. She would have been pretty, soft brown locks and and big lashes framing dark eyes, weren’t there the fact, that her slim throat had been slit. Probably immediately after the possession. The soul inside was long gone. The demon had no fun in keeping her in the body. „How dare you. Thinking, that we would betray our father!“, is screeched. The face beneath twisting and turning with anger, the limbs under the surface possessing to much ankles, looking alien and otherworldly. Fingers almost claw-like, it took a step forward. That was, what he had been waiting for. One beat with his wings, and Azrael stood directly in front of the demon. With one fluid motion, he pushed his hand through the skin at her stomach, and he gripped tightly. He wasn’t focused on the physical body of the being, and while he too, was clutching some organs, he was holding the very essence of the demon. He squeezed. The being screamed. A dark smirk appeared on Azraels face, sharp teeth bared, a predator surrounded by prey. While Demons had been souls once, they weren’t anymore. Nothing held him back. Slowly, he let his grace leak through his fingers. That was no ordinary smiting, no. This was pure agony for the Demon. It’s very essence cracked, like glass. It lit up a last time from within, before the now empty body fell to the floor with a thud, a puddle of blood gathering beneath. The moment of silence was broken, when a few of the demons tried to run towards the exits, clawing on the door, while others knew, that there was no sense in doing so. Three of them tried to jump him simultaneously. He smote them all with a thought. Azrael allowed himself to let loose of his... more ruthless side. The human souls inside the demons were not as lucky as the others. But war meant casualities. Ten minutes later, and some more dead Demons, he knew what he wanted to know. It was time to fly back.

Azrael appeared in the middle of the library. The Winchesters, Bobby and former Trickster still in the same room. They seemed kinda shocked at his sudden appearance.  
„You didn’t bother to clean up, did you?“ Gabriel said after a moment of silence, waving with his hand and Azrael realized, that his arm was still painted red, almost all the way up to his elbow. He let his grace wash over his body, and clean up the mess. „And, got your information?“

Azrael nodded. „I know where he will be Thursday, three weeks from now. Carthage, Missouri."

"What's he doing there?" Bobby asked. 

Azrael's smile vanished. "And I looked, and behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Death, and Hell followed with him. And power was given unto them over the fourth part of the earth, to kill with sword, and with hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the earth.“, he quoted. "He wants to raise Death."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise, there is going to be more plot. This was like the upbeat for the next chapter. Like, it's preparing for the meeting with Lucifer. I would really like to write a longer chapter, at least the next one, but I don't know if I find the time. Hopefully, I do, because I really want to get to Lucifer.
> 
> The main focus in the last two chapters was Destiel, and I wrote a lot out of Deans perspective, I hope I got the character right. Hopefully Azrael get's some more attention again too, but let me know, what you think about Dean and Cas. And if you want to read something from Cas' or Gabriel's pov, or if you think I should stick to Azrael more.


	8. Secrets (The Real Ghostbusters)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everybody has to take care of his own things, before they can face the Devil

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, writing a longer chapter didn't really work out, but well. We are getting there.

Chapter 8: (The Real Ghostbusters)

„Carthage Missouri? Why Carthage?“ Sam asked.

„The Demons I asked didn’t know. They weren’t important enough.“ Azrael replied, inspecting his clothes.

„Dude. You can’t just vanish like that. Usually you discuss things first!“ Dean said, after recovering from his shock. Azrael just stared at him with a deadpan look.

„Why would you care? I got the information, that we needed.“

„Dean’s kinda right, you know. It’s a thing of principle...“ Gabriel added, immediately regretting his words, after they had escaped his mouth, shrinking under the dark look, Azrael shot him.

„Know what? I’m gonna be outside for a while. Don’t bother looking for me.“, the dark-haired Archangel said coldly. He spread his wings, causing a gust of wind as he disappeared. ‘Fuck them’, he thought, as he sat down on top of a demolished car in the backyard, his legs crossed in an old human habit. He looked up to the sky, his enormous wings raised high, an obvious threat to anybody, who dared to approach him right now. Clouds were gathering, that hadn’t been there a few hours before and Azrael could hear the distant rumbling of thunder. ‘He knew exactly what they were thinking. But Lucifer couldn’t be lost. Even if he hadn’t seen him for a long time...  
Azrael missed him. After he had remembered his angelic life, the Angel was hit with the loss of his brothers. Being near Gabriel... It made him happy and miserable at the same time. It made the absence of the others only more prominent. What had gotten Michael to the point, that he thought, that killing Lucifer was the right choice? At least Gabriel knew, when it was better to leave him alone...’  
Azrael drew his gaze from the darkening sky, and looked at his neatly folded hands in his lap instead. He thought about Gabriel’s words. ‘Always blame it on Dad... Had it really not been the fault of his father?’ Azrael had avoided to think about it, by now. ‘Earth had only existed for a short time, when he had lost his Grace. But Heaven had existed and Purgatory. Three dimensions closely connected and an empty space, full of potential, now only known as Hell. His father had started to create other Angels beside them. Humans had to be there shortly after. He didn’t remember that... But his father had disappeared. Left his creations alone. Most of the Angels didn’t even seem to be aware of that fact. How could he not blame God for this? Even if he didn’t want the Apocalypse to happen. Michael and Raphael were alone up there. How were they supposed to know, what to do?’

Azrael’s anger increased. He was ripped from his thoughts, by a loud crunching noise. When he looked up, to find its source, he noticed, that the grass and the other plants surrounding him, had withered and looked dead. Apparently, the noise, had been caused by a car without wheels, that had been held up, by some wooden blocks. All of them were rotting. The one closest to him had given in under the weight, letting the car drop on the gravel beneath. Quickly he restrained himself. Letting his powers roam free... he hadn’t lost his focus like that for ages.  
‘From what Azrael had heard of the Angels, Lucifer didn’t care about the humans and neither did Michael. And while it wasn’t his priority, preserving humanity, the Archangel still remembered living as one. They didn’t deserve that. Being wiped out. Maybe some of them. But there was also beauty in their chaos. No Angel could do what they did. He knew that Gabriel thought that Lucifer couldn’t be redeemed, not really. He hadn’t even talked about Michael.’ He snorted. ‘As if he didn’t knew that they were planning something. But what exactly they were looking for... he didn’t know. Probably for a way to kill Lucifer. Azrael hadn’t really cared either. It didn’t look like they’d had any success yet, and considering that not much could kill an Archangel - if you could trust the Reaper’s memory - he hadn’t really thought about it. Finding Gabriel had been his priority, but if the Trickster was helping the two brothers...’ The rumbling in the distance got louder and the first few drops of rain started to reach the Ground. Azrael didn’t react at all. ‘The question was: What should he do next? He could keep an close eye on Carthage, maybe Lucifer showed up earlier. But he had already payed it a visit. Nothing out of the ordinary had happened yet. It was probably better, to keep waiting.’ Heavy raindrops were now falling from the sky, starting to form small puddles on the floor. ‘He could keep an eye on the Winchesters. See what they were planning... Yes, that was probably the best idea. But how? After all, he didn’t really know if the brothers would accompany him to Carthage. Maybe Gabriel would? But it was probably better, to go alone. They were only three weeks left.  
Fuck.  
They only had three weeks left! What if the others were right and Lucifer was really the twisted Angel, everybody seemed to see him as. Was he even ready to face this outcome?'

The Archangel was still thinking, when the older Winchester watched him from the Inside.

„What is wrong with this guy?!“ Dean said, looking out of the kitchen window. The whole group now gathered in the other room. Cas awkwardly seated next to the green-eyed hunter, who tried to spot the Archangel. You could barely make it out. The night had approached rapidly and because of the heavy rain, that had only increased. But there, in the distance. A lonesome figure sat on the roof of a rusty car, not moving at all. „He’s been out there for hours!“ The older Winchester voiced and then sank back in his chair, staring at an almost untouched bottle of beer.

„He’s probably frustrated.“ Gabriel added absently from the wall, he leaned against. „He’s never really doubted his success, in talking Lucifer out of continuing his destructive plans.“ The Archangel seemed thoughtful.

„You think, he isn’t that sure anymore?“ Sam interfered, sitting opposite of his brother.

„Hmm“ The Trickster suddenly looked up. „I have some things to take care of. Just leave a prayer, if you need me“

„Where are you going?“ Cas asked the same moment, as Dean said „What?“

„Well,“ Gabriel said, as he pushed himself from the wall and took a step in their direction. „I am still the Trickster.“

„What has that to do with anything?“ Sam asked.

„If ‘Loki’ just vanishes, don’t you think that this will raise some questions?“, Gabriel added sarcastically.

„What are ya going to do now, huh? Kill a few guys here and there?“ Bobby replied dryly.

„Doesn’t sound like a bad idea, but I think, that I’ll just leave a few hints, that I, speak Loki, will take an extended vacation. And while you fellas obviously don’t seem to care, what happens after the Apocalypse, if there even is an after, I certainly prefer it, to not be hunted down by pagans. You know, they are not of the forgiving kind. Lying to them for a few centuries about ‘only’ being a Trickster or keeping from them, that I am the brother of the two guys, who are the cause of this Apocalypse. What do you think, they’ll reckon worse? It probably doesn’t matter. It’s likely, that they’ll try to kill me anyway. So, just send me a prayer or something, if you need me.“ With that, he was gone. Only to reappear a second later right next to Dean, who almost punched Gabriel after he had managed to stay on the chair.  
The Trickster, now grinning, started talk. „I almost forgot...“, he slightly moved closer to the ear of the hunter. „The amount of gay-porn you mange to watch on Sam’s laptop without him noticing. I’m impressed Dean-o.“ He patted the shoulder of the shocked Hunter and then fluttered away, winking at Sam. ‘He would win this bet. Even if Dean never had watched this kinda stuff on Sam’s laptop, it would get him thinking. And if not him, then the others for sure.’

The silence, that had followed the statement of the Trickster, certainly marked one of the most awkward situation in Deans life. Sam looked at him, one eyebrow raised and Cas seemed to be strangely interested. Even after he had finally regained his voice - obviously he had denied everything - he could still feel the tension. It had only grown, when Bobby started to talk. That there was nothing to be ashamed of and that they would love him, ‘no matter what’. Luckily, that was the moment, when Azrael choose to appear in the kitchen. Never had he been more thankful to anyone. As usual, the Archangel seemed to grasp the mood, but he didn’t mention it. He just took a beer and then sat down on a chair, looking amused. Not many words had been exchanged after that. At least tomorrow, he could distract himself with the search for the horsemen and Cas would search for the Colt again.

It couldn’t have passed more that a week and Azrael had followed each and every step Castiel took. When the Angel eavesdropped on some hunters, he was there too. When the Angel interrogated a Demon, he stood in silence, watching. Even if Cas sometimes turned around twice, suspicion in his eyes, he never noticed his silent shadow. After a few days, it all made sense. ‘They were looking for the colt’ But Castiel didn’t seem to succeed in his task. Every lead he got, dissolved into sweet nothing. Suddenly a prayer reached him, the familiar voice of Sam Winchester in his mind. He was torn. Should he answer right away? A last look at Cas, he would at least spend another hour hovering over these hunters, and he disappeared, searching for the familiar car on the highway, Sam had described.  
Turning up inside of the vehicle, he was met with the dark looks of the Winchesters. „What’s up with you guys?“

„Oh thank God you’re here“ Sam immediately said. „Could you transport us to the Pineview Hotel, outside of Toledo?“

„Sure, but why?“

„Just do it!“ Dean almost shouted, his shoulders tense, knuckles gripping the steering wheel tightly. Azrael raised an eyebrow, but did as told.

They found themselves in front of a hotel. A few cars parked outside, but otherwise nothing out of the ordinary. No people could be seen outside, but it was late evening. The Winchesters left the car and sprinted towards the entrance. Azrael followed them in a walking pace. ‘Why were they so concerned?’ As he approached the hotel, he felt the faint presence of something lingering there. Something, that should’ve been gone a long time ago. A ghost? Maybe even more than one...

Eventually arriving inside of the Lobby, Azrael stopped. At the other end of the room, he saw the two brothers talking to a third person. As his eyes focused on the unknown men, a name in his mind stood out. Chuck Shurley. A prophet?

„...no I didn’t“ the guy said, looking at the Hunters

„Yeah you did, you texted me. This address, life or death situation. Any of this ring a bell?“ Sam asked him. ‘Well that explained it.’ Now curious, Azrael watched the conversation.

„I didn't send you a text.“

“We would have driven all night, if we hadn’t called an Angel to help us out!“ Dean added angrily

“I'm sorry, I don't understand what could...oh no.“ the prophet seemed to remember something.

“What?“ the older Winchester asked. In this moment a squeal from the stairs attracted his attention.

„SAM! You made it!!“, the blonde girl shouted.

„Oh, ah, Becky, right?“, said Winchester said, shooting Dean a glance of pure helplessness.

Becky ran towards the brothers. „Oh, you remembered.“ Then she added in a slightly darker voice. „You been thinking about me.“

“I...“, Sam started but was immediately cut off by the girl.

“It's ok, I can't get you out of my head either. “

“Becky, did you take my phone?“, Chuck interrupted the, was it flirting? A discussion between the two developed.

“I just borrowed it from your pants.“

“Becky...“

“What? They're going to want to see it!“

„See what?“ the Winchesters interrupted.

“Oh My God. I love it when they talk at the same time!!“ Becky squealed.

“It’s nothing. I’ll just pay your room for the night and tomorrow morning you can just go back.“ Azrael had slowly stepped closer. The prophet now looked at  
him. It reminded him of something, he couldn’t really point out. „Is this the Angel you came with?“, Chuck asked. When Sam nodded, Becky eyed him curiously.

„You could just go back now! Sorry for the trouble.“

„No, they should stay!“ Becky said.

„Why?“, Dean asked.

„It’s a surprise“ the girl said and then stormed off towards the desk clerk, probably to get a room for the two brothers.

„Guys. I'm sorry. For everything.“ the Prophet said.

After a short conversation, the brothers decided to stay over night, despite the mysterious circumstances. They didn’t have to pay for it, so why not?  
Azrael remembered Castiel. He should probably return. While it was very unlikely, that Cas had found a useful trace but nevertheless, the Archangel took off, but only after he had warned the Winchesters about the possible haunting.

Not even 48 hours later, and after a phone call between Dean and Cas, Azrael recognized a change in Castiel’s method of interrogation. Where previously the Angel had only ever asked about the whereabouts the Colt, he now asked for a demon named Crowley.


	9. Last Night on Earth (Abandon all hope)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys get the Colt, Dean has a shocking realization and we get a glimpse of the Devil

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, I forgot to upload last weeks chapter! So now you get the double amount. I really thought, that I could get to the Lucifer meets Azrael part, but there are just so many things, that need to happen before that! At least, the mainstory is going on and there is some plot.

Chapter 9:  
(Abandon all hope)

It took its time, but Castiel had finally found the Demon.  
Azrael could now see, that he had been a heavenly warrior. Castiel had wiped out at least two demon nests a day, interrogated the Demons and searched for other nests. Also he sometimes had found the one or other witch, to question. Azrael always keeping a certain distance, but never far behind. 

The archangel had followed Castiel to a ‘modern crossroad’. A few highways, that were crossing each other. Beneath the lowest of these, Azrael could see Castiel, as he stood behind a pillar, phone in his hand and observing from a short distance, when an old man got out of an expensive car.  
The man wore a suit under his coat, and seemed nervous, as he dug a hole in the ground. Then, he put a little box inside and covered it with dirt and gravel. When the man got up, Azrael felt something approach. The stink of Hell following the being. A demon. 

„Mr. Pendleton, I presume.“, the well clothed Demon said. For a human, the thing would probably look like a man in his forties, dark hair and wearing an, also, expensive Italian suit. 

‘What life had he lived to know the difference between an Italian suit and an ordinary one...’ Azrael didn’t know. Pendelton turned around to see the man who wasn't there before.

“Name's Crowley.“, the Demon said.

“In my negotiations I was, uh, dealing with a very young, attractive, uh, lady.“ Pendelton said, looking slightly uncomfortable.

“Yes. I know. But you, piggy bank, you are a big fish, and I wanted to do you the honor of sealing this deal personally.“, Crowley said. How Pendelton didn’t see through the lie, Azrael couldn’t understand. The Demon obviously sealed the Deal by himself, because he could get some kind of personal satisfaction out of it. 

“She said the deal would be sealed with a kiss.“. Pendelton said, sweat running down his face.

“That's right.“, the Demon said. 

Pendelton stared at the Demon. Crowley grinned. The twisted face beneath also flashing its sharp teeth.

“No, I mean, she said—I don't—“ Azrael also grinned at the mans sputtering.

“Your choice. You can cling to six decades of deep-seated homophobia, or give it up and get a complete bailout for your bank's ridiculous incompetence.“ Crowley said, knowing that the other man wouldn’t resist.

The Demon took a few steps closer to Pendelton, now standing in his personal space. 

“There are just things that I—“, Pendelton said, not meeting Crowley’s eye. 

“Going once.“, Crowley said.

“I don't think so—“

“Going twice.“, the Demon continued, as if he didn’t care. 

“All right! All right.“, Pendelton said. Crowley pulled Pendelton in, a smug grin on his face. 

“No—“ the Banker said, but Crowley kissed him anyway. Castiel had too, watched everything, still on the phone. Azrael couldn’t really see the Angel, but he sensed him not far away, masking his presence, as he had done, shortly after he had visited Ilchester, where Lucifer was freed.

“Got him.“, he heard Castiel say.

Crowley released Pendelton. Azrael had to admit, that he liked the Demon. Well, as much as you could like a these creatures. He was funny.

“The demon Crowley is making a deal; even as we speak, it's—going—down.“ Castiel said.  
‘Holy shit, this Angel did really not know, how to socially interact.’ Azrael thought. He could hear the slightly distorted voice of Dean Winchester through the phone.

“Going down? Right. Okay, Huggy Bear, just don't lose him.“  
‘Oh, wow. We are getting to the nicknames. Gabriel is so winning this bet’

“I won't lose him.“ the Angel said seemingly confused.

“Damn you.“ Pendolton said to Crowley. He turned and quickly walked to his car.

„Enjoy the obscene wealth. See you in ten years.“ Crowley shouted after him. Then the Demon pulled out a cellphone. He started to walk, and then vanished. That was Castiel’s sign. He quickly followed the Demon and vanished too. Azrael spread his wings, and followed the trail of Castiel’s grace.  
Castiel had stopped abruptly and now Azrael could see why. The Mansion, that Crowley obviously had entered was heavily warded against any angelic interference.

“I followed him. It's not far, but—it's layered in Enochian warding magic.“, Cas said to Dean, still on the phone. „I can't get in.“

“That's okay, you did great. We'll take it from here.“ Dean said. Castiel looked around for a last time, and then took off. Azrael approached the Mansion. He laid his palm upon the geometric warding patterns, testing its strength. He frowned. It was a good warding. But not much could stop and Archangel. It wouldn’t be very subtle, but he would be able to get through.  
Azrael grinned, as he finally released his grace from the place deep down in his core. He was no longer disguised, but now it didn’t matter anymore. He wouldn’t be able to destroy the warding directly, but he could destroy the wall, it was written on. Light shone through, beneath his fingers, and the Enochian signs began to glow, now even visible for humans. This was the moment, when an ordinary Angel would have to give up. But he was an Archangel. They were pure power. So he increased the amount of Grace and pushed through the last resistance. The wall collided, clouds of dust floating in the air. Azrael stepped through, and was immediately greeted by two Demons. He looked at them. The one on the left stopped, his eyes widening in fear, as he realized, what he was. While he turned to run, to save his own life, the other one attacked him. Or, he tried to attack him. With only a thought, he was now laying on the floor, throwing up a blood and a black smokey substance. The other one had almost reached the Exit when Azrael snapped his fingers and the Demon exploded, leaving particles of blood and flesh everywhere. The one on the ground had stopped moving. Azrael stepped over the body and approached the house. ‘There were two possibilities. One, Crowley was in possession of the Colt, or two, and that was worse, the Demon was actually able to kill an Archangel and in possession of something far worse.’ 

Azrael entered the Mansion. It was quiet beside the distant sounds of music. He walked through the house. The interior looked expensive. Persian rugs, chandeliers, famous paintings and stuff. ‘The King of the Crossroads was probably already informed, that he was here. Crowley wouldn’t disappear, until he knew, what was going on.’, Azrael thought, while he smelled on the opening of a whisky bottle. ‘Scottish. Crowley would probably think, that it was a witch. A powerful witch, the way he had killed the Demons outside. But he had destroyed the wall with the warding. The Demon would probably be confused.’ He poured himself a glass and sat down on the nearest chair. He could waste his time, looking for the demon, or he could just wait here and drink his whiskey. The second part sounded way better.  
It didn’t take long, till Crowley appeared. „What is it with you angels?!“, the Demon started. Azrael looked up and smirked at the King of crossroads, who paled slightly. But he didn’t try to run.

„Please, feel free to sit where you like, it’s your house after all.“ Azrael said with a wave of his hand, and he took a sip of the whiskey. The Demon did indeed sit down. 

„Lucifer“ he said.

„How is it, that everyone thinks, that I am my little brother?“ Azrael replied, reminded of Raphael, and the bitterness that had overcome him then. Crowley swallowed visibly. Azrael grinned, amused by Crowley’s confusion. And maybe his fear, if he was honest. „I'm not Michael either. I’m only here to talk.“ ‘Well, it depended on the outcome of the talk...’, the Angel thought. ‘Crowley would never tell him, what kind of weapon he owned. He had to outsmart the demon’

„What would an Archangel want from me?“

„I want to know, what you intend to do with a certain weapon, that you are in possession of.“

„I don’t understand“ Crowley said. Azrael leaned forward.

„Don’t pretend that you are stupid, I know, that you are not.“ Crowley hesitated for a moment. „You are in possession of a weapon that kills archangels“ ‘Well, hopefully he was not... but he needed the demon to think, that he knew everything’

The Demon pulled the colt out of the inner pocket of his suit and pointed it at Azrael. The angel was relieved. The famous gun wouldn’t be able to kill Lucifer, but the Demon obviously didn’t know that. 

„You don’t really just want to talk, do you ?“ Crowley asked. 

‘Well, he had wanted to make sure, that the Demon couldn’t kill his brother, or help Sam and Dean with this task, but he couldn’t really admit that, could he?’Azrael put down his whiskey glass. ‘The Winchesters would come to get the colt. They were plotting behind his back, but he didn't want them to be killed by that Demon. And if he was already here...’ „The Winchesters are going to visit you in the near future. And they will try to get the colt. No harm will come to them, and any of their friends.“ A strange look appeared on Crowley’s face, but vanished as quickly as it came.  
„Why should I care?“, the well clothed being in front of Azrael asked. 

„Because I ask you to“, the Archangel replied.

„I don’t react well to threats“, the Demon said and fired the gun with a calculating expression. The angel reacted immediately.

„Neither do I“ Azrael answered a second later. Now standing behind Crowley, gripping the shoulder of the demon, who had wanted to vanish. A silvery bullet rolling between two fingers. „You are lucky, that I don’t want to kill you... Next time, when you try to shoot me, be sure, that I don’t pay any attention.“, he whispered into Crowley’s ear. Then he flapped his wings and stopped in front of the mansion.  
With a snap of his fingers, the destroyed wall stood, as it was before. Even the warding was intact again. Maybe not as powerful, as before, but it would have to do.

 

In the meantime, the Winchesters were preparing for their encounter with Crowley. Castiel watched Sam, who was sitting at his motel bed, trying for the third time, to reach Gabriel.

‘Dear Gabriel, who art dealing with the pagans. We need your help. It’s because of the colt...’ Sam opened his eyes and looked at Dean, who stood in front of the second motel bed. 

„Still nothing?“, the older Winchester asked. Sam only raised an eyebrow, as if to say „really? Do you see someone magically appearing?“  
Dean rolled his eyes and turned around. „Yeah, yeah. Pray if you need me..“ he muttered to himself. „Asking Gabriel to help was your idea Cas.“ The trench-coated angel turned towards Dean.

„I know“, he said sighing. ‘But Gabriel hadn’t appeared. Maybe he wasn’t able to come right now.

„You couldn’t know that Gabriel would be a douche and not show up“ Dean said reassuringly, his soul glowing brightly.  
His grace reacted at the pulse of affection, also expanding and a warm feeling rose in his chest. He reached out with his wings, his feathers lightly grazing Dean’s frame. Green eyes focused entirely on him. 

„We’ll need a plan B“ Sam voiced, the motel-bed creaking, as he stood up. Dean looked away, slightly blushing. 

„And what do you have in mind?“

 

Gabriel eventually joined them. Castiel felt the air shift, as he appeared next to him, inside of the black Impala.  
„Got your message. Where are Samsquatch and your boyfriend?“ the Trickster asked, as if nothing had happened. Cas couldn’t help, but being angry. He hadn’t looked away from Crowley’s mansion.

„They are inside. To steal the colt from the King of Crossroads! Where have you been?!“ he said, his wings twitching in annoyance.

„Hey, you think it’s easy to just disappear? Kali had my blood... Why aren’t you with them?“ Gabriel asked.

„The warding.“ Gabriel’s attention shifted towards the house. „Ellen and Jo are helping. They are hunters.“

„Hmm. I think i could get through the warding, if things get worse.“ Gabriel replied. „How is Azrael, by the way?“ 

„I don’t know. We haven’t seen him for a while.“ Cas replied. Gabriel looked at him and frowned. 

„And what is he doing all the time?“ The Trickster asked.

„I don’t know.“ Castiel said. His attention shifted, when Ellen and Jo came out of the building, followed by Dean and Sam. The latter carrying the Colt, nobody seemed to be injured, beside a few bruises. Despite their success, they wore a thoughtful expression. Ellen and Jo walked towards their car and the Winchesters approached the beloved Impala. Castiel could hear them discuss something. „Then he knows, does it make a difference?“ Dean said to his brother, who sighed.  
„Look... We need to plan what we’ll do next. He will obviously try to talk to Lucifer. The question is, will we go to Carthage?“ But his brother didn’t answer. Sam had spotted Gabriel. 

„Now? Now you show up?“ Sam snorted and turned to ignore the Trickster. Obviously, he was angry.

„Oh the mighty one, thanks for your help.“ Dean said and also entered the car. 

„You got the colt, didn’t you.“, Gabriel said. Cas watched the exchange. 

„No thanks to you.“ 

Gabriel snapped up a chocolate-bar and began to eat it. The engine rumbled and they drove off. „We are going back to Bobby’s“, Dean added after a moment of silence. It was an awkward ride. Sam was radiating annoyance. Gabriel was smart enough, to keep his mouth shut. And Dean looked firmly at the road.  
He could have read his thoughts, but that would be invading his personal space. They had talked about that. Personal space... that was something Dean didn’t seem to care about that much anymore. But lately Dean seemed a little off. He wanted to help, but he didn’t know what Dean was struggling with.  
While he was driving, Dean recalled their meeting with Crowley.  
With Jo’s help, they’d entered the Mansion. While Cas had watched the entrance, Ellen and Jo cleared the house and he and Sam would looked for the Colt. They were lucky. Sam had drawn a Devil’s trap and he had cut the wiring of the power supply. They had met the Demon on their conditions but then everything went south.

“It's Crowley, right?“ his brother asked the Demon.

“So. The Hardy Boys finally found me. Took you long enough“, the demon said. Sam was holding Ruby’s knife, ready to react if something should happen. While the shotgun in his hands wouldn’t really kill Crowley, the familiar weight was reassuring. The Demon approached them and stopped. His look focused on something on the floor. ‘Fuck... The trap’  
It was rumpled. The rug, on which they’d drawn a devil’s trap. Crowley looked underneath.

“Do you have any idea how much this rug cost?“, the Demon said. In this moment, Dean heard something behind him move. He turned around, but it was to late. Two men, probably Demons, disarmed him and Sam. Their arms were now pinned behind their backs. Crowley showed them the Colt. “This is it, right? This is what it's all about.“, he said waving with the gun. ‘Now it was over, they were fucked. Hopefully Ellen and Jo had gotten out.’

Crowley aimed the gun at him. ‘At least not Sammy’, Dean thought. But then Crowley adjusted his aim and he could hear a bullet flying by. The Demon behind him fell to the floor and a second later, the one holding Sam was also dead. ‘The Hell was happening here?!’

“We need to talk. Privately.“ Crowley walked away, he and Sam following. 

“What the hell is this?“, Dean asked.

“Do you know how deep I could have buried this thing?“ Crowley said. He waved a hand and the door behind them slammed shut. Dean flinched. ‘Fucker’ 

“There's no reason you or anyone should know this even exists, except that I told you.“

„You told us.“ Sam said raising an eyebrow.

“Rumors, innuendo, sent out on the grapevine.“

“Why? Why tell us anything?“ his brother asked. Crowley aimed again at Dean. ‘He wouldn’t kill him. He could have done it earlier and hadn’t.’ So he just looked at the gun.

“I want you to take this thing to Lucifer and empty it into his face.“ Crowley said.

“Uh-huh, okay, and why exactly would you want the devil dead?“ ‘A demon. Really.’

“It's called—“ Crowley put down the gun. „Survival. Well, I forgot you two at best are functioning morons—“

“You're functioning...morons...“ Dean answered.

“Lucifer isn't a demon, remember? He's an angel. An angel famous for his hatred of humankind. To him, you're just filthy bags of pus. If that's the way he feels about you, what can he think about us?“

“But he created you.“, Sam said.

“To him, we're just servants. Cannon fodder. If Lucifer manages to exterminate humankind, we're next. So, help me, huh? Let's all go back to simpler, better times, back to when we could all follow our natures. I'm in sales, dammit! So what do you say if I give you this thing, and you go kill the devil?“ Crowley held out the Colt, handle first.  
‘It couldn’t be that easy. This had to be some kind of trap.’ Dean shared a look with Sam. Crowley wriggled the gun. An obvious invitation. Sam hesitantly reached out and took it.

“Great.“ Sam said looking at Dean. A silent question. ‘Yeah it was better to kill him’ He nodded in approval.

„Great.“ Crowley replied. Sam put the barrel between Crowley’s eyes and pulled the trigger. Dean waited for the killing blow. It clicked. Sam stared at Crowley, surprised and the Demon stared back, impassive. It wasn’t loaded.

“Oh, yeah, right, you'll probably need some more ammunition.“ The demon said as he went behind his desk and opened a drawer. Dean was curious. Crowley obviously didn’t know, that the Colt wouldn’t kill the Devil, but still. ‘Why was he doing this?’ “Oh, uh, excuse me for asking, but aren't you kind of signing your own death warrant? I mean, what happens to you if we go up against the devil and lose?“, the older Winchester asked.

“Number one, he's going to wipe us all out anyway. Two, after you leave here, I go on an extended vacation to all points nowhere. And three, how about you don't miss, okay! Morons!“

Crowley threw something at Dean, who catched and opend it. It was the bullets for the Colt. Dean looked up. 

„Thursday, birdies tell me, there's an appointment in Carthage, Missouri. Also, keep eye open for an Angel. He visited me earlier today. He is on your trail. I don’t know why he’s looking for you.“ Crowley said. 

„Who was it?“ Sam asked taking a step forward.

„Said he was Luci’s older brother, if you know who I mean.“ Crowley said and disappeared.

„Michael...“ Dean whispered. ‘He had found him.’ Cold anxiety rising from his stomach.

„No.“ Sam said thoughtful. „It could also be Azrael. Michael doesn’t have a vessel.“

„You don’t know that.“ Dean said only partly reassured. 

„Yes we do. Don’t you think all of heaven would be informed? Cas would have told us.“

„Yeah. Yeah you are right, but that makes another problem...“ Dean said, trying to distract him from his thoughts about Michael. „Azrael knows, why didn’t he stop us?“

„He probably thinks, we can’t kill Lucifer that way anyways“

„Maybe..“ Sam picked up Ruby’s knife and they looked for Ellen and Jo.  
Dean was pulled from his thoughts and brought back to the Car, when Cas had started to talk. „Is everything alright?“, the Angel asked and put a hand on his shoulder. Dean felt the tension of the day leaving him and he relaxed into the touch. He glanced at Sam next to him and listened to Gabriel’s munching. He leaned slightly forward, the hand sliding of his shoulder. „Yeah Cas I’m fine.“ He picked a new cassette and pushed play, to explain his movement. He felt kinda bad for evading Cas like this, but he wouldn’t start whining with Sam and Gabriel listening. Ironically the tunes of Ozzy Osbourne’s Mr. Crowley started to fill the air. There was no talking, till they arrived at Bobby’s, but he felt Cas staring at him for the rest of the ride.  
They were greeted by Bobby and soon, they were all assembled around the kitchen table. The Colt in the middle of it. 

„At least you got the Colt.“ Bobby said. 

„Yes, but Azrael knows, that we wanted to get it...“ Sam said. Gabriel raised an eyebrow. 

„The question is now, if we are going to Carthage. If he warns Lucifer...“ Dean interfered.

„That’s an stupid idea. I don’t think he does. He just want’s to talk...Whatever that means.“ Bobby said. „What’s up with you?“, he said looking at Gabriel, who was frowning.

„Could he...?“, the Trickster muttered. 

„Who?“ Sam asked, Gabriel looked up. 

„Nothing“, the Trickster replied. 

‘Yeah right, nothing.’ Dean thought sarcastically.

„So, Carthage... are we going?“ Jo asked.

„I doesn’t really make sense. We can’t kill him. It’s better to stay out of his way right now.“, Dean said.

„Even Crowley knew, that he would be there...“ Sam said thoughtful.

„He’s a Demon. The King of Crossroads. Most Demons probably know, where he is.“ Ellen said. 

„Or something big is up“ his brother said. 

„We don’t know that“ Dean said, but Sam was probably right. They had looked into the signs. It blinked like a Christmas-tree with revelation omens. 

„I know, what Lucifer is doing in Carthage.“ Gabriel said. "My time with the pagans was very informative."

„What would that be?“ Sam asked. 

„He will try to raise Death.“ Gabriel said. 

„Death?“ Ellen asked.

„The horsemen. Lucifer will try and bind him to his will.“, Cas said. Ellen and Jo were left speechless.

„You said the ritual is divided into two parts. The summoning and binding. What if we can shift the binding part to one of us?“ Bobby said, looking at Gabriel. 

„Could be possible. But we would have to distract Lucifer.“ Gabriel said.

„Well, Azrael wants to talk to him anyways...“ Dean said. „And we always have the Colt.“

„What do you need?“ Bobby asked Gabriel. 

„Mostly time, the rest, I can do on my own. And the timing has to be right.“ Gabriel said, but he seemed distracted.

„That means, that we are going against the Devil. Could be our last night on earth.“ Ellen said. Gabriel was again frowning and looking around. 

„What’s going on?“ Dean asked him, but he was ignored.

„As if I don’t...“, Gabriel muttered. „I perfected this art! Get your feathery ass down that plane!“ The last part was said out loud. 

„Wha..“ Dean started. Even Cas looked at Gabriel confused. But in this moment, Azrael appeared right next to Jo, who almost jumped at the surprise. He grinned like the bastard that he was and patted Gabriel on the shoulder. 

„Nice work, Gabriel. Almost thought, that I could get away with it.“ Azrael said.

„You were spying on us!“ Sam said indignantly. Azrael turned around, smile vanishing from his face. 

„Of course I were. As if I didn’t know that you were planning something! Very nice from you to tell me, by the way.“ 

„Do I hear some sarcasm shining through?“ Gabriel said. Azrael turned away from Sam. 

„Shut up Gabriel. You have no room to talk.“ He turned back, facing everybody. „You could have talked to me, you know. I knew that you wanted a plan B. Maybe I would have even helped. My only condition would have been, that you let me talk to him first.“

„I’m sorry“ Gabriel said. 

„You are the only brother, that I have left right now. I didn’t think, that you would betray me like that...“ and in this moment, he looked utterly heartbroken.  
‘Maybe Azrael wasn’t that optimistic at all... He was just someone who wanted his family back.’ Dean was oddly reminded of the time, he had tried to keep Sam and Dad from fighting and Sam had run away...  
Azrael walked into the other room. He could see him sitting down in one of the ugly armchairs, that were still standing in the library.  
„At least he didn’t vanish.“ Sam said, to cheer up Gabriel, who seemed oddly silent.

„Yeah...“ Gabriel said and he went after Azrael.  
Dean looked at Cas, who stood next to him. „What do you think? Should we challenge Ellen to a drinking battle?“, he said to escape the strange mood.

In the meantime Gabriel had arrived in the Living room. He sat down on the pink armchair in front of Azrael, who only looked at him.  
„I’m sorry. I should have told you.“ Gabriel watched Azrael, as he sat silent on his chair. His wings weren’t hanging as low, as they did before, but they weren't still that relaxed, as he was used to it by now. 

„I know, why you didn’t tell me. You thought I would be angry.“, Azrael said, rolling something between his fingers. „Nevertheless you should have.“ 

„What’s that?“ Gabriel asked, nodding at this silvery thing.  
Azrael smiled a little smile. „It’s a bullet. Crowley tried to shoot me.“

„Did he hit you?“, Gabriel asked with a slightly concerned voice. ‘While a bullet out of the colt couldn’t kill an Archangel, it could still damage the grace.’

„No. I caught it.“ Azrael said, smiling a short smile. „You know, I think you were right. I would have been angry, if you told me. Well, I’m still angry, but...“ He made a short pause to gather the right words. Gabriel watched him, as he let the bullet float between his fingers and then let it return to his hand rolling it another time between his palms. It seemed to calm him down. „Everybody seems to think, that Lucifer is lost. That he is that twisted evil person, filled to the brim with hate. I never thought that. But now... I have doubts.“ Gabriel listened silently. „You are different. Raphael is different. Hell, I have not even spoken to Michael yet. What if they are right? And he will not hear me out. It’s possible, that he doesn’t even recognize me, like Raphael.“

Gabriel was shocked. „Raph didn’t know it was you?“

„He thought, that I was Lucifer... I was so sure of myself. What should I do, if I fail?“

„You help us. Get him back in the cage, he was put.“ Gabriel said. ‘Azrael was hurt, but he needed to take that chance. He needed his brother.’

„I don’t know if I can do that Gabriel“ Azrael’s bright eyes were staring right into his.

„Tomorrow, you are going to talk to him. He want’s to bind Death. We need to prevent that. You can talk to him, but please. If that doesn’t work, help us.  
Distract him. Humanity doesn’t deserve that fate.“ And Gabriel meant what he said. Azrael smiled at that. 

„This vessel, my last body. He, I... I used to carry a coin around. I played with it all the time. I threw it away, when I regained my memories. I carried it inside my pack of cigarettes.“ Gabriel listened with interest. Azrael hadn’t told him much about his human lives. 

„That’s why you kept that?“ Gabriel looked at the bullet. 

„Nah. I think that it could be useful someday. Even if I only give it back to Crowley one day. You know, to remind him, that he owes me something.“ Gabriel grinned at that.  
„You are a sneaky bastard, you know that?“ Azrael only smirked.

In the other room, the drinking battle between Cas, Dean and Ellen had become a drinking battle between Cas and Ellen, after Cas had mentioned, that a two against one game wouldn’t be fair. Ellen had protested, but after Bobby said, that she wouldn’t have a chance against an Angel anyways, she wanted to test that for herself.  
Now Dean was standing next to Sam and watched Ellen, as she downed her fifth shot.  
„All right big boy.“ She said to Cas, who sat opposite of her, also five shot glasses in front of him. But his were still full. 

„Well“, he said and drained all five of his in a row. Dean smirked at Ellen’s unbelieving stare. 

„I think, I’m starting to feel something“, Cas said. Jo gawked and then grinned. Sam next to him also smiled. 

„Well, told you so...“, Bobby said and shot a short glance inside the Library, in which the two archangels were sitting.  
Sam noticed the papers on the shelf next to Dean. 

„What’s that?“, he asked. 

„Bobby found out. These are about Carthage. There’s been six missing persons reported, since Sunday. The Devils definitively there.“ Sam nodded. 

„But we knew that already.“

„Yeah, but you know how he is.“ Dean paused for a moment. „Look, when you think about it...you can’t come with.“ ‘Oh no, Sam rolled his eyes. His bitchface was rapidly approaching.’

„Dean“, his brother said.  
‘He knew this voice. It meant, that Sam thought, that he was being stupid.’ „Look“, he said, to persuade his brother. „I know that we have two, well at least one Archangel on our side, but apart from this... I go against Satan and screw the pooch, okay. We’ve lost a game piece. That we can take. But if you’re there, then we are handing the devil’s vessel right over to him. That’s not smart.“

„Since when have we ever done anything smart. And besides, Azrael said, that he wouldn’t really need me. He already has a vessel.“

„That doesn’t mean, that he doesn’t want to wear you to prom. I’m serious Sam.“

„So am I. Haven’t we learned a damn thing? If we’re gonna do this, we’re gonna do it together.“ Sam stared at him. Dean broke the eye-contact first. 

‘Sam was right.’ „But it’s a stupid frigging idea.“ His attention was caught by Ellen, Cas and Jo. 

„Boy, talk about stupid ideas.“, Sam said.

„Good God. True, that.“ Dean’s attention had been caught by Jo. He thought about approaching her, when in the corner of his eye, he saw that stupid trench-coat. Cas smiled at something Ellen had said. One of the rare ones, only reserved for people, he really liked. Dean changed his goal and sat down next to Cas. „How is it going?“, he asked Cas. The angel wanted to answer, but he was cut off by the female hunter.

„He can drink. That’s for sure“, Ellen said. 

„She is not going to admit it, but she is losing“ Jo said, coming from the fridge, a new beer in her hand, as she sat down next to Ellen. 

„Shut up, Child.“ Ellen replied, but she was smiling. 

„Everybody get in here! It’s time for the lineup. Usual suspects in the corner.“ Bobby was calling from the living room. Azrael seemed to have calmed down at least. 

„Oh come on, Bobby. Nobody wants their picture taken.“ Ellen said. 

„Hear, hear.“ Sam added.

„Shut up. You are drinking my beer.“ 

„The old man’s right“ Gabriel said from his chair. 

„Who are you calling old here?“ Bobby replied. „Anyway, I’m gonna need something to remember your sorry asses by.“ Bobby said, fiddling with a camera. The archangels had also joined their small group. The Trickster had walked towards them immediately and stood next to Sam. Azrael had joined them with a sigh, as Gabriel shot him a pleading look. The picture was taken, and only interrupted by a not very manly „Huh!“ coming from Sam. 

„Ho, Samsquatch, I thought you were more open“, Gabriel said grinning. Azrael also laughed out loud now. 

„That doesn’t mean, that you can just grope my butt!“, his brother said. Dean burst out into loud laughter and so did Jo and Ellen. Even Bobby couldn’t hide his amusement and a smile tugged at the corners of Cas’ mouth.

„What now?“ Ellen asked, after the laughter had silenced. 

„We should go to bed, get some sleep. After all, tomorrow we face the Devil“ Bobby said. 

„No, you can’t go to sleep. We were having so much fun“ Gabriel interfered. Dean saw Azrael raising an eyebrow, but he looked still amused. 

„What do you suggest, then?“ Bobby said.

„I know a few Casinos. Someone in Las Vegas still owes me-“ Gabriel started but was interrupted by Sam.

„The hell am I going to a Casino with you.“ Dean wasn’t really opposed to that idea, but his thoughts were interrupted by Jo. 

„We could just stay“

„Fine“, Gabriel sighed after a moment of silence and ported himself into the kitchen, judging the noise of somebody rummaging through the fridge. Azrael snapped up some kind of whisky and fixed himself a drink. Dean shrugged at Sam, grabbing his beer bottle and going into the kitchen. Cas did the same.  
Dean didn’t know, why Gabriel bothered with rummaging through the fridge, when he could snap up food out of thin air, but who was he to judge. The Trickster pulled out some leftover cake. ‘Who would buy cake, if he could have pie?’ He sat down on the table, and the archangel looked at them. He wriggled his eyebrows suggestively, then Gabriel wandered off into the other room. Dean rolled his eyes at Gabriel. Cas just stood there confused. „Just sit down, Cas. Relax for a bit.“, the older Winchester said, nodding at the chair in front of him.

„Tomorrow we are facing the Devil. That thought isn’t very relaxing.“ Nevertheless he sat down. He watched Dean intently. „Are you really okay? You seem a little off lately“ Dean took a sip of his beer.

„Honestly? I don’t know.“ He turned to look in the library. Jo and Gabriel were talking, Ellen watching like a hawk from behind. Azrael was still in his chair, and Bobby and Sam were hovering over some kind of book. The thought, that Michael had found him was still sitting in his bones. But as he saw Castiel sitting there, as he looked at him with concern, he asked himself another question. „How are you Cas? How are you dealing with all this?“, he said, waving with his bottle.

Cas sighed. „Nobody knows what will happen tomorrow. Azrael could be successful in talking Lucifer out of the Apocalypse. But he could also fail. Death could be in Lucifer’s hands. Tomorrow we could all be dead, or the Apocalypse could have ended.“

„What do you think will happen?“

„We will give our best, to save the ones we love and to save humanity. If I should die tomorrow, it would because of a worthy cause.“

„You would die because of humanity? You would sacrifice yourself?“ Dean asked, shocked, that that thought scared him as much, as losing Sam to Lucifer. Cas looked at him and he hesitated to answer. Just as Cas opened his mouth to give an answer, they were interrupted by the voices in the Library, accompanied with loud laughter mixed with music. 

„No, no. You have to do it like this!“ Ellen’s voice sounded through the rooms. He could hear Sam’s familiar laughter and as he turned around, he could also see Jo smirking at Bobby, who danced with Ellen. Well, tried to at least. 

„If you think, that you can do it better...“ Bobby said to Sam, whose gigantic form dwarfed Ellen, as he took the offered hand. She also smiled. They started dancing and Dean had to admit, that Sam wasn’t that bad. The two Archangel’s watched amused, as the pair was dancing in the middle of Bobby’s living room. Dean turned around again, only to notice Cas’ curious expression.

„Come on“, he said and indicated Cas to follow him into the Library. Dean leaned against a shelf and watched Cas, as he observed Ellen and Sam. 

„Let me try again.“ Bobby said and took a step forward. Ellen laughed and so did Sam. His younger brother took a step back, and he stopped next to Jo. 

„Where did you learn to dance?“, she asked him.

„Jess“, Sam said with a fond smile. „She wanted to learn how to dance properly and she needed a dancing partner.“

„I only know the basics. I don’t think, that I have ever danced like that.“, Jo replied. 

„May I help you with that?“, Gabriel suddenly said from the side. Jo laughed and agreed. Soon they also whirled over the improvised dance floor. Azrael approached Cas. 

„I can teach you how to dance, you know?“, he said smirking. Cas glanced at Dean shortly. „That would be nice“, he said and Azrael immediately started to show him the basics. A strange feeling arouse in him, as he watched the two angels, but soon Cas was dancing with Ellen, Jo with Sam and Azrael with Gabriel, which was by the way very funny to watch. „Gabriel, I swear, if you keep trying to mojo up a string quartet, I will shove it up your ass.“, but it wasn’t said with much venom in the voice.  
Dean was content, watching the others dance, but soon, he was also pulled into the dancing crowd. He didn’t know, how he ended there. One moment, he had been dancing with Jo, the next she had switched partners, to dance with her mother and he stood there, a hand on Cas’ back and explaining to him, how he had to move his feet. „No, like this...Yeah, now you’ve got it“ A little smile tugged on Cas’ lips as they danced. And suddenly, he wasn’t the one in charge anymore and Cas had the lead. 

„Like this, Dean?“, he asked with his gravelly voice. 

„Yeah“, Dean answered swallowing, as he looked at the slightly smaller guy. All silliness disappearing. He was now very aware, how close they stood. He could feel Cas’ breath on his face, unearthly blue eyes staring into the bottom of his soul. Dean noticed, that he didn’t care, that they stood that close. Every previous rule of personal space thrown over board. His best friend smiled at him, and Dean smiled back, air escaping his lungs, he hadn’t realized he had been holding. As he took in Cas’ features, the sharp cheekbones, the dark stubble and the unruly hair, his focus always shifted back to the eyes. The eyes that spoke of power, shining bright with grace and that were really and truly the part, that made Cas, well Cas. Jimmy didn’t look like Cas at all. He wasn’t the Angel that he had known, since he had been pulled out of hell.  
And as he looked at his friend, it hit him like a brick. ‘Holy shit. He loved him. He was in love with Cas!’

„Is everything alright?“, the angel asked him. Dean hadn’t realized, that he had stopped dead at that realization. He swallowed, seeing everything now in a new light. „Yeah.“, he said, as he regained his voice. „Yeah. I just realized, that it must be really late. Tomorrow’s a big day. We should really go to bed.“ Cas looked at him as if he doubted his statement,but let go.

„Dean is right.“, said Ellen. „It’s time for us to get some sleep“ They turned off the music and Gabriel snapped away the disco ball, that had found its way into Bobby’s living room, despite Azrael’s threats.  
He walked up the stairs in a haze. ‘He was in love with Cas. Holy fucking shit. Gabriel had made a lot of allusions. Hell, everybody had. Everyone had seemed to get it, except for himself.’ Dean wiped his face with one hand. ‘He didn’t even know what to do with this information. Hell, he had always seen Cas as a friend. Then there had been Lisa and now... well, if he thought about it, he had always found Cas attractive. Well, maybe back in his teenage years, it had not only been a phase?’ Dean couldn’t deal with that right now. ‘Wasn’t there still this bottle of whisky in the guest room? Well, that bottle wouldn’t last much longer. He would need to get at least some sleep that night... That realization had to come to him at the most unwanted time.’

While all the humans went to bed, the angels remained awake. Bobby had offered Ellen and Jo his room, saying that he could always sleep on the couch. Azrael wished the hunter a good night and fluttered outside, not wanting to be thrown out by the man.  
Sitting on the roof of some old car again, he watched the stars. Soon, he was joined by Gabriel and even Cas. Miraculously, even Gabriel stayed silent. Not counting the chewing noised, he made, as he ate his chocolate.  
Somewhere else, another archangel looked at the same stars, as he gathered demons, to prepare for the rising of Death. Lucifer looked into the dark space. ‘No real life up there. Not like here on earth. The little planet, not much bigger, than himself. Yet his father had chosen, to make it the center of all of his creation. Humans everywhere. Soon his brother would come and fight him.’ His grace inside him twisted angrily. ‘He hadn’t seen Michael, since he had locked him up. Even he couldn’t repress the shiver, that ran down his back at the thought of the cage.’ He shoved that thoughts away. ‘He had nothing to do right now. Demons were possessing every single person in this town. He didn’t really care about them. Lucifer had once cared too much and he hadn’t gotten anything in return. Only a dark cage. He was excited to meet Death again. Death was an asshole, but he kinda liked him anyways. He reminded him of his oldest brother. But he had pushed that memories as far away, as he could. Back then, he had still believed, that his father had done the right thing. That Azrael had been manipulated by the darkness, that he would be used by her and that he would harm him, or someone else in that process. That it was better to keep him away from all that. But then his father had taken away Azrael’s grace and stuffed him into this tiny human. This being, so much lesser than everything that ever had existed, now hosted his brother! Lucifer had been shocked.’ He was pulled from his thoughts, when a demon approached him. Meg she called herself. Her Hellhound’s accompanying her. 

„Father?“ She said. Lucifer hated that, but he needed the Demons. „You said I should inform myself about the Winchesters.“ 

„Yes“ 

„Well, apparently, a few of Crowley’s people knew, that they are traveling with two angels. What should we do? We can’t fight them on our own.“

„Who said, that you would fight?“ Lucifer snapped his fingers and a jar appeared filled with holy oil. He threw it towards the Demon, who caught it. „Set a trap...“  
He turned back to the stars and his eyes found the almost full moon. Tomorrow, he would raise Death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any mistakes, I know there are some. I will read through, when it's finished, but everytime I'm uploading a chapter I am just so damn tired. Well, feel free to leave comments. Sorry that you had to wait for so long.


	10. Choices I (Abandon all Hope)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Team-Free-Will together with Gabriel, Azrael and the Harvelles arrive in Carthage, but there are things, they didn't expect. Well, things go south quickly.
> 
> (Also a lot of Destiel, YAY)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to post that chapter spontaneously. Originally this is the first half of another chapter, but I thought why not. Better late then never and so you get a chapter this week. The next will be posted on tuesday, it's already finished. I'm sorry that I made a pause last week, but I wanted to get this chapter right and I took my time writing it, because I wanted to be really sure about what I wanted to write into the storyline. At least it was twice as long, so I hope you didn't mind.

Chapter 10:  
(Abandon all Hope) 

Cas, Azrael and Gabriel were still sitting outside, in Bobby’s backyard, looking at the stars. They watched as they wandered and the time ran by. From the inside of the house, Castiel could hear the breathing of his human charges and he made out Deans even breathing. When he was sure, that his friends were asleep and secure, he shifted his attention towards his siblings.  
At first, he had felt, like he was intruding some kind of moment. So Cas was surprised, when he suddenly felt wings brushing against his. As he looked up, he could see, that Azrael had draped his dark wings around him and the other Archangel. At least, as much, as it was possible, because Gabriel’s wings were squeezed tightly, almost matching Azrael’s in size.

„What’s the plan for tomorrow?“, Gabriel asked after a while, disturbing the silence. Like Gabriel, Castiel looked at the dark haired Archangel. 

Azrael stayed silent for a moment, then he answered. „I want to know what Lucifer is like now. I am going to talk to him. I want to understand him.“ 

„What if he is determent to destroy humanity?“ Gabriel asked. „What if he wouldn’t refrain from killing us, to get to his goal?“ Cas listened actively.

Azrael wings even got closer and then suddenly, as if the Archangel had just realized, what he was doing, gave them space, but the wings were still hovering over them in a slightly shielding position. „If he really would be lost, I would try to help you stop him.“ Gabriel nodded in acknowledgement.

A few hours passed, but Cas suddenly felt uneasy.The distant feelings of emotions, that were not his, and a familiar tugging on his grace, let him shift his attention. Inside of Bobby’s house, he could make out the mostly even breathing of four humans and one, that was a bit off. Dean.  
A short look to the side and Castiel fluttered off and appeared in Dean’s room. Castiel looked at the freckled face of his friend. The Hunter was sleeping, but Cas felt, that he was having nightmares again. Since he had raised the righteous man from hell and rebuilt his body, he and Dean were connected. His Grace had made Dean whole again, knitted his flesh together and nestled the bright soul back into its host. He had left a mark upon Dean. And Dean on him. The lines between their beings had been so blurry back then, when he had pulled this soul out of Hell. Often at nights, Dean would unconsciously reach out for him, when he was dreaming of the pit.  
How much he had changed since he had met the Winchesters. A deep sadness overcame him as he looked at Dean. He didn’t deserve all this suffering.  
He lowered his hand and put it onto Deans forehead, reaching out with his grace and connecting their minds. 

The stench of sulphur, rot and foulness hit him. He was experiencing the dream, like Dean remembered Hell.  
Like most people though, Hell wasn’t only flames and people burning in them. It was a warping, always changing landscape for the people, who were suffering down there. Some Demons could control it to a certain extent and if they were experts in manipulating the mind too, they were known as Hell’s best torturers. 

Alastair had possessed both of this attributes. But with his talent of reading people and the reputation of someone, who actually liked to stay in the pit, he was one of the most feared Demons in Hell.  
It was not all about carving up a soul. If you could manipulate Hell itself, it opened up much more possibilities. From what Castiel had seen in Dean’s dreams by now, one day it looked like you were back at home, safely with your family only to relive your worst memories. And other times, it was only pure pain. Every soul, who was still self aware, possessed some kind of body downstairs. Only if they had been turned into Demons, the souls would leave their familiar form behind, only forming a body if the Demon wanted too. Castiel had seen hundreds upon thousands, of souls, half twisted, flickering and warping from their human form, to a shapeless being and back. Not turned into a Demon yet, but humanity left far behind. 

Right now, there was Dean standing in front of a rack, inside of a room, that could have been out of the middle ages. A damned soul was squirming there, trying to get away and Alastair stood behind Dean, whispering in his ear with a smooth voice. „I thought, this time we are going a bit classy style.“, and the Demon guided Deans hand towards the other soul. Deans fingers closed around a shiny blade. „See that little bitch there, screaming and writhing? And we haven’t even started yet.“ Dean trembled. 

„I don’t think, that I can do this...“ he said swallowing. 

„Well It’s your decision. We can just handle this like the last two times you backed out. You can always change places with that poor bastard.“ Alastair said, like he didn’t care at all.  
Dean dreamed this dream quite often. It was the first time, he had shed blood in Hell. The first time,he had taken a step forward and cut into another soul. Sometimes in his dreams, the nameless soul wore the face of Bobby, sometimes Sam and sometimes even Deans own face. Cas knew, that after that, Dean hadn’t touched another soul, for what had been almost a year down there, but the line had already been crossed. 

„Shh, it’s okay Dean.“ Cas whispered into his mind and Dean looked up, pulled out of his old memory, the scene fading into the background as he was slowly gaining some awareness. 

„Cas?“, he said with teary eyes.

„It’s okay Dean. It’s okay“ Castiel said, letting his grace wash soothingly through Deans mind, and banishing the memories of Hell. He filled Deans mind with pleasant thoughts and pulled a memory of Dean and Sam into focus. One of the rare moments, in which they had not to worry about a hunt and they had only been children. 

Deans soul curled around his grace with affection and Castiel smiled as he retreated from Deans mind, grace lingering for a moment longer fondly nudging back for a last time. Cas knew that the hunter wouldn’t remember this encounter in the morning and neither would he remember the dream. But for now, the frown on Deans forehead had vanished, and peaceful look made itself noticeably on the freckled face.  
Cas remained in the room for a few more second but then he left. Dean wouldn’t approve of him, if he was ‘watching like a creep’ the whole time Dean was sleeping. 

Once outside again, he had joined the other angels, who were discussing if they should fly to Carthage or drive with the car. It seemed like Azrael was giving in, because he didn’t care anyways and Gabriel insisted, that it didn’t matter when they would arrive, if they only would arrive before midnight.  
The rest of the night had passed quickly and the stars disappeared in the increasing light of the rising sun. 

They had driven to Carthage, just like Castiel had thought. The drive was mostly shaped by Gabriel’s random appearances, as he popped up in this and one time in that Car and the sudden changes of music. Also one incident involving Sam, flowers, a lot of cursing, braided hair and the slightest hint of a smile on Deans face, accompanied by the roaring laughter of Gabriel. Also there was a two hour delay, because Dean said, if they didn’t stop at the next bar, he would probably try to kill the Trickster, after Gabriel had decided, that it was now Deans turn as the victim. 

Seriousness took over, as they approached Carthage. It was, as if they had entered a ghost town. The posters of missing people were everywhere, but what disturbed Castiel the most were the Reapers. They were everywhere. 

 

Azrael had felt the familiar energy long before they’d entered Carthage. It was not the one, he had expected, but he knew it. He sat in silence, on the backseat of Ellen’s Car, Jo riding shotgun, banning Gabriel to annoy Cas and the Winchesters, when Gabriel had - successfully - tried to shove Azrael into a side dimension, to quote the Trickster: „to see if he could do it“, and watched everything. As soon as they arrived in the City, Sam and Dean pulled out their phones. 

„You getting a signal?“, Azrael heard Sam ask Dean in the car in front of him. 

„No, nothing. Nice and spooky.“ Dean waved with his hand to get Ellen’s attention, who stopped next to the Impala. 

„Place seem a little empty to you?“ Ellen said.

„Empty?“ Gabriel snorted, suddenly appearing in front of their cars. Reapers stood on the road, every roof and inside of the buildings focused on something in the distance. That was, what Azrael had felt previously. Since his first incident with Richard, he noticed every Reaper around. Usually he let them be. It felt wrong to him, to disturb them when they were collecting souls. It was a rare occurrence, to find more than one in a single city. But in this town..., he felt hundreds of them.

„You see any people around here??“ Sam asked sarcastically, bitchface on point. Obviously he wasn’t over the hair incident yet, that Azrael had witnessed earlier.

„If you count Reapers as people, sure.“ Gabriel said shrugging, but Azrael noticed the tension in his voice. His wings twitched nervously. Azrael fluttered off, appearing next to Gabriel, bumping his shoulder in a reassuring way. 

„Reapers? As in more than one?“ Ellen asked.

„Well, Lucifer is trying to raise Death. That could explain it“ Dean added, as he looked around, although he couldn’t see any of the creatures. But while the humans had talked, the Angels stopped dead in their tracks. Every single Reaper had turned around and was now looking at Azrael. They seemed just as confused, as Gabriel and Castiel were. Azrael took a step forward. 

„Where is he?“, the angel asked the Reapers. None of them answered out loud, but they turned their heads, all looking at the same building. A strange fondness overcame Azrael as he looked at these beings, not quite Angels but still very similar in their essence. 

„Thank you“ Azrael turned to look at Gabriel for a last time, now he needed some kind of support, then he flew away, aiming for the house.

 

Gabriel stood at the same place, he had been one second ago. But Azrael had disappeared. After a last brushing of wings, a gesture of trust and comfort, the other Angel had flown off, trusting this Reapers. Creepy. The way they had reacted... Well Azrael was the Angel of Death, but that... Gabriel couldn’t shake off his uneasy feeling, as his brother had disappeared to talk to Lucifer. They had discussed this first, but now... He had to focus on the plan. If he didn’t want to face Lucifer, he couldn’t help Azrael at all. 

„I hope he is lucky“, Jo said, what broke the silence. 

„Was he talking to the Reapers?“, Sam asked. 

„Yeah“ Gabriel said, still a bit shaken.

„We are gonna go check out the PD. You guys stay here, see if you can find anybody. Maybe there are still some people around“, Dean said ready to drive off. This pulled Gabriel out of his stupor. 

„Hell no. You are not going to mess up the plan. We are going to this farm and set up the trap.“ Gabriel said.

„You wanna let people die? They will need help.“ Sam replied angrily.

„If there are still people here“ Gabriel added. 

„You can’t sense anyone either?“ Cas asked.

„The Reapers mess with the energy“, Gabriel said directed to Cas. „But we don’t have time, if we want to be able to take over the ritual.“  
„You said it would only take about ten minutes to do that.", Sam said.

"It's better to be prepared", Gabriel answered.

"Then me and Sam are looking for survivors and you guys are going to this Jasper guy’s farm“, Dean said. 

„Have you ever seen a horror movie?!“ Gabriel replied.

„I live one most of the time“, he muttered, but the Trickster ignored him.

„Splitting up is what gets you killed! If you are so keen on searching the town, I’m gonna do it. At least I should be able to look after myself.“

„Fine“ Ellen said, ending the discussion, and cutting off Sam, who had wanted to say something.

„We’ll meet at the farm. And you look after them, Cassie.“ the Trickster said and disappeared to search the town.

 

Lucifer knew that the Winchesters had arrived in Carthage. But the thing he hadn’t expected, was, to be told by the Demon - Meg - whatever, that the Winchester hadn’t only arrived in the company of two, but three Angels. Three! Their own little garrison. 

Originally, he had wanted to talk to Castiel and to the other Angel, whoever that was. Unfortunately his Demons weren’t that good. And he didn’t have the time to approach the Winchesters in person, to find out who the second party was. And he wanted to avoid meeting Michael and his lackeys for as long, as he could. His brother would certainly watch his true vessel, like Lucifer was still keeping an eye on Sam. 

Michael had betrayed him. But that didn’t mean, that he wanted to fight him till death. He still couldn’t bring himself, to kill Michael, after all the things, he had done. He would, if he would have to... but now he would focus on his task. He didn’t have many time, if three Angels were roaming the town. Well, he would need to get at least one out of the way, if he wanted to raise Death. The timing needed to be perfect. Hopefully Meg was able to deal with the other two Angels. He called for a demon and gave him detailed instructions. For his plan to work, he would need to leave this building. After all, he was still an Angel and being blasted away by some stupid blood-sigil wasn’t really helpful.

Shortly after that, he received a prayer from Meg, that one Angel was captured.

 

Gabriel regretted his earlier words. „At least I should be able, to look after myself...“, he muttered, repeating his earlier statement.

„Yeah, surly looks like it.“, the twisted soul next to him said. Standing inside a circle of holy fire, captured by some kind of Demon, he should be happy, that she still hadn’t recognized him as Gabriel. Lucifer would probably be there in an instant, but he was hopefully too occupied with Azrael.

„Now, now buttercups. Why this angry face?“ The Demon said sarcastically, leaning against a wall and watching him attentively. „The father is coming soon to talk with you“ Gabriel just wanted to make a witty, and well chosen remark, when he felt Lucifer arrive. Gabriel watched, as his brother ignored him and approached the Demon instead. 

„You did well. Now go and take care of the others.“

„Yes father“, the Demon said with a devoted look on her face. Gabriel almost laughed about her behaviour, when he remembered, that he had looked up to Lucifer once, the same way. The Demon disappeared and Lucifer turned towards him. When he was shocked to see him, he didn’t really show it. Apart from the jerk of Lucifer’s wings in his direction, almost as if he’d wanted to greet Gabriel, but then they retreated into their common position. 

„Hello Gabriel. I must say, that I didn’t expect you here.“ Lucifer said. „And for a Demon to catch you“ The slightest smile on Lucifer’s lips. Gabriel took his time to look at his brother. His vessel was slowly burning up. And Lucifer’s wings, that once had been the brightest of all of heaven were dull, the slightest hint of sulphur in the air.

„Maybe I wanted to get caught“ Gabriel shot back. 

„Then you wouldn’t admit it.“ Lucifer replied. 

‘Why was Lucifer here, where was Azrael?’ „Where have you left Azrael?“ Gabriel asked as if he didn’t really care. Lucifer’s face darkened and his wings were now tense and shaking. 

„What are you talking about?“, the Devil asked smoothly, but there was a dangerous undertone. 

„Azrael. Our brother. He was there. Wanted to meet you again. Hopeful reunion. The whole program, you know?“ After Gabriel had finished his sentence, Lucifer’s eyes started to glow red. 

„How dare you to lie to me about this, Gabriel. I should kill you right now, but I have things to do.“

„Things to do. You mean raising Death.“ ‘Where the hell was Azrael?!’

„Exactly“ Lucifer said and turned around to leave.

„Lucifer, you’re my brother. And I love you. But you are a great big bag of dicks.“

„Wait, what did you just say to me?“ Lucifer said, turning back to look at the Trickster.

„Look at yourself! Boo hoo! Daddy was mean to me, so I’m gonna smash up all his toys.“

„Watch your tone.“

„Play the victim all you want. But you and me? We know the truth. Dad loved you best. More than Michael, more than me. Then he brought the new baby home and you couldn’t handle it. So this is all just one big temper tantrum. Time to grow up.“, Gabriel said.

„You think it’s all about that? Gabriel, if you’re doing this for Michael...“

„Screw him. If he were standing here, I’d shiv his ass too.“ 

Lucifer seemed speechless for a moment. „Whose side are you on, Gabriel?“, he asked eventually. 

„Not yours and surely not Michael’s side. People.“ Gabriel watched, as Lucifer’s face morphed into a confused expression.

„So you would be willing to die for these ants?“

„Yes“ 

„Why?“

„Because Dad was right. They are better than us.“

„But they are flawed, they are not like us!“ Lucifer said, taking a step forward.

„Do you think, that we are perfect? Aren’t we flawed too? But at least a lot of them try to do better. They forgive. How many Angels do you know, who can do this? Who don’t only follow orders, who think for themselves and act on it. Take responsibility for what they are doing.“ Lucifer didn’t answer that question. Instead he stood in silence, watching him.

„You have changed, Gabriel“, he said after a while. 

„I am not the only one“, the Trickster answered. Lucifer snorted. 

„Yeah. Being all caged up, can do that, you know. But have you ever asked yourself, why God isn’t taking responsibility? He is the one who could end this all. Why don’t you ask him?“

„It’s your choice. Why not change your mind. Leave humanity be.“, the Trickster asked. Lucifer’s wings twitched.

„Leave them be? The earth was a better place without them. They are violent uncaring creatures. They are full of sin. And even if I would consider this, what about Michael? He will still try to kill me. It is written. The Apocalypse has begun.“

Suddenly, the Demon appeared again.

„I got the Winchesters pinned down. For now, at least. What should I do with them?“, she asked.

Lucifer made a short pause. He looked at Gabriel, then he said: „Leave them alone.“

„I-I’m sorry, but are you sure? Shouldn’t we-“ She said hesitantly.

„No“ Lucifer answered. „Trust me child. Everything happens for a reason.“, he added after a moment, to reassure the Demon. Then he turned his attention back to Gabriel. „You have some time to think now. Maybe you change your mind. We could be on the same side, you know?“ Gabriel felt Lucifer disappear. He was left, only in the company of the Demon.

 

After Gabriel had vanished, the Hunters had insisted on, searching for some survivors, while they were heading towards the Farm, where Death would be raised. After a flash of light, in the building Lucifer was supposed to be, they entered and only found a banishing sigil. They left their cars behind and were now walking, shotguns in their hands and looking around for the smallest sign of trouble. „Well this is great“, said Dean. „Been in town twenty minutes and we already lost the Archangels up our sleeve. Azrael has been banished and Gabriel doesn’t answer any prayers.“

„You think, uh, you think Lucifer got him?“ Sam asked, his soul flickering with concern. 

„I don’t know what else it could be.“ Dean answered, but Castiel didn’t listen anymore. Because behind them, he sensed something from the pit. A demon.

„There you are.“, it said, getting the attentions of the humans too, who also turned around.

„Meg“ Sam said. But it wasn’t only Meg. Castiel could make out at least six Hellhounds, surrounding her and there were more.

„Shouldn’t have come here, boys.“, she said smirking.

„Hell, I could say the same thing for you.“ Dean replied and aimed the Colt on her. 

„Dean!“ Castiel interfered as he saw one of the Hellhounds taking a step forward. They only remained still, because Meg was holding them back.

„Your little Angel is right. Shooting me would only make them angry.“ The Hellhounds started to growl and shifted from one side to the other. Sam, Ellen and Jo glanced around for the source of the noise, but Castiel saw a spark of recognition in Deans eyes. While he pretended, to not be afraid, he could see his soul flicker. The Angel wanted to reassure Dean. Put a wing around him, but he couldn’t be in such a vulnerable position. Not if Hellhounds were ready to attack them any minute. Hellhounds were like Reapers. They were able to collect. Mostly they collected the souls of the damned but technically, they could also collect the essence of an Angel. Being able to touch that, they could also hurt Angels. And these particular beasts were huge.

„Hellhounds“, Dean said to inform the others. 

„Yeah, Dean. Your favorite. Come on, boys. My father wants to see you.“

„I think we’ll pass, thanks“ Sam said.

„Your call. You can make this easy of you can make it really, really hard.“ Meg said. Castiel saw Dean exchange a look with Ellen. She nodded. 

„When have you known us to ever make anything easy?“ Meg shook her head and Dean shifted his aim, to kill the Hellhound next to her. 

„Run!“ Sam shouted. And they ran. But they weren’t the only ones. The Hellhounds jumped forward, the thrill of he hunt in their eyes, tongues rolling out of their mouths. Their claws were scraping the ground, as they sprinted forward. Castiel saw a Hellhound jump, aiming to tackle Dean. It was the biggest of them, and it was quick. An ice-cold wave of seemed to hit Castiel. For a second, the time seemed to still. Everything else blurred out of his focus. Dean couldn’t die. He flapped his wings, and on an instant, he was pushing Dean out of the way, the Hellhound instead shoving him to the ground, where Dean had been an instant before. 

„Cas!“ Dean shouted. Sam and Jo also turning around. And the Angel stabbed the beast, but not before it had ripped his side open, almost biting a chunk out of him. He cried out with pain, as it teared through his very essence. His injured grace leaked through the wound, mixing with the blood. Castiel opened its jaw and shoved the heavy body off of him and stood up, biting back his pain, pretending to be alright. He was greeted with the sight of Dean’s terrified face. 

„Go Dean!“, he shouted the next Hellhounds already on their trail. Castiel pushed the pain down and sprinted towards Dean, his Grace leaving him much faster now. But Dean needed to get away from here and if he couldn’t do it, while he thought, that Cas wasn’t okay, then he needed to pretend that he was alright. „GO!“, he shouted again, gripping Dean at his shoulder. That seemed to rip Dean out of his stupor and the Hunter turned to run.  
But Jo had also hesitated to keep going. A Hellhound approached her in rapid pace. He was to close, already leaping forward. Cas bit back a groan and extended his wing to keep the Hound from reaching Jo. The beast growled as it clawed and pushed his teeth into his wings. Castiel choked and suppressed all his instincts of pulling his wing back. Because that would expose Jo to the beasts.  
With the help of his other flying appendage, he stood now behind her and gripped the beast by its neck, ripping it off his wing and smashing it on the floor, stabbing it right there. The flight had used up almost all the grace he had left and he stumbled to the ground. Another Hellhound was coming to attack Jo from the side. „Look out“, the Angel shouted, grace still leaking from the wound under his ribs, unable to help. Sam and Ellen turned around, just to watch as Jo jumped out of the way, the Hellhound only managing to claw her thigh, instead of ripping open her stomach. Jo fired at the Hellhound, while Ellen and Sam ran towards them. Dean approached Cas, pulling him forward, while Ellen picked up Jo. 

„Come on you have to keep going“ Dean said, while Sam protected their back. Dean headed for one of the nearest stores, opening the door with one hand and with the other supporting Castiel, who leaned against the frame in exhaustion. He was running low on grace. The way his essence left him, he wouldn’t be able to heal that wound quickly enough. Cas could see his grace leaking out of his vessel. He knew, that he was about to die.

 

Quickly Dean opened the door and pulled the Angel inside. He could hear Sam shooting and the growling of these hellish Fuckers. Gently he lowered Cas on the floor and pushed that stupid Trench-coat out of the way, to get a clear look at the wound. He didn’t notice Sam barricading the door, or Ellen asking if everything was alright. The only thing he could think of was: ‘No, no, no, this isn’t happening!’ A deep gash, about the length of two hands ranged from Cas ribs, over his stomach, ending right next to his hipbone. It was deep and blood was seeping out from under the ripped shirt. But that wasn’t what concerned him the most. A bright light shone through, little swirls of it dissolving right after it left Cas’ body. „You are an Angel, it’ll heal right?! You can heal that!“ Dean said panicking. Sam stood right behind him, white as a wall, speechless at the sight of Cas slowly dying.

„I fear, that I can not“ Castiel said, his blue eyes piercing right into his. 

„But there must be somebody, anybody!“ Dean said as he pushed against the wound with his hand, trying to keep the white light in, knowing it was useless.  
Sam laid a hand on his shoulder. He didn’t know, if it was to reassure him, or if his brother needed some kind of support.

„Azrael, Gabriel... They could maybe do something.“ Cas said, weakly.

Dean turned around, looking at Sam. „Get me some bandages! And then try to get these stupid, useless Archangels here, I don’t care what you have to do.“ Sam nodded and immediately searched the store. Ellen was helping Jo who was also bleeding, but not nearly to the extend Cas did. Dean ripped off a part of Cas’ Trench-coat and tried to stop the bleeding. 

„It’s okay Dean.“ Cas said and lifted a bloody hand up, to cup his face. He hadn’t realized, that he was crying, till Cas wiped away a tear. „This is a cause worth dying for, and I don’t regret a minute i spent with you, Sam, Bobby, Ellen or Jo. You taught me how to think for myself, to feel and to love. I’ve lived a good life“

„And how long have you left? If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t die right now“, Dean choked out.

„Probably about ten minutes? Depends on how fast the rest of my Grace leaves my body.“ And the stupid guy even had guts to smile, to reassure him! Then his expression shifted into a very serious one. „But don’t ever underestimate your worth. It’s worth dying for you. From the moment, I pulled you out of Hell, I knew that you were worth it.“ Cas slid his hand to the place, where Dean knew there was an imprint of this exact shape, since the day Cas had saved him. „And not because you are Michael’s vessel, or John Winchesters son. No, because you are you.“ Cas continued and he looked into Deans eyes with so much love and determination, that Dean couldn’t help but cup his face and kiss him. As he pulled away, Cas seemed puzzled, but then his Angel started to smile. „As I said. I lived a wonderful life“ Despite the tears Dean had to laugh and he rested his forehead against Cas’, hoping for a miracle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well I'm sorry for this ending, but the next chapter will be posted in two days so you don't have to wait for too long. Well, you guys out there who are still reading my fanfic. Kudos to you. 
> 
> Please comment, even if you don't like it. I appreciate all kinds of feedback. What you think needs improvement and so on. And of course, if you liked it.


	11. Choices II (Abandon all Hope)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The story continues...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's the next chapter, hope you like it.

Chapter 11:  
(Abandon all Hope (still))

After the Reapers had showed him the way, Azrael had entered the building to talk to his brother. He could sense the faint trace of Lucifer’s grace, but it looked like he had just vanished. As he walked through the halls, he was greeted with the sight of a Demon, who held a woman hostage. A knife on her throat the other arm fixated by the Creature. He was ready to smite the Demon, but the being pressed the bleeding hand of the woman against something bloody on the wall. Azrael didn’t even have the time to react, when he was ripped out of this plane and blasted away. It wasn’t a pleasant feeling. Like a banishing spell, it returned him, to where he came from. His original home, that he had avoided visiting for so long. Heaven.

He landed on a part, what felt like he wasn’t close to the Garden, but not quite on the edge either. He took a second to gather himself. Azrael tried to return, but he had to admit, that he wasn’t able to fly away immediately. His wings trembled with anger and cold fury burned in his core, swirling around and trying to break free. He rearranged the molecules of his vessel, which was rather roughed up an then took a look around. He sensed millions upon millions of souls. If he remembered correctly, his father already had plans to create humanity back then. Now, he just wanted to avoid Michael, he couldn’t deal with him right now. He needed to get back down. Until he was able to leave, he would have to conceal his presence. He bit back his anger and restrained himself. Luckily, he could hide most of his power in the core of his vessel. It would prevent him, from being recognized as an Archangel. Not for long, but it would have to do. Suddenly, he felt three Angels approach him.  
Lead by a Seraph, the small garrison stopped right in front of Azrael.

„Ah, you must be the other Angel, who consorts with the Winchesters. I have been waiting for your arrival. I knew, that you would show up, one day. Let’s have a little talk. Maybe after that, you change your mind and help us dealing with these stubborn vessels.“, their leader said. Azrael felt his anger rising. This angel would not hesitate torturing him, if it was the only way, to get what he wanted.

„And who do you think, that you are, to demand that?“ Azrael spat out.

„My name“, he took a step forward, „is Zachariah. You will learn to treat this name and everything you associate with it, with respect.“, the Angel said, his wings raised threateningly, the other two looking slightly uncomfortable at the display of power. Azrael had enough. Fuck being discreet. This Angel annoyed him right to the core. The spell, that had prevented him from leaving Heaven, no longer in effect, he flew forward and gripped the annoying Angel by his throat and pinned him with his wings.

„Now you learn, to treat me with respect. Listen closely, because I wont repeat myself“ Azrael unleashed his power upon Zachariah, letting him choke on the display of his might. „Tell Michael, that I don’t approve, of what he is doing right now. If he asks, who told you that, you can tell him, that his older brother said hello“ He gave the Seraph a last push and then took off, leaving the terrified foot-soldiers and their leader be.

Back in the building, there was no trace of the woman or the Demon. The only thing left, was a bloody sigil on the wall. Azrael stared at it, letting the wall crack right through the circle. He needed to find Lucifer. As he walked out on the street, he could hear a distant growling. And a prayer tugged on the back of his mind. He arrived to see three dead creatures on the ground. Black blood building big puddles underneath their body’s. Azrael followed the noises and with a beat of his wings, he stood inside of a hardware store, the source of the prayer. Sam jumped, as he appeared right next to him. „Thank God you are here!“, he said.

Ellen was just helping Jo, who sat on the counter looking at a wound on her thigh, she was hurt but it didn’t look lethal. Castiel on the other hand... Azrael was shocked. He could see the life force leaving the Angel. If he wouldn’t get help soon, he would probably die. Dean crouched in front of him a hand on his neck and with the other one pressing a bloody piece of cloth against Castiel’s side. Their foreheads touching, Dean’s soul flickered in distress. Castiel’s whole side was ripped open and the lower part of his right wing was covered in claw and bite-marks. Azrael could see his grace leaking out of the wound. „Can you help him?“ Sam asked.

„I don’t know. I’ve never healed another Angel...“ Azrael said honestly and walked over to the other Winchester and Castiel. „Raphael would be better at this...You can help Ellen with Jo. Stop the bleeding.“ he said, directed at Sam. „Hello Castiel“ Dean got up and Cas only looked at him. „I’ll need some space.“ Dean took a step backwards. „It’s okay Cas. You are going to be okay“, the Winchester said reassuringly. Azrael knelt down in front of Castiel. „You know, that this is going to be painful“

„Yes“ Castiel said smiling.  
Azrael felt himself surprised once more by the little soldier. He was really a remarkable Angel. The Archangel put his hands upon Castiel’s chest. He let his grace seep through Castiel’s being, sensing every part of him. At first, Azrael focused on the vessel, he knitted the flesh together and reproduced the missing blood. Castiel gasped as the muscles connected once again, but that wasn’t the difficiult part. Azrael knew, that his eyes would be glowing by now and he pushed a part of his own grace in Castiel. And the Angel screamed. His true voice sounded through the store, letting the windows shake. Next to him, Dean covered his ears, a trickle of blood running out. Azrael stopped, his hands not glowing anymore, and Castiel was unconscious. Exhausted, he sank down next to Castiel on the floor.

„What the Hell did you do!“ Dean asked him.

„I pushed my own grace to merge with his remaining one. He should be able to heal himself now and with time, his grace should take over again, cleaning mine from his system.“

„Then why is he unconscious?!“ Dean said still kinda angry, as he looked after Cas’ wound.

„I am an Archangel! What do you think?! I practically shoved pure power into him. A nuclear bomb would be nothing against this. He has to adapt first.“ Azrael sighed and stood up. „Where is Gabriel?“ he asked, as he walked over to heal Jo.

„We don’t know. He hasn’t answered our prayers since you have been blasted away.“ Ellen said. Azrael ran his hand through his hair.

„This isn’t good.“, Azrael said as he was pacing back an forth. Castiel groaned and Dean quickly helped him to stand up.

„Nothing is good. Not one of our plans actually worked!“ Sam said. „Gabriel disappeared. There are still Hellhounds we need to Deal with and Lucifer still wants to raise Death!“ Outside of the Door, the beings had begun to snarl and growl again.

„These creatures have done that?“

„Hellhounds, yes.“ Cas said.

„They feel more like Reapers...“

„Wait, what Reapers?“ Dean asked.

„It makes sense.“, Sam replied. „They collect the souls of the ones who die, after they made a deal.“

A strange thought came into his mind. ‘What if they were exactly like Reapers?’ He needed to try something out. Azrael flapped with his wings and was outside. Seven Hounds stood in front of the door, trying to get in. Snapping at each other to get closer to the door, but none of them dared to approach a certain hound. The ones who tried were turned down viciously. They were black and bony with short fur, massive paws and a big chest. They were like shadows and smoke, the muscles under their skin moving with every step. Pointed ears focused on their prey and their spine was visible on their back. A short mane, that reminded him of hyenas, grew from their necks to their shoulders, a trail of smoke following every time they moved their tails.

As soon as they sensed him, they turned around, empty eyes directed on him. They growled, but they hesitated to attack him. Azrael stared in the eyes of the one, who he thought was the Alpha of the pack. He was about twice as big as a wolf. A bigger beast had been laying dead on the street, stabbed by an Angel-blade. After a while, it whimpered and lowered his head, presenting it’s throat in submission. Azrael smirked at the creature and petted its massive head and then he took a step back. Then he motioned for them them to stay and flew back inside.

„What did you do?“, Jo asked him.

„I took care of the Hellhounds“

„You took care of the Hellhounds. Just like this.“ Ellen said and she raised an eyebrow.

„Yeah.“ Azrael said and he shook his wings, in what was the equivalent of a shrug.

„We need to go.“, Castiel said, Dean supporting him as he stood. „It’s almost midnight.“

„But we need Gabriel, he knows how the ritual works.“, Sam answered.

„Then why are we still here? Let’s go find him“, Jo said loading her shotgun and jumping off the counter. They broke the salt-line in front of the door and removed the chain from around the handles. Castiel wouldn’t be able to fly, but at least he could now walk on his own again. Sam opened the door and stepped through, followed by Ellen and Jo. They looked around, but they couldn’t see anything. Dean and Cas followed and stopped right outside.

„Cas, you sure, that you are alright?“ Dean asked the Angel, and Azrael noticed Cas squeezing Deans hand reassuringly.

„Yes, I’m going to be alright. My grace is already healing. Slowly, but I’ll... recover“ The last word was said without paying attention, because Castiel had spotted, what the others couldn’t see.

„Cas?“, Dean asked. The Angel was looking at the Hellhounds, that were still there and watching them attentively. His knuckles were white, as he gripped Deans hand and he took a step forward to shield the older Winchester.

„You said, you took care of them.“ Now Ellen and Jo looked at Azrael, a shocked look on their face.

Sam was the first to say it out loud. „The Hellhounds. They are still there?“ Dean gasped and immediately followed Castiel’s line of gaze, even if he couldn’t see them. Ellen and Jo also aimed their guns at the - to them - invisible Hounds. The creatures started to growl, as they saw the weapons and the Alpha and another one even took a step forward. Azrael was there immediately, now standing beside the Hellhound and gripping his neck tightly. The beast whimpered, but Azrael didn’t let go, until it went slack under his hold. It licked his hand apologetic and Azrael stared at the Alpha who took a step back and returned to the pack.

„You really took care of them.“, the Angel said.

„You have them under control?“ Sam asked him, after what he had heard and seen Azrael doing.

„Well, they are just like Reapers...“ Azrael said, „Maybe a bit different“

„Of course“, Dean laughed almost hysterically. „He can control the fucking Hellhounds...“

Ellen looked sceptical, but Jo seemed to take the news in differently. „Can you, you know, make them do stuff?“, she asked.

„Probably“, Azrael said and grinned. He was pretty sure, that he knew what Jo was thinking.

„Can you let them search for Gabriel?“, she asked and the others also seemed to grasp what she had been thinking all along.

„Only one way to find out...“ Azrael smirked and turned towards the hounds. „You heard her, didn’t you?“ And the Hellhounds started to pace. Shifting their weight from one side to the other, even growling at the Alpha, who snapped at them, keeping them in line. They waited for their last order. „Find the other Angel. Go“ And they sprinted forward, doing what they were meant to do. And Azrael followed.

„I still don’t trust this“, Ellen said.

„Me neither“, answered Sam, but nevertheless, the group followed Azrael.

The pack only stopped twice, sniffing the air and the ground, and then they started running again. Happily they ran around, wagging their tails, leaving a trail of smoke behind.  
They were led to a building next to the police station and the Hellhounds didn’t hesitate. The beasts jumped through the windows and teared down the door. Azrael was impressed. The pack didn’t stop, until they reached a room. Azrael followed them inside, the hounds barking and growling.  
On first sight, only the empty meatsuit of a demon was inside. Meg. But Azrael found something was off, in the middle of the room. The reality was slightly bent. He snapped his fingers and suddenly Gabriel was revealed, standing inside a circle of holy fire. Azrael petted the Hound next to him.  
„Well done.“, he said to the beasts, grinning at Gabriel’s shaken expression.

„You befriended fucking Hellhounds?!“, his brother said, after he regained his voice. Azrael laughed and let the holy fire dye out. „This nice little lady over there smoked out, two seconds after you entered the building. I thought they would try to tear me apart! It would have been bitch, to find all my pieces again“, Gabriel said. Panting, Ellen, Jo and Sam arrived, shortly after followed by Dean and Cas.

„Could you not...let them run...next time?“ Jo said, as she gripped the doorframe. Still eyeing the Hellhounds wearily. Well, where she thought the Hellhounds stood.

„They have done their part. Now please, can you send them away?“, Ellen said.

„I suppose, I can.“ Azrael answered and he petted the Alpha and then sent them away with a wave of his hand. The Hellhounds left the room and disappeared in the shadows outside.

„We only have about fifteen minutes left“, Sam said.

„I don’t think, you have the time to talk to the Devil Az.“, Dean said. At Gabriel’s curious look Azrael explained.

„I was blasted away by a sigil, before I could see him“

„You were in Heaven?“, Gabriel asked.

„Yeah“

„Did you meet Michael?“

„No, only some douche called Zachariah.“ Azrael answered. „He demanded ‘some respect’.“, Azrael said, using Zachariah’s voice.

„What did you do?“ Sam asked him.

„Well I showed him, who he has to pay some respect to and told him, to tell Michael, I said hi.“ Dean doubled over in laughter and Sam also grinned. Gabriel leaned over to Azrael.

„I think you broke them“, he whispered. The amusement didn’t last long, because Ellen reminded them, that they needed to go. „Cassie, what happened you? You look quite roughed up!“

„Hellhounds.“ Castiel said dryly.

„Hellhounds. Not the same Hellhounds, my dear brother brought here?!“ Azrael shrugged. „You“, Gabriel pointed at his chest, „are crazy. And if I say this, it has to be true.“ He took a closer look at Azrael. „How much juice did you use, to heal him. You barely feel like a seraph.“

„Raphael could have done it better. I used what I had to. I’ll recover. Give me two hours and I’ll be fully powered again.“

„So what are we doing? Cassie, you able to fly?“, Gabriel asked.

„I don’t think so.“

„Well, then you take him and I the others?“, the Trickster said. Azrael nodded. „See ya.“ Gabriel saluted and then vanished, together with the humans, who weren’t even able to protest.

Azrael was just about to touch Cas’ vessel to steady his flight, when he was shoved aside. An angel. Azrael had to choose, he stood in the circle of holy oil. Another party had decided to interfere. Cas wouldn’t be able to fight and Azrael wasn’t in his best shape either. He looked at Castiel and the Angel wanted to protest, as he saw the decision in Azrael’s eyes. But Azrael didn’t let him argue. He focused and snapped his fingers, sending Castiel to the others. The little Angel was probably not in his best shape now, but that was better than remaining here. This second was all the time the attacking Angel needed and it set fire to the remaining holy oil. The circle, that had held Gabriel before and now Azrael. „And who are you?“, Azrael asked.

„Call me Anna“, the Angel said, wearing a female vessel. Her red hair, the most showy attribute.

 

Anna had though about things for a long time, after her encounter with Crowley. Her only chance to kill Lucifer had been the Colt. But now she didn’t know what to do. She couldn’t kill Sam, as long as she didn’t know, who the other Angel was, that was an ally to the Winchesters. She had led a garrison once. She wouldn’t storm in without a plan, not knowing the circumstances and her chances for a win. She decided to watch Crowley closely. This Demon had lied to her. The colt had to be somewhere! She even tried to get through the warding again, but it had been improved. She had no chance in getting through.  
To her surprise, the Winchesters showed up and were able to steal the Colt. But there was a thing, that confused her. She had watched from a far away distance, but it seemed like an Angel destroyed the warding around the mansion, a few hours before the Winchesters arrived. Castiel had stopped in front of the house, just like her. He didn’t get through. Obviously, he searched for the colt too. The angel, that had seemed to follow Castiel on the other hand... He had masked his presence, like so many before him, but destroying the warding to get in? That couldn’t be! No ordinary Angel could do something like that. This Angel had to know to the Demon. There was no other way, he could get in. She needed to know more. As she listened to the Angels and interrogated some Demons, she found out, that this Angel was the supposedly friend of the Winchesters! But clearly he was lying. He wouldn’t betray Castiel like that, if he was an ally to them. He was probably a spy for Lucifer. Many Angels had fallen with the Archangel back then. She never had encountered one, who still seemed like an angel. Maybe it was just someone, who had changed sides...  
Anna couldn’t let him cross her plans in getting what she wanted. She couldn’t steal the colt from Dean and Sam, but she could help them achieve, what she had wanted to do in the first place. Killing the Devil. But this other Angel was a liability and he needed to be out of the way. Only because he fooled the Winchesters, that didn’t mean, that she would be this naive. She knew, that Lucifer would be in Carthage. As she heard, that Dean and Sam would be there too, she didn’t hesitate.

„Why are you doing this?“ Azrael asked, as he watched her closely. Her grace was dim. She was falling.

„You will not interfere. They maybe trust you, but I don’t. The Winchesters have to kill Lucifer. Michael won’t admit it, but there are rumors about an angel, that sides with Lucifer. I only put one and one together. Keeping you from destroying their plan is all I can and will do.“

„I think you got something wrong here. I don’t want Lucifer to destroy humanity.“, Azrael said.

„That is what, everyone would say to get free.“, Anna replied. „I won’t release you because of this poor excuse“ Azrael felt a cold heat coiling in his gut. Angels started to get the habit to annoy him. He suppressed the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose.

„Look, the Winchesters aren’t able to kill Lucifer. The colt won’t work. The least it will do is injure Lucifer’s grace. And that will only piss him off. And then, he will use that certain grace to hurt them really, really bad. And that is something, we want to prevent.“, he explained as if he was talking to a child.

„I don’t believe you...“, Anna said, but she looked uncertain.

Azrael sighed. „I’ve had, what you call a ‘bad day’! So if you would please release me. I would be really thankful. My patience is almost nonexistent at the moment.“ Azrael’s eyes started glowing. While the wings of the other angel twitched nervously, she didn’t do anything to release him. „Know what? I don’t care. I tried to be nice, but if that doesn’t work for you...“ Azrael had enough. All he had wanted was to talk to Lucifer. Today he had been blasted away by a demon, had encountered Zachariah, Cas had almost died and now he had been captured by another Angel and was to weak to deal with her himself. If Michael would have been in his place instead, he would’ve probably snapped at the very beginning, and already smitten Zachariah for his attitude... Azrael didn’t know, if it would work, but he whistled through his teeth.  
And really, they were there, his new companions. Like fog from the floor they appeared. The black clouds forming Hellhounds. As if they knew his mood, the beasts immediately started growling and gnashing their teeth, swishing their tails back and forth, leaving a trail of smoke behind, as they circled their new prey. „Come on boys!“ Azrael smirked as he challenged the Hounds and they jumped. Anna’s grace contracted with fear and she disappeared, only the Alpha managed to scratch her wing, before she flew away.

The satisfaction was only short-lived. He was still inside the circle, and the Hellhounds didn’t dare to touch the holy fire. That was the moment, he felt a strange tugging in his core, almost like the banishing spell, but different. It was a powerful summoning, and he couldn’t refuse. He resisted as long, as he was able to, but he had to follow. Otherworldly pain filled him and Azrael screamed, as he was pulled through the wall of holy fire, the glass in the room shattering into pieces.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapters on "Abandon all Hope", are getting more and more. But there are just so much things, that I wanted to add...
> 
> Also, I wasn't really satisfied by the end of this chapter, at least the way I wrote it, so I made a cut. I will rewrite that part and it will be in the next chapter. Lucifer and Azrael still didn't get to talk. I'm sorry. I really wanted to include this here.
> 
> Well, I want to keep some kind of quality here...If that is possible. So I am just an ass and keep teasing Azrael's and Lucifers great reunion and it somehow hasn't happened yet. I know I keep saying that, but it will happen. Eventually. (Hopefully next chapter.)
> 
> ps. Do you think I overpowered Azrael a little bit? I just thought, that it would be cool, to treat Hellhounds like Reapers. And Azrael can control Reapers to a certain extent, because he is the Angel of Death and all that, so it sounded logical to me.
> 
> Also Azrael hasn't really healed an Angel before, so he used too much of his grace, to quickly so he can't just snap and Anna is a bloody stain on the floor. At least that's my explanation. (I need her for the plot)


	12. Man in the Box (Abandon all Hope)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azrael and Lucifer finally meet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, guys who are reading this fic. This chapter is a bit shorter, but finally Azrael and Lucifer meet!

Chapter 12:  
Man in the box

Lucifer worked on the mass grave. It was a necessary part of the ritual. While he wasn't really fond of all the demons surrounding him, there was no way around that. Now here he stood, a shovel in his hand, doing the dirty work, because fixing it with his grace would only mess up the ritual. Summoning Death wasn’t the problem. The ritual looked very similar to a summoning ritual for an Archangel. But he needed Death to appear. To bind him, sacrifices were necessary.   
Nobody had summoned the big guy since the flood. And nobody ever had summoned him, beside his father, or somebody who'd had God's help. Nevertheless, Lucifer didn't doubt, that he would come. Death loved... well death. He would feel a pull, like a moth was pulled towards the light. While the Horseman would do anything to maintain the order of the universe, it was a fact, that everytime the balance was disturbed, people died. Doubtlessly there were other ways to fix such problems, apart from taking people before their time was up.

Lucifer smiled as he heard some shuffeling behind him. He had sensed the Winchesters approach, long before Sam started talking. „Hey!“  
Lucifer turned around to face the speaker, and he let his shovel fall to the ground. „You wanted to see me?“

He was right. Lucifer watched Sam closely. This human was his one true vessel, they were made for each other. Twins in their very core. The one an Angel and the other one a Human. Sam’s soul shone bright. He would’ve had the potential for being a righteous man too, if it weren’t for the dark cracks, caused by the demon blood. Like Lucifer, he was tainted. It was probably the only human, he didn’t want to kill. Yet. „Oh, Sam, you don’t need that gun here. You know I’d never hurt you. Not really.“, he said, acknowledging the shotgun Sam was carrying. It was more of a joke, to be honest. This gun wouldn’t hurt him at all.

„Yeah? Well, I’d hurt you.“ Sam’s brother pointed another gun at his head. It was the colt... He hadn’t had the chance to get hit by that thing, but he knew, it wouldn’t kill him. And the strange thing was, that Dean seemed to know that too.

„You know that this won’t kill me, right?“, Lucifer said, maybe a bit confused by the pointless action, as he turned to finish the ritual. Dean hesitated to shoot. Lucifer knew the gun was still pointed at his head, but the older Winchester didn’t pull the trigger. Lucifer heard him argue with Sam in the background, but he couldn’t focus on that right now. He didn’t have much time left and the ritual demanded all of his attention.

„No, wait“ Sam said.

„I know, it’s just...it’s his fault that Cas got almost killed!“

Lucifer tuned out the whispers and chanted the words, that would activate the summoning. Then he started talking to the Demons. „Now repeat after me. We offer up our lives, blood souls-“

And the Demons in the remaining townspeople started talking simultaneously. „We offer up our lives, blood, souls-“

„To complete this tribute.“, Lucifer continued.

„To complete this tribute.“, the Demons repeated. But other than the Archangel, the Demons flashed gold, one after one and fell over, dead. Lucifer turned around to look at Sam and his brother.

„What? They’re just demons.“, he said, as he saw the shocked faces. But Lucifer sensed something was wrong, as the two humans stared at the summoning circle, a bright light illuminating their faces. This was a light, that foretold something, not comprehensible by a human mind. He instinctively raised his wings to shield his true vessel and begrudgingly also Sam’s brother.

Lucifer saw something, he hadn’t anticipated. He looked upon the pure essence of Death. But it was not one, but two beings, that were mingled there, already separating again. A human body unconsciously remaining inside the circle. An empty vessel. As the two entities parted, the Archangel was faced with the infamous Horseman, who had manifested itself, choosing the form of an old man. But next to the being, the no longer empty vessel opened his eyes. An otherworldly, but all so familiar light illuminated its body from within until it had adapted. Not even two seconds had passed from the summoning until this moment.

Lucifer had sensed the familiar form of an angel claim the body. He wasn’t able to do anything but take a step forward, almost falling to his knees, as he felt the other Angel. Completely forgetting all of his surroundings, his wings reached out. While he couldn’t break through the binding circle right now, as couldn’t the beings inside, he was still greeted with a warm smile and the bright pulse of a grace. Offering comfort and stuffing a hole, he hadn’t known existed in his core. „Brother...“, the Angel inside the circle said.

Lucifer couldn’t care less about the shaking that accompanied his next word, almost sounding like a mix of a sob and a whisper. „Azrael...“

Lucifer didn’t hear the flutter of wings, announcing the arrival of another angel, or the tumult that followed until it was to late. He turned around to being hit by a bullet of the Colt. He fairly noticed, that he was being caught, before he hit the ground, but then his vision faded into nothingness.

 

Azrael was a mess, as a conscious thought first surfaced again. An ordinary Angel would have been burned alive. As an Archangel, being pulled through a wall of holy fire didn’t only hurt like bitch, but also messed up his essence in a way, he didn’t want to experience again. He had been ripped out of his vessel. Not for long, but this moment was enough to confuse his messed up mind only more. He wasn’t alone. His grace had almost merged with the other being, till he was able to resurface. Who was this being. It felt like a reaper, but there was more to it. It couldn’t be.

 _„The world needs Death, even if it is inactive. The fourth Horseman. He carries a small part of it. He doesn’t know that it belongs to you, though...“_ This thought came to his mind. But was it really a thought? Who had said that to him and why couldn’t he remember...?

This being, the Horseman known as Death carried a part of his grace in its very core. So deeply embedded in the beings mind, that it was practically a part of the it.

Azrael called out to this part. And the short time, the grace needed to leave his host and return to its origin, couldn’t have lasted longer than the blink of an eye. But for Azrael it lasted a lifetime.

Because with his power came knowledge.

The Horseman was old. Older than a lot of the Angels. Ancient. But it was nothing compared to Azrael. The age gap between Azrael and Michael contained by human standards a few billion years. And the Horseman was made about the same time as Gabriel. Back then, nobody had really cared about God’s little side projects. The first Reaper... Not really of importance, when there were no souls to reap. Watching Lucifer as he showed Gabriel how to fly, was way more interesting.

As he had gained the part of Azrael’s grace, a part of Azrael himself, the part that made out Death, the Horseman had also gained his memories till a certain moment. Not all of them. But enough, to think that he was older than everyone else, not even sure if he was there first or God himself.

Azrael ripped himself from the being, taking his grace with him, having absorbed everything the Horseman knew. Not only knowledge, but also a part of the essence of this being had merged with him. Only the smallest extension of his being had remained inside his old human body. Luckily it was enough of an anchor, to quickly find a way back inside. His still extremely compressed form hadn’t done to much damage. Partly caused by the binding circle. It prevented him from expanding to his real dimension. He wouldn’t be able to leave the binding circle, for it was powered by souls. It would hold him for as long, as the summoner had intended. His true form slipped back into his human vessel, lightening it up from within.  
He streched the three pairs of his wings, that remained as he took possession of the body again. He could feel the Winchesters and he knew, Gabriel wouldn’t be far away, hiding Ellen, Jo and probably his and Castiel’s presence too. The younger angel would likely not even be able to walk, the way Azrael had sent him here. And Gabriel would not appear. It was his mission to make sure, that Lucifer wouldn’t bind the fourth horseman. Preventing that, was his priority. And he needed to do a counter ritual, „Obviously not right in front of Lucifer’s nose!“, as the Trickster had said. Counting on the fact, that the Winchesters, as vessels were to much of a value to be killed, they were sent forward. Recalling all of these facts, the Archangel opened his eyes and stood up.

Next to Azrael, inside of the binding circle stood the Horseman, now having materialized in a somewhat human-looking body, at least on the surface. No longer bearing the essence of _the Death_ , he wasn’t bound anymore. The being watched him attentively. He could feel the confusion and curiosity of the Horseman. But that wasn’t what caught Azrael’s eye- The Reaper was dismissed with a thought an disappeared, unspoken promise to talk later. All of Azrael’s attention was directed elsewhere.

The one, he had looked for so long stood in front of him. A bit roughed up maybe. The core not as bright as it once had been, and the feathers duller, than he remembered. His wings of a colour, no human could describe, still brighter than those of every Angel, who had ever existed. The bringer of Light. Lucifer.

Azrael’s grace lightened up. It pulsed with a warm feeling, reaching out like his wings. Expanding, wanting to touch and heal, but not able because of the summoning circle. „Brother...“, he said. Not able to get out another word at the sight of Lucifer.

The morning star curled his wings with the intent to reach, the tips grazing the outside of the circle. „Azrael...“

That was, when the Angel of Death noticed someone, he hadn’t expected to ever come back. The slightly off sounding flutter of wings announced the arrival of  
an Angel.

Anna.

She appeared right behind the Winchesters. Her left wing was hanging down a bit, she stumbled once but caught herself. With inhuman strength, she grabbed Deans wrist, which held the Colt. She didn’t even blink, as she was punched by the older Winchester. „Sorry“, she said, as she knocked Sam out of the way, who had tried to stab her with an Angel blade. She gripped the Colt tightly,with one fluid motion, ignoring the angry shout of Dean. Anna quickly ripped the Weapon out of his hand and Azrael could hear the crunch that followed, as she did so. Several of Dean’s fingers were broken.  
Without hesitation she aimed and shot Lucifer in the head.

Azrael’s mind was blank for a moment. He didn’t even notice Dean running over to Sam, to help his unconscious brother.  
‘The colt can’t kill him. He’s alive’, that was all he could think. And the bright pulsing grace of Lucifer was the proof of that. But still. He sucked in breath. The cold feeling in his gut, that held him in his icy grip not vanishing, wings shaking, curled tightly around his body.

But Anna wasn’t finished yet. With a beat of her wings, the Angel had appeared just in the right moment to catch Lucifer’s falling form. She looked at Azrael. „You were right, it didn’t kill him, but he can’t destroy humanity if he doesn’t have the power.“ And with that, she pulled out her Angel-blade and cut Lucifer’s throat. Bright light showed the place, where Lucifer’s grace shone through the wound.

The moment, Anna opened her mouth and the first swirls of grace entered her, Azrael’s emotion changed and he was ripped out of his stupor. White light shone through his eyes, his grace viciously twisting right under his skin. With every piece of grace leaving Lucifer, the binding circle lost some strength. The temperature dropped. This wasn’t the same cold of fear, that had filled him a second ago. This wasn’t the icy fire that Lucifer carried within his core. This was the chill that accompanied a corpse. The cold fingers of death reaching out. The sky darkened, none of the stars visible anymore. No noise could be heard, beside the cracking of the suddenly dry earth beneath and the rotting grass above. As the first Reapers started to gather around Azrael and looked at Anna with a dead look in the eyes, her wings started to tremble with fear.

His true voice rang through the air, as he took a step forward and bared his teeth. _**‘How dare you! How dare you to take what is not yours to take. Stealing the essence of a most holy warrior.’**_ And he took another step forward, his wings raised high, not caring about the binding circle anymore, or Gabriel who had appeared, watching the scene with a shocked face.

Azrael didn’t feel the pain, as he tore through the remaining binding, and appeared right in front of Anna. He pulled her from Lucifer’s body and gripped her by the throat. Her eyes widened as she saw herself faced with the fury of an Archangel. Wildly trashing with her wings, she stopped suddenly, as she felt what Azrael was doing. The Angel called upon her grace, her life force. Slowly it withered away. She clawed at his hand, as he started to squeeze and her breath came in rattling gasps. Azrael pusher her against the ground, and with a last exhale, she expired, the remains of her wings burning away the dead grass, only leaving the characteristic shape of an Angel, dying.

Azrael grinned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hit me. I know we all waited for a real conversation between this brothers, but I knew this was going to happen. Lucifer is not dead at least. So there will be talking. I haven't really planned things out, so I'll have to figure out what will happen next. Or how stuff will happen. Of course there are some things I still want to include. Like, Azrael will definitely have to talk to his father at one point. And there are still Michael and Raphael.
> 
> At the moment it is open, if there is going to be a Lucifer/Azrael pairing so please comment what you think. I'll try to write the next chapter in a way, that it can still go in both directions. 
> 
>  
> 
> ps.  
> I don't hate Anna. Well, we all probably did at a certain point, (when she tried to kill Sam) but her reasons are mostly good and understandable. But I didn't think, that Azrael would be of the forgiving type, if somebody harmed his brothers. And this chapter was mostly from his point of view... 
> 
> Also I am very fond of the Supernatural Death and I didn't want to rule him out. He is still more powerful than ordinary Reapers, and he will probably appear again. If only for a short talk.


	13. Losing Grace (Post-Abandon all Hope)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer regains his consciousness and Azrael is very protective.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello. I'm sorry for the delay, but it's harder to write Lucifer than I thought. I already know what I want to happen, but getting it written down is really difficult. Originally I wanted to write this chapter longer, but I need to post something, so here it is. 
> 
> I know this is short and nothing is really happening, but this is the first impression of 'this' Lucifer that we get and he is going to change with time. But right now, humans are still on his kill-list and he isn't the nicest person.

Chapter 13

Azrael looked upon the body lying on the ground. Small flakes of ashes and burned feathers swirled through the air, the red hair splayed out like the mockery of a halo. His gaze lingered for a second then he appeared right next to Lucifer’s unconscious form. „Lucifer...“, he whispered, as knelt down next to his brother. The satisfaction of killing Anna slowly vanishing, but being replaced with concern.  
Lucifer had gotten paler and paler, a steady stream of blood was running down from his forehead and throat, already forming a small puddle beneath the body.

Hesitantly, Azrael reached out with his hand and laid it upon Lucifer’s unmoving chest. He sensed Lucifer’s presence. Even some of his grace was still with this body. But it wasn’t much. Enough, too keep him from dying though, but the bullet hole in his forehead stood out prominently. He wouldn’t survive much longer in this state.  
Azrael called upon his grace. A soft glow emitted from his hands and lightened up the faces of the living and also the corpses of the former demons, which remained still and unmoving. He healed the damaged body. With Lucifer in his weakened state, and without the powerful grace burning within, the visible burns on his temples and hands also vanished.

While the bones were now intact and the wounds were closed, Lucifer still didn’t move at all. Azrael looked up, for the first time acknowledging the presence of the others. The Winchesters stood there, watching with wide eyes. Azrael noticed the trail of blood around their ears. Gabriel had probably arrived early enough, to shield them from his voice. At least to majority of it.

Gabriel. He stood there, mouth hanging open and frozen in place. What Anna had done to Lucifer was comparable, to what humans considered cannibalism. But it wasn’t the flesh. It was, as if she had eaten a soul, or the power within. She had tried to consume the grace of another angel. Its very essence given by their father. It was a miracle she even survived this long, housing the grace of an Archangel. Well, after all, she didn’t live long enough to steal everything.

„Is he dead?“, Sam asked, disrupting the silence.

Azrael didn’t answer. He looked back at the motionless face of the body on the ground. ‘This was not supposed to happen’, he thought, as he carefully lifted up the body. Even Lucifer’s wings were folded in, remaining hidden in his body. There wasn’t enough grace left, to manifest them. ‘How could somebody to this?’ Protectively, he wrapped his own wings around his vulnerable brother, to shield him from any harm. At Gabriel’s questioning look he finally answered. „He is alive.“

„What are we gonna do?“, Gabriel asked, uncertain.

„He’s almost human, we should be able to kill him“, Dean said, staring at Azrael and Lucifer. He was white as a wall

Azrael’s eyes immediately darted towards the Winchester. His flying appendages were raised high at this statement, the sharp ends of his shadowy wings displayed aggressively, despite the human not seeing them.  
„You will do nothing to him!“, Azrael said coldly, causing Dean and Sam to take a step back, as the grass surrounding his feet crumbled even more, almost turning into dust.

„Okay, okay.“ Sam raised his hands. But he only calmed down, when Gabriel stepped between the Winchesters and him.

„Stop acting like the Terminator and pull yourself together.“, the Trickster said, looking at Azrael, „And you“, a pointed look at Dean, „you recall what happened to the other person we know ,who harmed Luci?“ Dean swallowed hard, looking at Anna. Azrael begrudgingly took a step back and Dean also shut his mouth, an annoyed look on his face. „What is your plan now, Az?“, Gabriel asked the Archangel, just as he had folded his wings in a more neutral position.

Azrael looked at the unconscious form in his arms. ‘Wasn’t it obvious? Lucifer needed to recover. He needed a safe place.’ „I am going to take care of him.“, he said out loud.

„Like you took care of the Hellhounds?“, Dean replied. Azrael suppressed the urge to roll his eyes, instead he just proceeded to ignore the Winchester.

„What was your plan? Disappearing on us, and taking Lucifer with you?“, Gabriel asked. „I know you haven’t talked yet. But you don’t know how he is gonna be like. Chances are likely that he still wants to take over the world, if he wakes up.“ The Trickster raised an eyebrow.

That would have been exactly his plan, to be honest. „Do you have a better idea? Heaven and Hell will be on his heels now, if they haven’t been beforehand. He can’t continue the Apocalypse in the state he’s in anyways!“, Azrael said.

„We could take him with us, or back to Bobby.“, Sam said. „Then we would know , what he is going to do.“

„The Hell, I am going to let him near you Sam!“, the older Winchester said. „Or Bobby!“, he added.

„What is he going to do? He is still unconscious and we have two Archangels around!“, Sam replied. „It’s better to keep an eye on him.“

Dean didn’t seem to share his brothers opinion. Azrael felt the thoughts spinning in Dean’s mind. „Where is Cas?“, Dean asked Gabriel, now having set an priority.

„I put him asleep, to regain some of his strength.“

„What are we going to do about Lucifer?“, Sam interrupted.

Azrael had just decided to ignore the arguing from this point on. He had enough. Azrael held Lucifer’s body close and disappeared with a flap of his wings. The angel didn’t care, where they would stay, as long as nobody tried to kill his brother. He arrived in the dusty living room/library of Bobby’s house, a slight breeze following him as he folded his wings neatly behind his back. Azrael looked at the other Archangel, as he placed him gently on the couch.

He sensed Gabriel arrive in the backyard and heard the distant cursing of Bobby Singer. The others were there as well.  
Gabriel had probably offered staying in one of his houses. Living on earth as the Trickster brought some advantages. While it was apparent, that Dean didn’t want to let Lucifer near Sam, he also didn’t want to leave him unsupervised. Bur Azrael disappearing with Lucifer had taken away all their other options.

The smell of whisky lingered in the air, as Azrael shoved a few bottles aside, to gain better access to the couch. His knees trembled and he sank down next to the sofa. Only now he noticed the strain in his wings and the sore feathers. Exhaustion made itself noticeable. His grace pulsed lightly. Breaking through the binding circle had demanded a lot of his strength. The high he had felt, when he killed Anna had vanished and his limbs felt heavy. Azrael’s eyelids fluttered shut. Sensing Lucifer’s body shiver, he wrapped his wings around him, then he dozed off.

„We get him the Hell away from here... Lucifer will probably wake up any second.“, a voice said, the muffled steps on the floor. The noises of somebody walking around. ‘Dean’, Azrael realized, as his consciousness resurfaced for a moment. His grace brushed against the mind of every being in this room, to make sure it was safe. Gabriel nudged back, a sign of acknowledgement. Dean walked restlessly through the room, while Sam leaned against the table. Azrael could picture him, arms crossed and bitchface on point, radiating his frustration everywhere. Bobby just stood in the doorway, his calm presence toning down the mood in the room. He stood often nowadays, since he had regained his ability to walk. A warm feeling washed through Azrael’s chest, as his grace brushed Cas’. He seemed a bit ruffled, but otherwise okay. He shared a moment of mutual amusement with Gabriel, as he noticed Cas’ wings reaching for Dean and pulling back in unison with the Hunters pacing. But his exhaustion took the upper hand and he fell asleep again.

 

Azrael felt better. His grace was swirling lively through his core and the tension in his wings was gone. His attention shifted, as he sensed Lucifer in his still unconscious body. The angel of Death opened his eyes. Beside Gabriel nobody had noticed, that he was awake yet. Azrael knew, that Lucifer wasn’t dead. Now, in possession of his whole grace, he could feel the life of every being, just like a human knew how to breathe. It was easy. But he couldn’t deny the cold fear, he had felt, as soon as he had seen his body laying on the ground. Throat cut and a bullet between his eyes. Azrael looked at the Winchesters, eyes glowing bright with anger. He knew it wasn’t there fault- he should have been there, but still...

Sam and Dean were currently arguing with Gabriel over something, Castiel standing silently in the background. „What do you mean, with ‘It didn’t work’?!“ Sam asked, back turned on Azrael.

„It didn’t work, obviously! Something went wrong. Hell, I don’t know everything. You try to shift the binding of Death to somebody else!“, the Trickster said, his wings curled around him protectively, despite his aggressive stance.

„Do you think, that Anna has something to do with it?“, Cas suddenly interfered. „That she manipulated the ritual?“ Gabriel seemed thoughtful, but it was only a mask.

„Then what should we do now?“, Dean asked, standing next to his brother. Miraculously the rational person in this.

„Az, you okay?“ Gabriel asked, causing everyone to look at him. But Azrael didn’t answer, because he felt Lucifer stir. Gabriel’s gaze shifted, the same moment as his. Then, with a gasp, the body’s chest rose with a deep breath.

 

The vessel felt wrong. It had before. Restraining. Just like the pile of flesh, that it was. But now? It felt like it belonged to him. He felt the ache in the lung, like it was his. The flesh on his throat still tender and sore. The heavy limbs strangely connected and different from his wavelength form. And the strangest sensation were the goosebumps on his arms. With much effort, he sucked in a deep breath, resisting the urge to cough. As the pleasant air reached his lungs, Lucifer opened his eyes.

He blinked a few times, his eyesight blurry. He felt weak. And he hated it. Lucifer looked upon a wooden ceiling, a lonely spider crawling around in a dusty cobweb. He tried to expand his grace, to scan his surroundings. The only response he got, was the feeling of a dark empty hole in his core. What two seconds ago had been a dull throbbing ache in the back of his mind, now became a constant sore place, where once had burned a cold power.

Suddenly his memory snapped into place. Azrael. A bullet and then pain. Lucifer jumped to his feet accompanied by a surprised gasp from his left and immediately stumbled. He was caught by strong hands. He was still enough of an angel to recognize the grace. Azrael. Quickly he took a step back, standing on his own feet. Ignoring the small flicker of hurt in the bright eyes next to him and the wings, which still surrounded him protectively.  
Denying any sort of leaning in the rare touch, he stood tall, jaw lifted up and the slightest bit of a sneer on his face. ‘They were all beneath him.’ Instead of giving away any kind of weakness, Lucifer proceeded to scan the room and the persons within. Look grazing Bobby Singer, who had just entered and the older Winchester, lingering only a second longer on Sam. The sneer disappeared, as his eyes spotted something, he hadn’t anticipated.  
„It’s almost like a family reunion, don’t you think Gabriel? You got out of the holy fire quicker than I expected.“ Lucifer grinned. „And you must be Castiel.“, he said looking at the Angel next to his brother. The inky black wings of the young one protectively wrapped around the oblivious Dean Winchester. Lucifer just raised an eyebrow. „Protecting a human?“, he snorted. „Why?“, he said, wearing an expression of confusion mixed with disgust. It was such a strange gesture. Lucifer decided to keep an eye on that unusual behavior. He was curious about this _bond_ between these two.

„Well brother. You seem like a changed man. Or should I say human?“, Gabriel interfered, a strange smile on his face. „It’s almost ironic. How the tables have turned.“

‘He dared to compare him to these filthy humans?!’ „Where. Is. My. Grace?“, Lucifer asked a dark look on his face.

„It’s a bit to late for that“, Michael’s Vessel said. Lucifer turned around, quickly like a viper.

„Shut up, I’m not talking to you.“, Lucifer spat out and he snapped his fingers, waiting for the human to turn into a gooey mass of blood and flesh. Nothing happened. Well not really nothing. As soon as he had tried to explode the human, his pet angel, Castiel appeared right in front of him. Lucifer flinched back, as he saw the determinate look in his face, eyes blazing with grace. His black wings were raised high, hand already outstretched to grip his throat. The arm was caught by Azrael midair. His eyes also glowing bright with grace.

„Out, now! All of you.“ Castiel took a step back.

„Be aware, you don’t hold the power here. Not anymore. Harm any of them and I will destroy you.“, Castiel said with earnest voice, looking directly into his eyes. Then he left the room, shortly after followed by the others, Bobby Singer muttering something about being ordered around in his own house.

„Gabriel, you too. Now is not the time...“, Azrael said and the Messenger left, if reculantly. Then, Azrael turned around to look at him. His expression softened.

„I don’t need your pity.“, Lucifer spat, not telling, that the others leaving had lifted a weight off his shoulders, but nevertheless...“I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself!“

„No you are not.“, Azrael said. An Angel almost consumed your whole grace.“, he stated calmly. Lucifer paled at that. He had thought the bullet had caused the damage upon his grace, or they had taken it. Numbing it or whatsoever. It would have recovered quickly, but if his grace had been ripped out of his being... it was lost, the part that had been consumed. He hadn’t realized that he was trembling, until Azrael wrapped his wings around him even tighter and started talking again. „I killed her.“

„Good“, was all he could reply. He would have to live like a human. He could already feel the first signs, of what he thought was hunger and exhaustion. This body hadn’t had something inside its stomach, since Nicks last meal.

„Everything alright. You need anything?“, Azrael asked, his eyes following him like a falcon. Lucifer felt the remaining grace twist his core, where his wings were locked away. Wanting to unfold and reach out, but they couldn’t.

„No“, Lucifer said. He was still an Angel. Lucifer wouldn’t give in to such a human urge like eating. He didn’t need food to sustain himself. He had his grace. Azrael raised an eyebrow. Lucifer felt like a fledgling again, being pinned by this intense look. It felt so unreal.

„We’ll talk tomorrow. Get some sleep.“, Azrael said.  
Sleeping. Angels didn’t need sleep. But it was either this, or being confronted with his human urges. Without another word, he turned back to lay down on the couch. The blanket, that was spread out over his body two seconds later, was left was left without a comment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what you think about Lucifer. Did I get him right? Please comment!
> 
> Ps. Lucifer is very weak right now, almost human and Cas could kill him if he wanted to, or hurt him really bad. But Lucifer can hear the Angels talk, and he still perceives everything like an Angel including wings and grace and stuff.


	14. Dealing (Previous to: Sam, Interrupted)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few of Deans thoughts. And Lucifer also has some issues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there is the next chapter and Azrael and Lucifer finally get to talk a little. 
> 
> I'm sorry that the uploading is quite chaotic right now, but I still try to update every week. As much as it is possible.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 14:

_Dreams_ <\--- are written like this.

(Previous to: Sam, Interrupted)

 

 

Five days. It had been five fucking days and Lucifer annoyed the Hell out of him. „What?!“, Dean snapped at Gabriel, who sat in front of him, at Bobby’s kitchen table. The Trickster stopped his staring and instead looked at the beer, Dean held in his hands.

„You seem tense Dean-O“, the Archangel answered, gaze returning back to his face.

Dean loosened the grip, he had on the bottle and the blood returned into his almost white knuckles. „Oh, do I? Take a wild guess why.“, he answered sarcastically.

Gabriel leaned back in his chair and took another chocolate bar from the bowl of candy next to him, that seemed to refill ever so often. The day Lucifer arrived at Bobby’s was a mix of feelings. Hell, the Devil was in the same house, as his brother, Cas and Bobby! But on the other hand, they could have an eye on him. Lucifer wouldn’t be able to fight, or even continue his plans for the ongoing Apocalypse in the state he was right now. Cas had said, that there was almost no grace remaining and Gabriel had confirmed this statement. And the picture of Cas threatening Lucifer...

Every time the memory resurfaced, a familiar heat coiled in his gut. He couldn’t deny that he was kinda turned on. Since Dean had admitted his feelings for the Angel to himself, he couldn’t help but wonder what the guy hid beneath his trench-coat. There was a lot of staring and imagining. It didn’t help, that Cas practically acted like he was his bodyguard, since Lucifer lived here. Personal space wasn’t even an option anymore. Apart from the following him like a puppy, Cas watched Lucifer’s every movement like a hawk. It had taken Dean a lot of convincing, to be able to go to the bathroom on his own. Sam had teased him mercilessly for that. It was Deans luck, that Sam didn’t know, that he had only won the argument, by allowing Cas to watch over him, while he slept.

They still hadn’t talked about the thing, that had happened in Carthage. Should he tell Cas how he felt? Maybe the Angel didn’t even know, what that kiss meant for Dean. Perhaps, he thought it was a sign of friendship. When he thought about it, Cas hadn’t really kissed him back. Maybe he just didn’t want to hurt Deans feelings. Cas was an Angel after all. A celestial being. Dean took another swig. He needed time to think about this first. Taking a shower, while the Angel stood in front of the door didn’t count. As much as he liked being near Cas, Dean was glad that the Angel was out right now. It was good for him to distance himself from the situation for a while and for Dean to get some privacy. After insisting, that Gabriel would be able to look out for him and it was only for two hours, Cas had agreed to ‘help’ Bobby, to get some groceries.

Dean looked up from his bottle, to watch Gabriel. He seemed deep in thought. It was almost ironic, that the Trickster was the only person beside himself, that didn’t seem to know, how to act around Lucifer. Dean had just decided to ignore the Devil. He didn’t know, how to talk to the Archangel, so this was the easiest solution.

It had gotten harder, since Lucifer had chosen to swap from complaining about his human urges, to actually starting to give in to them. After claiming Dean’s room as his, the company had only gotten worse. Dean could count the times, that he had prepared a sandwich and it had just vanished from his plate, while he looked the other way, only to be eaten by Lucifer, a smug grin on his face. Dean didn’t know, if he did it purposefully to annoy him, or if he simply was such an asshole. Yesterday evening, the last piece of the remaining pie had been stolen by Lucifer. Dean had been ready to throw his common sense overboard to punch him in his face. The only thing that stopped him from doing so, was Cas hand on his shoulder, despite the Angel being seemingly ready to do the same, simply out of principle. While Cas shot angry looks at Lucifer, as soon as he entered the room, Gabriel didn’t know what to do. On time, he acted nice, the other time he ignored Lucifer. By what Dean had seen, right now, he just flew away three second before Lucifer entered the room he was in.

Sam on the other hand, had started to talk to the guy. He acted all nice, arguing, that this was the chance to redeem the Devil and all that crap. This was one of the reasons Dean was this tense. His brother actually tried to teach Lucifer about humanity. He was probably talking to Devil right now. Dean couldn’t find the sense in that. Bobby talked to Lucifer, just like he would talk to any hunter. Dean couldn’t help, but being impressed by that attitude, but even Bobby had his limits regarding the Devil. He often worked outside, or got groceries and other things, they didn’t really need. And there was Azrael.

If Castiel was Dean’s bodyguard, Azrael was Lucifer’s. He acted like a mother-hen, from what Dean had seen. If the Archangel hadn’t been there, Castiel would long have tried to stab Lucifer, that was for sure. But the ice-cold glares the Angel received every-time he was on the edge of punching the Devil, kept him at bay. Gabriel had stopped the constant pranking. It was more disturbing to see the Archangel act serious, than he had anticipated. Dean had expected at least one comment, about Cas following like a shadow, or Sam’s therapeutic lessons with the Devil, but no. The only thing, the Trickster did, was munching mountains of candy. „You don’t look like a ray of sunshine either.“, Dean said to celestial being in front of him. Gabriel snorted, but didn’t look up, as he proceeded to build a pyramid out of chocolate bars. Dean hesitated. „If you wanna talk...“ Gabriel laughed. A full blown laugh, the first for three days. Dean already regretted his decision as he saw the mischievous spark return to Gabriel’s eyes.

„A Winchester offered me, to talk about feelings.“ Gabriel wiped away tears of laughter. At least now, he seemed like his old self again. „Tell you what, if I am going to tell you about my issues, you gotta tell me about yours.“

„I’m gonna search for a case.“, Dean said and he emptied his bottle in one swig. The chair scratched the floor, as he stood up, to retrieve Sam’s Laptop.

„Yeah, that’s what I thought.“, Gabriel answered, still amused. Just as Dean was about to leave the room, the former Trickster started talking again. Dean stopped dead in his tracks.

He didn’t return to the kitchen for three hours, the words of the Archangel still spinning in his mind. „He loves you. Everybody can see that. Just talk to Castiel.“

 

Azrael knew he was an asshole. He had practically ignored Gabriel for the last five days and the only interaction with Castiel that he had, was staring him down, until he stopped looking at Lucifer, like he wanted to fulfill his promise. He hadn’t really talked to the non-angelic beings in the household, because he followed Lucifer like a shadow. Sam was the only human Lucifer remotely tolerated and Azrael gladly let Sam talk to Lucifer the whole time, hoping it would change some of his opinions. The only success he had, was that Lucifer had started to eat food and that he used the toilet, despite complaining every time this occurred. He didn’t have the heart to have a real conversation with Lucifer yet, after the first night.

 

After Azrael had covered Lucifer with a blanket, this first day, the Archangel had quickly fallen asleep. He had watched him, pale moonlight the only source of light, as Lucifer’s chest rose with every breath, Azrael’s wings brushing his sleeping form. Sometimes on the edge of waking up, but then again in peaceful slumber. After a while, he could hear the other going upstairs, to sleep. Inside his mind, he felt Gabriel’s presence. A silent request. With a last look he flapped his wings to reappear in the kitchen, Gabriel sitting in one of the chairs at the table. „He’s asleep.“, Azrael said after a moment of silence, as he also sat down.

„I know.“

„What are you thinking?“

„I dunno. What do you think?“

„He’s changed. Bitter. But I think he is still the same“, Azrael said.

Gabriel looked uncertain. „To be honest, I doubt that. He is too angry. That’s all he cares about. His revenge.“

Azrael looked at Gabriel intensely. „You can’t see past this. He wronged you, didn’t he? You still hold a grudge against him, because of how he treated you, when he and Michael were fighting.“

„How can I not? Me and Raphael, we were ignored. They tore through my grace, did you know? The last time, I tried to step between them. I don’t think it was intentional, I was just too close, but they didn’t notice. It was the last time I tried to stop them.“ Azrael listened silently. „And now, you can’t deny that he did some horrible things. He sacrificed a whole town of people.“

„Don’t tell me, that you didn’t take human sacrifices, when you were worshiped as Loki. You killed many people. You judged them and killed them, because you thought what they were doing was wrong.“ Azrael interfered. „Well, what they did was probably wrong, but nevertheless, you don’t get to judge him because of that.“

„I never laid hand to a child.“ Gabriel said defensively, voice slightly raised.

„I know. And I don’t judge you because of that. Hell, I’ve done bad things. Or things I considered bad, when I was human. Probably now too.“

„But you noticed Lucifer’s vessel.“, Gabriel suddenly changed the topic. Azrael nodded.

„Why didn’t he fix it? He would have been able too.“, the Angel of Death said.

„Maybe it’s because of the soul? Hell, I don’t know his motives. We’ll have to see what he is going to do, now that he is almost human.“ And Gabriel grinned at that.

„Don’t be a dick becau...“, Azrael paused and Gabriel also looked up. In the room next to them, Lucifer’s breath hitched and the could hear a small whimper. Azrael exchanged a look with Gabriel and with a flutter of wings, he vanished to appear right next to Lucifer. He was dreaming.

 

_Lucifer was angry. So so angry. Cold rage burning through the core, covering all of his surroundings with a thin flowers of ice. He screamed and cursed and prayed to his father, but that didn’t change the fact, that he was alone. Alone in an empty dark space. A cage._

_He screamed for a long time. His wings hurt, as they were burnt and slashed by Michael, ‘His beloved brother’, he thought sarcastically, as he trashed and clawed at the walls, of this small dimension, that held him prisoner. The cage was sealed. Hundreds and hundreds of seals, etched into the restricting walls, made by his father. His fathers energy lingering on the seals and restrictions, mocking him. For a human, the time would have been endless. Thousands of years coming and going, as he hit the walls and cursed his father and Michael._

_Slowly the fury drained away and an left him feeling hollow. He pulled his wings as close as he could. He was alone. No one answered him. The Angels in heaven talked. He could hear them, but nobody seemed to listen to him, not Michael, not his father. The connection to the other Archangels didn’t buzz with the familiar sound of the voices of his brothers. Azrael’s connection was an empty place. It was like he had lost a limb a long time ago. Like phantom pain, it sometimes felt like there was something, but then...nothing. Michael had pulled his presence far away, and Raphael felt dull. He hadn’t paid much attention to his other brothers and Lucifer regretted it. The empty space, where normally Gabriel’s energetic presence could be felt was like a fresh wound. His connection was severed._

_Lucifer curled into himself. His grace flickering, growing duller and duller. It was just so cold. Not like the cold remaining within him, no. The cold surrounding him came with the darkness. It swallowed the light of his core. While he burned the brightest, he still couldn’t light up the edges of the cage. He shook, curled up in the center of the cage, searching with his grace, to find something, anything to cling onto. But the only thing that was there were the wards, holding him in place. There was nothing he could feel, nothing he could sense._

_Lucifer wept, he cried silently inside the cage, the only sound was the cracking of the ice, that slowly spread from the center, creeping up to cover the whole prison. Never had he been without a sibling. Never without feeling love. Even when he had fought with Micheal, he had still felt loved. He was made from love... to love. The always present feeling, only noticed with its absence._

 

Azrael had tried to enter Lucifer’s mind, and he saw everything Lucifer had to go through. A single tear rolled down his cheek as his focus was on the memories of his brother. Lucifer dreamed of the cage. He wasn’t able to wake him from this.

Only when Azrael wrapped his physical wings around Lucifer’s sleeping form, his brother had stopped whimpering. The rest of the night, he had stayed beside his brother, watching over him like a hawk. He had felt Gabriel vanish in the other room. He didn’t return until the first beams of sunlight lit up the house, highlighting the small pieces of dust floating in the air.

Over the course of the next five days, Azrael protective side had been awakened. He followed Lucifer like a shadow. Lucifer wasn’t even aware of it, but he seemed more at ease when it was cold. Also, he acted like an asshole towards the others. Azrael hadn’t spoken much with Lucifer. Partly because, he didn’t want to pressure him and partly because Lucifer didn’t talk much, besides complaining. At the second day, Azrael had convinced Lucifer to eat something. At least that lifted his mood. The Archangel couldn’t help but notice, that Lucifer ignored Gabriel to a big extent. Not that the former Trickster was any better.

It was strange, but he seemed to have some kind of interest in Castiel and Dean’s dynamic. Lucifer had started to provoke him at every minute possible. Castiel was probably to caught up in his anger to notice, but while Lucifer didn’t particularly care about Dean, he had started to tease him in every way imaginable, just to watch Castiel’s reaction with great curiosity. And Azrael watched it with great amusement. On the one hand there was Lucifer, who just didn’t seem to be able to understand Castiel, as he associated with a human like this. It was a curious thing for him. On the other hand there was Dean who was as fed up, as Cas was, but for the sake of the Angel stayed relatively calm, at least on the surface. Azrael could feel the annoyance boil beneath his skin.

But Castiel... While Lucifer had seemed to forgotten about Castiel’s threat, Azrael certainly hadn’t. And judging by Castiel’s looks he shot Lucifer every single second, he hadn’t either.

Azrael didn’t know, if Lucifer even acknowledged Bobby, but he seemed to tolerate Sam, maybe even like him. Sam acted, well, simply nice. He had asked if Lucifer wanted the use the bedroom, he normally occupied at Bobby’s house. And while Lucifer had denied that offer and simply claimed Deans room, just to get a reaction out of the two. And a reaction he got. This was the only time, Dean was about to punch Lucifer and go through with it, Castiel supporting him in every way.

In the meantime, Sam even offered to explain different things, like technology or even human behaviour. It was not easy to get Lucifer to talk, but he had started listening to Sam rambling about various things, while he was eating or sitting elsewhere.

Thanks to Azrael’s grace, Lucifer didn’t have to shower, or brush his teeth yet. This factor prevented Deans room from being torn into pieces. While throughout the day, Lucifer wasn’t really happy, it was better than the nights. Every night so far he had dreamed about the cage. And if Lucifer woke up, covered in sweat, or even with tears rolling down his face, it wasn’t mentioned in the morning.

 

 

_Lucifer felt hollow. Never had he not felt the light of his father shining upon him. He wished back the old days, when they were still one family._

_He remembered listening to Azrael, endless vocals like a song, never ending, a wave of fondness, as he asked questions, unspoken, but thrumming through the connections of their minds, just when he wasn't older than a few thousand years. There was Michael, in all his holy glory, like he was made out of flames, burning hotter than the core of the sun.  He remembered Raphael being made. A small peace of grace, growing and growing, wings made of lightening and a voice like thunder. He remembered Gabriel, a bright spark, as bright as the first stars, they were flying by._

_The walls of the cage suddenly seemed so restricting, panic rising in his core. Violently beating his wings, Lucifer started to hit the seals of the cage again, but there was no exit. He fought and hit, until he sank down exhausted, wings hurting, his feathers strained, some of them broken. Calming himself, he, again, was in the center of the cage, where the seals were out of his grasp and the energy of his father was so faint, that he could almost pretend, it wasn’t there._

_He pulled out a few of the broken and damaged feathers from his wings. Lucifer screamed with frustration and pain. ‘Michael had thrown him in this Hellhole!’ Another bunch of feathers. ‘Obeying their father like the obedient little soldier he was. It was the fault of these pathetic humans.’ Another pluck. ‘How could his father demand that they worship these creatures? They did nothing but destroy and hurt.’ Another feather followed. It was neither broken nor damaged. ‘They didn’t possess a grace, they weren’t... He was an angel. How could Michael not see this. How could Raphael and Gabriel not see this. They were dogs compared to an Angel. Pretty to look at, but after all simply dogs, if not even lesser. Gabriel had done nothing to help him, nor had Raphael. It was the fault of their father. He built this cage, and Michael threw him down. He would get out of there and if the time would come, he would show them how pathetic they were.’_

_Lucifer clung to the little piece darkness, to these strange whispers from the back of his mind. The didn’t deserve his forgiveness. Revenge the only thing, that kept his mind sane, that kept him alive, as he started scratching the walls of the cage again. Not caring about the feathers upon feathers, that littered the ground, leaving his wings broken shells of their former glory._

With a gasp Lucifer woke up, the dark walls vividly in his mind. He dismissed the thoughts quickly. He was out of the cage. It shouldn’t concern him anymore. He had to focus.

Lucifer blinked into the darkness of the room. Had he possessed his full powers, the absence of light wouldn’t have bothered him at all. But now, reduced to an almost human being, he could barely make out the silhouette of Azrael, who leaned against the frame of the window. „Is everything alright?“, his brother asked. Lucifer resisted the urge to just turn around and to tell Azrael to ‘fuck off’.

„What do you think?“, he said sarcastically. It came out more raspy, than he had hoped for. ‘Damn this sleepy voice. Damn these dreams. The second day he had slept here, he had woken up in the middle of the night, dark walls and the feeling of abandonment still lingering in his mind. In the morning, his consciousness had risen, with Azrael laying on the bed, his wings curled around him protectively. The day after he hadn’t dreamed of the cage once, only to wake up in the same situation. Azrael was sleeping, really sleeping -what Angel would do this voluntarily?- next to him, shadowy wings curled around him once more. He didn’t need this kind of attention. He wasn’t a fledgling. He had done things, that made others tremble with fear! And he had told Azrael that much. His brother still followed him everywhere he went, but hadn’t tried to cuddle him in his sleep again.

The night after, he had dreamed of Michael and how he had sliced him up and thrown him into the cage. The hurt look on Michael’s face and the whispered apology, while he did so, did nothing to ease his rage at his brother. How dare he pretending to be the betrayed one! To be the one who was hurt in this process. It had been his choice to decide, whether to listen to their father or not. The dream today had not been much better.’

He heard Azrael sigh as he stepped closer. Lucifer refused to be towered over and sat up. Azrael sat down on the now empty space next to him. His brother didn’t even notice, that he acted like a human sometimes. „It wasn’t fair to throw you into this prison, to lock you up and ignore you for how long he did.“, Azrael said, as if he exactly knew, what he had been thinking about.

„No it wasn’t.“, Lucifer said with a bitter feeling.

„But what made him do it?“, Azrael asked hesitantly. „What did you do?“

„What did I do?!“ Lucifer was enraged. Fury made its way through his veins. Lucifer was enraged. „HE made these little creatures. These filthy, pathetic beings and told us to bow before them! He made the Angels. We were bright and pure, we loved him. I loved him!“, Lucifer shouted. „I worshiped him more than anything. Still after all he had done, but then he demanded that we worship these creatures, these humans!“, he spat. „Those selfish creatures. They hurt and lied to each other. But they also disgraced him. And it didn’t even bother him. Not really.“ Lucifer swallowed and he stopped in his shouting, although his voice was still raised. „I decided to show him, how they really were.“ Lucifer felt Azrael’s wings around him, but he continued to talk staring at the blank wall. „But he just got angry. I talked to Michael, I wanted his support, to help me convince him. Or even, to get father listen to me. But Micheal beat me down until I was lying on the ground and told me, how I could go against the wishes of my father.

But he didn’t see. Our father didn’t see how flawed they were and he demanded, that we would bow before the humans. How could he ask this from me? I who had given everything, would have given everything for him, but now he asked me to worship these humans? To bow before creatures, that were full of sin. I couldn’t do it...And then, Michael cast me down.“ ‘Into the cage.’ There was only silence.

Something wet ran down his cheeks. Lucifer hadn’t realized, that he had been crying. Out of surprise, he sucked in his breath, in a sudden motion. Azrael had leaned forward and hugged him. His brothers arms were wrapped around him tightly, he was pulled close. Azrael’s wings brushed against his back. „I am sorry. I should have been there. For you. For all of you.“ Lucifer listened quietly. „But it’s not the fault of the humans.“ Lucifer wanted to protest, but Azrael hushed him. „They didn’t asked to be worshiped. They are not all as flawed as you think they are. Give them a chance. Look at them. Not only the ones who do evil. The ones who try to be good.“ He let that sink in for a moment. Lucifer wasn’t willing to admit it, but Azrael had touched something in him and he was maybe willing to do so. Only maybe. „You should go back to sleep.“, Azrael said and pulled back. „You need it to recover.“ Lucifer pulled up the blanket and turned his back to Azrael, as he closed his eyes. He didn’t complain when Azrael stayed where he was. And the warm feeling, that rose in his chest upon this, was certainly not a mix of grateful- or even happiness. He fell asleep, the slightest smile on his face and with the familiar wings protectively curled around him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like to think, that Lucifer is quite fascinated about Castiels and Deans relationship, because for him and Angel that cares for/loves a human is quite the anomaly.
> 
> The next chapter will probably focus more on Sam, Dean and Cas. I'm going to send them to the Asylum with the wraith, but i cannot guarantee how long the hunt lasts if there is an Angel involved.
> 
> I hope Lucifer wasn't too out of character. And even if, i hope it doesn't bother you that much :) He will certainly act more like his 'usual' self around the Winchesters. Also do you think I should write in Azrael/Lucifer? 
> 
> Please leave a comment! I hope you have a nice day, or night, whenever you read this.


	15. The thoughts of an Angel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little glimpse of Castiel's thoughts. (Of Dean)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At last there is a new chapter, even if it's not really long. It's just that there is so much stuff, going on right now. I don't think that I can keep up with uploading one chapter a week. (well, the last chapter already was a week late), I'll still try though, but no promises. I will just upload as it comes.
> 
> This chapter is all Love and Destiel.
> 
> I'm sorry, for the people who are waiting for a new chapter (And very happy, that there are people, who read/like this), so here's a small chapter, so that you have at least something to read. 
> 
> I'm happy about every comment and kudo. Please let me know what you think.

Chapter 15:

(Kinda at the beginning of Sam, Interrupted)

 

Castiel looked up at the gray sky, the sun hidden behind a thick layer of clouds. It was a windy day. The angel could smell the approaching rain, as he stood between the rusty cars in Bobby’s backyard. Three hours and the first drops would hit the ground.

Castiel didn’t move, as he heard the familiar _whump_ , of the Impala’s trunk falling shut. He couldn’t see the black Chevy or the two brothers, who had checked guns and knives a last time. Several cars separated him from them.

The heavy weight in his stomach reminded him, why he stood here in the first place. His feelings confused him still from time to time. Right now, what he felt wasn’t a nice feeling. He was angry. No. He had been angry at first, but anger usually didn’t trigger this ache in his chest. Castiel remembered what had caused him to stare at the cloudy sky, which seemed to reflect his mood very well.

Dean didn’t want him around. He didn’t outright say it, but it was obvious, what he meant, when Castiel had talked to him earlier this day...

 

„No, Cas you don’t have to come with us. It’s just a simple case. Nothing me and Sam couldn’t handle.“

„I am an Angel. If I am coming with you, we could find the monster much faster.“, Castiel had answered.

„Look“, Dean had said, a sigh on his lips as he looked over to the Impala, where Sam roamed around in the trunk. „We don’t even know if it is a real case. Martin is a bit... paranoid“

„But I don’t mind helping you.“, the Angel had replied. Dean then had shifted his weight and avoided too look in Cas eyes. After a few moments of silence had passed, only disturbed by the crunching gravel beneath Deans boots, Castiel suddenly realized.

„But you mind...“ Cas felt strange, like he had been punched. Another sigh from Dean.

„It isn’t...“, Dean had said while he rubbed his neck. „This situation is totally fucked up. This house", Dean gestured at Bobby's house, "is a madhouse right now. There’s devil, who sleeps in my room and his self-proclaimed bodyguard, who looks like he is about kill you, if you even look at him wrong, Gabriel, who acts nothing like himself... Don't even know, why he still sticks around. Even Bobby is more grumpy than usual... I just need some space.“ The unspoken ‘ from you’ left a bitter taste in his mouth.

Castiel didn’t know what to reply after this speech of Dean. So he didn’t say anything at all. With a flap of wings he was gone.

Unbeknownst to Dean, he reappeared not far away, hidden from the human eye. The Angel didn’t hear Deans silent „Damnit“ or the stone, he kicked away, hitting one of the damaged cars. He was too wound up in his emotions.

 

Castiel recalled how he had felt in the little hardware store in Carthage.

The warmth and lightness, that caused his Grace to twist happily, despite the pain he was in, at that time. He knew this feeling, had experienced it in so many ways, but never like this. Castiel had known it, since the beginning of his existence. Felt it, surrounded by his siblings, in the connection to Heaven, to his father. But when he had seen the bright soul down in the pit. How it shone with such beauty, surrounded by all darkness and evil, he had found it again.

It was similar, to the feeling he knew, but also so different from what he had experienced until that moment. It was foreign and strange, and at first he hadn’t known what it was.

 

Putting the soul back in its body was an order. He did so, honored to be the one, to be chosen for this task. But this wasn’t all he did. Back then Castiel hadn’t understood the reason behind his doing. There was no order to fix the soul, to mend its cracks with his own grace. He wasn’t ordered to take away some of the pain, that the soul endured. He couldn’t name the reason behind this at that time. It felt like the right thing to do, Dean would’ve said.

He was ordered to watch the righteous man. Castiel couldn’t help, but being fascinated by this human. There were times when he found himself confused by Deans behaviour. Or human behaviour in general. But Castiel continued his watch. Observed.

The Angel had watched humanity for a long time. Castiel had always found them quite fascinating. But it was not before Dean, that he really looked...and felt. It wasn't until then, that he learned that even God’s brightest warriors weren’t always right. That having an untainted core didn’t mean that you were better then others. That the dark parts in a soul were equally important and that perfection equals virtue. That he learned, that scars could be beautiful.

Every day, there would be something new. A new facet, a new piece of the puzzle that made out Dean Winchester. And only then Castiel had realized what this emotion was. The fierce protectiveness, the warm feeling when he saw Dean happy. Why his grace was singing with joy, every time he made Dean smile.

Love.

Not much changed, apart from the fact, that he was constantly aware of this feeling. Castiel had been content, supporting Dean. Continuing what he had always done. He did, what he thought was right.

But Carthage...

When Dean had kissed him, everything changed.

Castiel had not expected to survive this last mission. He would have died a sweet death. But he survived, and everything changed.

The selfless love, he had always known, turned in something more selfish. For once, he wanted something for himself. He wanted Dean.

After he had been shown, what he could have, Castiel was no longer satisfied with what he had. It was sinful to think this way. Castiel knew that. He had tried to continue his way of living.

He didn’t approach Dean and the Hunter acted like he always did, even if it was only on the outside. Castiel sensed Deans meddled up thoughts and confused feelings. Their connection had always been strong. But if Dean decided, that he didn’t want this - Castiel didn’t even really know, what this ‘this’ was, that he wanted - he wouldn’t be the one to force the Hunter to do something, that he was uncomfortable with. It wasn’t Castiel’s choice.

Regardless of all his elaborate thoughts, there was always this picture lingering in the back of his mind. The picture of what could be. And it hurt, the rejection. Throughout the course of the last few days, he had more than once wished, that this feeling would disappear. But too long had he lived the life of an emotionless being,  if he was honest, he wouldn't want to miss a second of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dean is just a bit insecure, he doesn't really wanna hurt Cas. But it will be good for him, to have some time to think about everything that's going on. 
> 
> Hopefully I can include some Sam-Cas friendship somewhere in the near future. Their relationship hasn't gotten the attention it deserves. 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it. This fanfic has grown quite a bit.


	16. Crazyness and a little bit of Courage (Sam, Interrupted)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Sam try to hunt that wraith, but there are more difficulties than anticipated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is focused on Destiel a bit of angst a bit of fluff. Mostly Deans pov. Dark thoughts because of the wraith.

Chapter 16:

(Sam, Interrupted)

It was silent in the car, but Sam could practically feel Deans mood thickening the air. He sighed and looked at Dean. He couldn’t bear this silence anymore. „Something happen between you and Cas?“ Dean shot him an icy glare and then proceeded to stare at the road again.

„Look, you gotta talk to someone at some point Dean. You can’ t just push it all down. You’ve been acting off for days now.“

„I...“, Dean started. „Know what? It doesn’t matter“, his brother said suddenly. Sam just continued to look at Dean. His older brother sighed, as he realized, that Sam wouldn’t be the one to give in first. „I... I think I like Cas.“, Dean said, looking firmly at the road ahead of them.

„I know.“, Sam answered. ‘He never doubted, that Dean loved the angel, but he had never really thought that Dean was in love with Cas, always brushed it off as an imagination of his messed up brain. Dean was straight. He didn’t like guys. At least, he would deny any association with him being gay. Of course Sam had thought about it. Sometimes. There were times when Dean would just look at guy a certain way. Even unconsciously. Sam also recalled some encounters earlier on, when Dean would just stare a moment too long, for it to be entirely platonic. And if Sam asked him about it, he would always brush it off. Dean had been John’s boy through and through. At least that was what he had thought. He stopped asking after the third time Dean denied it. Well, obviously he had been wrong.

That was before he had left for College. But after he had caught a glimpse of Cas and Dean together , after Carthage... It was so obvious. The times Dean straightened Cas’ tie, the personal space, or lack thereof. The endless staring contests. How could he miss that?’ Sam knew, he would probably lose the bet with Gabriel.

„No, I mean... really like.“, Dean said. Was his brother blushing!? ‘Holy shit’ Sam would’ve teased the hell outta him, if it wasn’t such a serious topic for his brother. Yet, a little smile found its way on his face anyways.

„I know. It was pretty obvious.“, Sam answered.

„So does this mean, that everyone knew but me?!“ Dean said and Sam could see him practically wanting to bash his head against the steering-wheel.

„Nah, I didn’t really either. Gabriel of all people had to point it out to me. Now, when I think about it, there were many signs. And after Carthage-“ Dean blushed even harder. Sam raised an eyebrow. If Sam could pride himself on something, it was, that knew his brother. Dean was obviously hiding something. „Did-“, Sam leaned towards Dean. „Did something happen in Carthage, that you didn’t tell me?“, Sam asked with a sly little grin. Dean shot him a quick glance and then looked firmly at the road. „Aw, come on Dean!“, Sam said as he backed up again. Dean sighed in defeat.

„I may have...“ Dean stopped again.

„Have done what?“, Sam asked curiously.

„I may have kissed him.“

Sam’s jaw dropped. If he had expected something, it surely wasn’t that. He knew that Dean was very straightforward if he wanted something. But while he hadn’t seen Dean with many people, that he really wanted to be with, he knew, that these kinds of feelings were an entirely different matter for his brother. Sam had rarely seen Dean approaching people he felt something for, but Cas had been dying there. Maybe this had shattered Deans self-imposed rules. He had known something was up... no wonder Dean had seemed so distracted.’ During his little thought session, Sam hadn’t realized, that his brother had continued his talking. Apparently now, that he had started to open up, everything seemed to pour out.

„...and now he follows me around everywhere! I didn’t have a minute of privacy throughout the last few days.“ Dean talked even faster. „And then he doesn’t know what personal space means. At all! Two days ago, I woke up in the middle of the night and I swear, I almost shot him. He just stood there with his pretty eyes and kept staring. I’ve practically been living with this guy breathin’ up my neck. And you, I mean you don’t need a bodyguard, right? You just walk around in the house and you even talk to Lucifer, but me? Not that I wanna talk to Lucifer, but every time I get closer to him than five steps-“

„Dean,“, Sam took pity on Dean and interrupted him with an amused face, „you are rambling.“ „Oh“ Dean suddenly stopped slightly embarrassed. „Let’s just say you get my point, right?“ Sam hummed in agreement a smile on his face.

„It’s just, I need to think about this. And if Cas is around, like all the frickin’ time-“ Dean suddenly looked at Sam and he groaned as he saw the smug expression.

„Argh, why am I even telling you? I’m already regretting it.“ „Why?“, Sam said smirking, „because you just told me, that you get distracted if Cas is around with his pretty eyes?“

„Oh, shut up!“ Dean said and turned on the music trying to sound angry, but the corner of his mouth twitched treacherously.

„Jerk“, Sam replied as the first tunes of Led Zeppelin’s ‘Heartbreaker’ sounded through the car.

„Bitch“, Dean responded, now smiling. After a few moments listening to the song, felt the need to address one additional thing.

„I’m glad you told me, you know. I am happy for you if it works out. After all we’ve been through, I think we deserve to be happy.“

„Yeah, yeah we do.“, Dean answered quietly after a few seconds.

About 8 hours later they had arrived in Ketchum, Oklahoma.

 

It was the morning after, when they sat in an office, inside the building, which was the reason for this case. The Glenwood Springs Psychiatric Hospital.

The man on the other side of the desk looked through a file, which Dean knew was theirs. Well, their fake one at least. The doctor looked up and his gaze wandered from Dean to Sam and back down to the file. „You were referred to me by a Dr. Babar in Chicago.“, he said.

„That's right.“, Dean answered. „Isn't there a children's book about an elephant named Babar?“, the Doc asked. He didn’t know how right this statement was, because that was exactly where they had picked the name from. Dean shifted uncomfortably on his chair and quickly decided to change the topic.

„I don't know. I don't have any elephant books. Look, Doctor, I-I-I think the doc was in over his head with this one.“, he pointed at Sam, who sat on his left. „Cause my brother is... Dean made a crazy sign, circling his finger at the side of his head and whistled while doing so. Dr. Fuller raised a hand to stop him. Dean had to hold back a grin. This whole situation was hilarious.

„Okay, fine, thank you. That's-that's really not necessary.“ The guy grabbed his file and notepad. „Why don't you tell me how you're feeling, Alex?“, he asked Sam, who sighed.

„I'm fine. I mean, okay, a little depressed, I guess.“ The doc wrote something down and then continued his interrogation.

„Okay. Any idea why?“

„Probably because I started the apocalypse.“, Sam answered and Dean didn’t know how his brother could keep it together at the sight of the doc. Luckily the man didn’t look at him, but at Sam, otherwise he would have noticed him biting his lip, trying not to laugh.

„The apocalypse?“

„Yeah, that's right“

Dr. Fuller looked at Dean, who hoped that his expression could be confused with a reassuring smile. „And you think you started it?“, the doc asked Sam.

„Well, yeah, I mean...I killed this demon, Lilith, and I accidentally freed Lucifer from hell. So now, he's topside, and we're trying to stop him.“

Dr. Fuller looked at Dean searching for answers. „Who is?“

„Me. A-and him.“, Sam replied and pointed at Dean. „And his angel“, Sam said. On the outside no difference in his voice, but Dean could hear the teasing undertone. He resisted the urge to glare at Sam.

„Oh, you mean, like a...like an angel on your shoulder.“, the man said, obviously thinking, that he got something.

„No. His name's Castiel. He wears a trench coat.“, Sam answered. Dr. Fuller at a loss of words, just got back taking his notes.

„See what I mean, Doc? The kid's been beating himself up about this for months. The apocalypse wasn't his fault.“, Dean started and it was true what he said. The doc looked up stunned.

„It's not?“

„No. There was this other demon, Ruby. She got him addicted to demon blood, and near the end, he was practically chugging this stuff.“ Sam looked truly ashamed. The doc turned back to Dean.

„My brother's not evil. He was just...high...yeah? So, could you fix him up so we can get back to traveling around the country and hunting monsters?“, Dean delivered his line. The doc put up a finger for them to wait. He picked up his phone and dialed an extension.

„Irma...cancel my lunch.“ As the doctor hung up, Dean couldn’t help himself and patted Sam comfortingly on the arm, just to see the look on the face of the Doctor.

They stayed at least for another hour in that office.

An obnoxiously happy nurse led them out of the room and down the hall. „Doctor Fuller would like to keep you both under observation for a couple of days.“, she said.

„Both? Me, too?“, Dean replied to keep up appearances, but he exchanged a look with Sam, who smiled victoriously. The first part of their plan had been successful.

 

After a very thorough checkup by the nurse Dean waited outside the room, for Sam. Hell, he wasn’t against experimenting, but he would like to get to know the people who touched his sexy parts first. „How was your Silkwood shower?“, Dean asked Sam in his new outfit, who looked at least as disturbed, as he felt.

„Okay. Yeah, good. Yeah, good, um--good water pressure. Did the nurse...“

„She was very thorough.“

„Yeah. Yeah, good. Good. Yeah.“ Sam said and they were falling in an awkward silence. Dean looked around the lounge, and scanned the other patients. An older woman was playing with a pink bunny.

„I can't believe I let you talk me into this.“, he said, now really realizing, what he had agreed to.

„Hey, it's the least we could do. Martin saved Dad's ass more times than we can count. He's a great hunter.“, Sam said.

„Was. Until Albuquerque.“, he corrected his brother.

„Yeah, yeah. Oh look. There he is.“, Sam said and Dean turned around to follow Sam to the table where Martin was sitting. Sam cleared his throat and the Ex-Hunter turned away from the window to look at them.

„Sam, Dean, wow.“ He stood up to shake Sam’s hand. „Wow, you boys got big. You look good.“

„Thanks. You do, too, Martin.“ Sam answered. Dean thought that he seemed even more paranoid than ever, with all the nervous twitching, but who was he to judge?

„Uh...Well, thanks for coming.“, Martin said an motioned for them to sit down. Dean nodded and sat down, while Sam pulled up a chair from the table next to them. „In the old days, I could have taken care of this thing with both hands tied behind my back...but, well...now...“, Martin started.

„What do you think it is that we're hunting?“ Sam asked while Dean listened and watched out for people who could be overhearing something.

„I don't know yet. A ghost, demon, monster...animal, vegetable, mineral.“ Martin chuckled. „Hospital's had five deaths in the last four months. Doctors keep calling it suicides, but they're wrong.“

„So, you've seen this thing?“ Sam asked. Dean gave it up to look for possible eavesdroppers. They were in a fucking asylum. Nobody here would care if they talked about this stuff. He turned his attention back to the conversation to see Martin shaking his head.

„Has anyone seen this thing?“ Dean asked.

„Well, a couple patients have, uh...had glimpses, but there's not a lot to go on.“

„Are they reliable?“ Dean had his doubts.

„Oh, sure, why wouldn't they be?“, Martin said with all seriousness. Dean looked at the one patient who was dancing and singing in the middle of the room. „Gee, I don't know.“, he said sarcastically and looked back at Martin.

„I know you boys think I'm a bag of loose screws. Now, you wouldn't be wrong. But I wouldn't have called you unless there was something here. I can feel it in my gut.“ Sam looked at Dean. Yeah. Martin could be right.

„We believe you. Have you checked any of the bodies? Found signs of an attack?“, his brother asked.

„Well, uh, no...I don't go around dead b-b-b-bodies anymore.“ Dean frowned at Martins flinching, when he heard steps behind him.

„Alex, Eddie.“, the voice of the doctor said and they turned around to face him. „Well, I'm glad to see you're making friends. Why don't you and, uh, Mr. Creaser join us for group? Please. Right this way.“ They stood up to follow him, when the doc suddenly held an arm in front of Dean, successfully stopping him.

„Actually, I'm gonna be putting you in the afternoon group.“ Dean frowned.

„What? Why?“ The doc shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

„Well, to be frank, uh, the relationship that you have with your brother seems dangerously codependent. I think a little time apart will do you both good.“ He walked away and Dean stayed behind, waving Sam a small goodbye and he turned around to face the room. Well there had to be something to entertain oneself, right?

After a while, he found a chessboard. Bored to no ends, he decided, that this was better than sitting around. And the time passed quicker then anticipated. „King me!“ he said out loud and laughed. This was kinda funny. Suddenly a good looking woman with dark hair and blue eyes approached him.

„Eddie?“, she asked and Dean looked up. „I’m Dr. Erica Cartwright. I’ve been assigned to your case.“

„You’re my shrink?“ Dean said . She certainly fit his type, but as he saw her eyes, a very different person invaded the space in his mind. She just ignored his statement and opened her file.

„And you’re my...paranoid schizophrenic with narcissistic personality disorder and religious psychosis.“ And with that she closed her file and sat down at the other side of the table. „Can we talk?“ Dean shook his head to clear his thoughts from a certain angel and smiled at the woman charmingly.

„Yes. I actually got some questions for you.“

„What a coincidence.“, she replied. „I’ve got some for you, too.“

„Well, then... Quid pro quo, Clarice.“, Dean said smirking.

„Okay, Hannibal. I’ll go first. How many hours a night do you sleep?“

„Three or four, every couple of nights.“ Dean stopped for a moment lost in thought.

„It got better recently. What can you tell me about the recent suicides in here?“

„They were tragic.“

„But you haven’t noticed anything...strange, like, uh... I don’t know, black smoke or sulfur?“

„No. Why? What’s that supposed to mean?“, she asked. Dean thought about lying, but then what was the point in here?

„Demon signs. I hunt demons, monsters, that kind of thing.“

„How many drinks do you have a week?“

„Well, I gotta sleep sometime. So, uh, whats seven days times-- somewhere in the mid fifties. You ever feel any, uh, cold spots or get a chill walking through the hospital?“

„Not that I can remember. If I had?“

„It means there’s a ghost around“

„Okay. When was the last time, you were in a long term relationship?“

„Define long-term.“, Dean said.

„More than two months.“

„Never. Have the patients reported seeing anything weird?“

„In here?“, the doc chuckled.

„All the time.“

„Right.“

„So...“, Cartwright started as she leaned closer. „Let’s talk about your father...“

 

For the last ten minutes Dean had been walking aimlessly through the hospital. ‘This woman... Apparently, he wasn’t only schizophrenic, he also wasn’t able to form steady relationships. And his relationship with Sam wasn’t healthy either. At least that was what the doc said. Codependency, she had called it. And generally problems with forming lasting bonds and so on. Caused through the way of his upbringing...

Okay, John hadn’t been the best father, but he had tried at least...In the end he had died to protect him...’ Dean almost ran into another patient. ‘He didn’t have abandonment issues! He was left behind a few times. Now what?! And the thing with not trusting other people...If you knew that the guy in front of you could be a vamp, demon or shifter, who could blame you? A bit of paranoia didn’t hurt in his kind of business. Okay, Martins seemed a little too mu-’ He was apruptly pulled out of his thoughts by the familiar voice of his brother.

„Dean, hey!“ Dean turned around to face Sam, who walked out of the doorway behind him. Sam frowned as he looked at him. „You okay?“

„I just got thraped. So, no, I am not okay. Tell me you found something.“

„Yeah. A guy says he saw the creature. We should talk to him. You wanna meet here in an hour?“, Sam said.

„Yeah, sooner we take care of this thing, sooner we can get gone. This place gives me the creeps.“

„We could always ask Cas for help...“, Sam proposed.

„No, not right- whoa, hey girl, back up a bit.“ Dean dodged the young woman, who had tried to kiss him and brought a little space between them. She just looked at him for a second longer and then grabbed Sam and smashed their lips together, effectively wiping the grin off his brothers face.

„Hi“, she said after she pulled away from his brother.

„Hi“, replied Sam looking frazzled.

„I’m Wendy.“ „Uh-huh.“ She walked past them, but not after brushing Sam’s nether-regions casually. Sam jumped and now Dean was the one grinning at Sam who looked very uncomfortable. „Gotta sweeten up the time in prison, huh Sammy?“ His brother glared at him.

 

An hour later, Dean waited for Sam to pick the lock at his door. „Well, it’s about time. Nurses are on their rounds. We got, like, fifteen twenty minutes. So, where is this guy?“

„Room 306“, replied Sam , already heading down the Hall. Dean quickly followed him.

As they walked around a corner, they heard the screams. Dean shared a look of panic with Sam. The brothers started to run immediately. Sam hurriedly tried to pick the lock. Dean tried to see something trough the window, when suddenly feet were hitting the glass. ‘Oh god. They wouldn’t be quick enough.’ Sam still fumbled around with the lock, while Dean shouted at him to hurry up.

„Back off Dean!“, Sam shouted back and then he finally succeeded and the stormed into the room. ‘too late’ They were greeted with the sight of a man hanging down from a pipe at the ceiling, a tied bed sheet around his neck.

„Fuck!“, Dean cursed, as he ran a hand through his hair. Sam tried to feel for some kind of pulse, but he shook his head.

„Come on Dean, there is nothing we can do. Let’s get outta here.“ With a last look at the body, Dean quickly followed his brother out of the room. ‘They needed to find this monster.’

 

After they had investigated the body - they were almost caught by the happy gal - they talked to Martin. The brain of the guy had looked like a brown rock and now they were searching for a wraith, looking at the mirror images of every person walking by. Sam was watching the northern wing of the hospital Martin the opposite and Dean stood at the corner of the nurses’ station. There was a round mirror at the corner and Dean scanned every single person walking by. Suddenly a movement to his right, disrupted his watch. It was Doctor Cartwright. „What’s up, Doc?“, Dean asked, not looking away from the mirror.

„You tell me.“, she asked, as she leaned against the wall next to him.

„A wraith actually. Could be anybody.“

„So, I could be a monster?“

„No, you're clean.“, Dean said as he looked pointedly at her mirror image.

„Why you?“, she asked.

„Why me, what?“

„Why do you have to hunt monsters? Why not let someone else do it?“, Dr. Cartwright asked him. This woman seemed to see right through him. How often had he asked himself the same question? But he just shrugged and smiled.

„Can't find anybody else that dumb.“ But the doc continued to stare at him. „It's my job.“, Dean added after a second. „Somebody's gotta save people's asses, yours included.“ There was no place for doubts in this business. The hesitant ones ended like Martin. Once you hunted, you did it till you died.

„So, is there a quota? How many people do you have to save?

„All of them.“

„All of them? You think you have to save everyone?“

„Yep. Whole wide world of sports.“, Dean replied. „How?“ Dean didn’t answer her. Not everybody needed to know that the end of the world was still a possibility.

„Believe me, whatever you've got, I've heard weirder.“, she said and well. She wouldn’t believe him anyways so why bother.

„It's the end of the world, okay? I mean, it's a damn Biblical apocalypse, and if I don't stop it and save everyone, then no one will, and we all die.“, Dean said.

„That's horrible.“

„Yeah, tell me about it.“, Dean said an looked at the mirror again.

„I mean, apocalypse or no apocalypse...monsters or no monsters, that's a crushing weight to have on your shoulders. To feel like six billion lives depend on you...God...how do you get up in the morning?“ Dean stared at her face, the images of Sam, Cas and Bobby in his mind.

„That's a good question.“ His attention was pulled from the doc when Doctor Fuller walked past them.

„Hello, Eddie.“, he said.

„Doc.“, Dean acknowledged him with a nod. Casually he looked in the mirror. Shockingly he didn’t see the image of Dr. Fullers familiar face with his gray hair and dark eyes, but a rotten almost bald head, with white decaying eyes. He pushed himself from the wall and left Doctor Carthwright on her own.

 

He quickly looked for Sam and told him what he knew. After Sam hadfound some silvery blade-like thingies, they split up and searched for the monster, but the halls were suspiciously empty. He managed to evade Wendy one time but nothing in particular happened, until Martin came running from behind.

„Dean, thank god I found you. Doctor Fuller wasn’t the wraith. Sam got him, but-“, he panted.

 

Half an hour later Dean had found out, where Sam was kept and picked the lock. A quick look to the left and right and he opened the door. „You okay?“, he asked his brother. His pupils looked anything but normal. Dean took a few steps into his direction.

„No. No, I'm not okay. I--I am...awesome...“, Sam mumbled.

„They give you something?“ Dean looked at his brother with concern. He sat on the bed, leaning against the wall, obviously needing the support.

„Oh, yeah. They gave me...everything. It's spectacu-lacular.“ Sam laughed.

„You always were a happy drunk.“, Dean said the corners of his mouth twitching upwards. Dean jumped, as Sam pulled him close with serious eyes, not expecting such a quick reaction.

„Dean...the doctor...wasn't a wraith.“, Sam said, no real grip of personal space right now.

„I know.“ Dean wanted to laugh at the almost comically surprised look on Sam’s face. But then the older Winchester frowned. „I don't understand it. I mean, I saw it in the mirror. It wasn't human.“

„Or you're seeing things. Maybe-maybe-maybe you're going crazy.“, Sam said his eyes widening.

„I'm not crazy.“

„Well...come on. I mean, you've been at least...half crazy for a long time, and since you got back from hell, or since before that, even. I mean, we're in a--we're in a mental hospital.“ Sam laughed, but there was nothing funny about it. „Maybe-Maybe you finally cracked! You know, maybe now you are really...for real...crazy...“ „I made a mistake, that's all. I'll find the thing.“ „Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. I know.“ Sam put a hand on his shoulder. Dean stared at the hand startled. How much had they given his brother? „It's okay. Hey, hey. Look at me.“, Dean did as he was told. ‘Where was Sam going with this?’ „It's okay...because you're my brother...and I still love ya.“ Dean smiled and a wave of affection hit him as he looked at his brother. „And you should talk to Cas...he could help us too.“ Deans stomach dropped.

 

Dean had left Sam alone and was now again wandering through the halls. ‘ ** _You should talk to Cas._** The words of his brother still lingering in his mind.’ He groaned. ‘It would be so much easier to avoid this topic.’ But as much as he tried to push his feelings away, he was now painfully aware of Cas’ absence. ‘Goddammit.’ Dean sighed. He had only wanted to face Cas again, when he had sorted his thoughts out, but now people were dying and it was his fault. He couldn’t just pray to Cas and hope, that he would turn up. The angel hadn’t been happy, when Dean had told him, that he wanted to hunt only with Sam. He didn’t even know if Cas liked him back. Who was he kidding. Cas hadn’t mentioned their kiss with one word and he was an Angel! Dean was tainted, he knew that. Being in Hell, if there would be another vessel for Michael, Cas wouldn’t even have saved him. He was lucky, that the guy put up with him for that long. Probably because he didn’t know any other people. How could he ever consider the thought of an Angel liking him.’ Dean flinched as he heard a noise behind him. But as he turned around, there was nobody there. Dean shook his head. He was a mess. A paranoid hunter just like Martin. He wished Cas was here. But why should he help him? Dean wasn’t relationship material anyways. The sessions with Doctor Cartwright had only proved, what he had known deep inside.

Maybe he had wanted that once. How often had he imagined himself living a normal life. Sam wasn’t the only one who had sometimes wanted to get away. Away from the Hunting away from Dad. Dean had thought about it. After the incident in Pennsylvania, when he had hooked up with this guy. It was the first time, he had really considered running away. Even packed a backpack. But he hadn’t wanted to leave Sam alone... He remembered the night Sam left for college... The days after, he had been a broken drunk, laughing at the irony of the situation. But he had forgiven his brother a long time ago. He couldn’t even be angry with Sam leaving him then.

John had been worse than ever after this incident. But Dean knew he was hurt too. While he wanted to get away from his Father, he also was his Dad. Despite everything, he loved his father. He couldn’t just leave him... _Like Sam left him._ ’, a little nagging voice said in the back of his mind. Dean shook his head. ‘No why was he thinking like this. Maybe the wraith had him under some kind of mind control...

 _‘You are just trying to give the fault somebody else, like always..._ ‘And it was true. The occasional thought of having a family on his own had haunted him then and now, but he had given up on that dream a long time ago. There had been a spark of hope, when he had met Lisa and Ben. But there would never be a fancy house with a white picket-fence and a happy family living inside. Even if he had wanted to be with Lisa, why would she want that? And if she didn’t want him, why would somebody like Cas even look at him? He wasn’t even able to save Ted. The guy who talked about the monster-’ He was pulled out of his thoughts, when Doctor Cartwright joined him.

„You missed our session today.“, she said, as she continued to walk beside him.

„A little busy.“, Dean replied.

„Still hunting that wraith?“

„People are dying.“, he said shortly.

„People die all the time.“

„Look, lady, why don't you just let me do my job, maybe save your life.“

„It's not my life that I'm worried about.“

„Oh, my G--I am fine, okay?“ Dean stopped dead in his tracks and turned around to face her. „I'm fine.“ ‘He wasn’t suicidal!? _But what did it matter if he wasn’t there anymore?_

„Come on, even you don't believe that. All this pressure that you're putting yourself under, all this guilt; the shame, it's killing you. You can't save everybody. You can't.“ her voice turned hard. „Hell, these days, you can't save anybody, Dean. You are a failure.“, and she turned to leave.

„What did you say?“ Dean asked the doc, who turned around.

„The truth, Dean. Why do you think everybody keeps leaving you? You break everything you touch! You are a mess. A pathetic excuse of a human.“ Dean frowned, a cold feeling crept up his chest and he took a step back. „You couldn't stop Sam from killing Lilith, and--oh, yeah--you broke the first seal. All you do is fail. Did you really think that you, Dean Winchester with a GED and a give-'em-hell attitude, were gonna save the world? That somebody like you is worth the attention of an Angel? That somebody could really love you?“ Dean released a shaky breath, cold sweat running down his neck. He felt like he couldn’t breathe, stomach twisting and he wanted to throw up. But the doc just continued talking. „Please. You are poison to everyone around you.“

„Who are you?“ Dean whispered. „How do you know that stuff?“ But she just stared at him, smiling a twisted smile and Dean could hear her voice ringing through his head. _You are a failure... poison..._

„Tell me!“, he shouted, when suddenly a hand landed on his shoulder.

„Dean.“ The Winchester whirled around. „Who are you talking to?“

„Cas...“, Dean gasped, as he looked at the Angel. Blue eyes taking on a strange expression, as they watched him closer.

„Oh, Dean...“ Castiel said, and Dean stood there, shaking, when Cas suddenly pulled him into a hug. The Hunter shivered. „Shhh, It’s okay Dean.“ Cas said, and Dean gripped the trench-coat tight. „I felt your distress. I’m sorry, I didn’t come sooner, but I thought you didn’t want me around.“, the angel continued. Dean just clutched Cas tighter in response, not trusting himself to do anything else yet. „You should have called me...“ Waves of calm washed over the Winchester and he started to feel more like himself again. Doubtlessly the wraith has had some kind of influence on him. It was gone now, but his dark feelings still lingered under the surface. Cas took a step back and cradled his face between his hands. His thumbs brushing away some lonely tears, Dean hadn’t realized were there.

„There’s a wraith...“, Dean said still trying to get a grip on his emotions.

„I’ll take care of it“, Cas replied. He gently brushed his lips against Deans forehead, before he disappeared with a flutter of his wings. Despite everything, Dean smiled.

Now, no longer haunted by his dark thoughts, he was going to find Sam.

 

Apparently Cas had saved Wendy - the kissing girl -  from being killed by the monster. The happy nurse, wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows as it seemed.

Sam was telling the Doc a fake story, about the nurse, who had drugged and killed the patients, while Dean waited outside. Aided by a little bit of Cas’ grace, the doc had no choice, but to believe them.

Dean thought about, what happened. The wraith had twisted his mind, bringing forth, the darkest of his thoughts. Once he had really wanted a family, with a nice house and a picket fence. But he knew, that he would never have that. And Dean found, that he didn’t want that anyways. As much as Dean hated to admit it, but he would never stop hunting. He was good at it. Dean knew he would die with a gun in his hand. How much tears had been shed because of this. How much pain had he and Sam endured, physically and mentally through this job, because of their fathers obsession and growing up this way. He hated that, and he hated his father for putting him and Sam through this. But the feeling of having saved a innocent live? It made all up for it. And gutting another monster every so often, wasn’t that bad of a feeling either. Who was he kidding?’, Dean thought grinning widely. ‘He loved it!’

‘Hell, he would have loved to have a family, but he could never give up hunting. And he would never put somebody in the danger of this lifestyle. Dean had given up on believing that he could have a relationship. But Cas... He was a bloody angel. Dean had to remind himself every so often, that the weird little guy was actually some badass warrior. He wouldn’t break, just because some kind of monster wanted revenge, by kidnapping someone who was close to him. Or if he stumbled over a ghoul or two in his life. Now, that the end of the world wasn’t looming directly over them, Dean found, that he wanted to try. At least, the Angel deserved to know.’

Dean looked up, when the dark haired Angel appeared right next to him. „Sam is telling Martin goodbye.“, Cas said, after a few seconds. His shoulder almost brushed Deans, as he stared at the building in front of them. Dean looked at Cas face and tried to gather all of his courage to utter out the next words. „I don’t know, if you know, why I did, what I did...When you were almost... The store in Carthage... but I just wanted to let you know, that I love you Cas.“

Dean stared at the ground waiting for Cas to fly away or to tell him, that he was an Angel, that he couldn’t feel this way for him. But once again, Castiel surprised him.

Dean felt a warm hand brushing against his, intertwining their fingers.

„I love you too, Dean.“

 

 

Somewhere in Heaven, Raphael decided, that it was time, that he talked to Azrael.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. Please, if you have the time, leave a comment! I would love to hear your opinion.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction and English isn't my first language so feel free to point out mistakes. I've already written a few chapters. Please comment! I hope you like it and I'll try to update every week.


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